'AITA for walking out of my BF's birthday after he made comments about dad's my age?'
In a post on Reddit a woman (LydiaWilde32_) asked, 'AITA for walking out of my boyfriend's birthday after the comment his dad made about my age?' But if you read the post, you see it's more than just about her age.
"AITA for walking out of my boyfriend's birthday after the comment his dad made about my age?"
I f36 met my boyfriend m38 months ago. He waited to introduce me to his parents and decided that I'd meet them on his 36th birthday party that was held at their house. NGL, I was nervous about a number of things....I'm over 30 but still can get anxious (I'm an introvert yay) around new people.
We got to their house. There were more guests than I thought....like LOT more. When we sat down for dinner, his dad looked at me head to toe and said 'he said, ‘Oh Goddamn!! I thought you’d look a lot older than you do. You’ve still got a good 10 years of s*x kitten left in you!’. I was shocked and completely baffled.
The whole table went quiet and I couldn't even look around me but knew that they were staring at me awkwardly. My boyfriend and his dad were laughing hard. it got so overwhelming for me I excused myself, got up, took my stuff and started making my way out.
My boyfriend followed me while asking where I was going and why. I stood at the door and pointed out his dad's comment about my age. He said his dad is just like that, brutally honest and tells it like it is and so I shouldn't take it personal. I told him it was personal because it felt like he was rating me and my functions as a human based on age.
He was like 'come on!!! do you always have to be so dramatic let it go! it was literally nothing!'. he told me to go back inside but I decided to go home.
He was livid. he sent angry texts talking about how disappointed he and his family were by how I walked out and disrespected them and gave them the wrong impression about me. He also said I ruined his birthday and overreacted to nothing and should've laughed it off.
He's demanding I reach out to his family with apologies and make it up to him. AITA did I overreact?
Here's what people had to say:
0Jinxy said:
NTA. This is how it will always be with his family. He thinks it is funny, so he will be like this also. I would break up and find someone more respectful.
LydiaWilde32_ response from OP:
I'm afraid of this becoming the norm especially with how he said that his dad is always like this.
Expensive_Platypus_9 says:
NTA. The dad gave a rude and misogynistic comment and your bf is defending him and laughing it off. He isn't brutally honest just plain rude and you were right to walk out. He was being disrespectful not you for walking out. Honestly red flags from your bf.
LydiaWilde32_ response from OP:
thank you so much :)
Sea_grave said:
NTA. Also some red flags there. Has you boyfriend always sounded so controlling and dismissive?
LydiaWilde32_ response from OP:
Not usually. I have to say his reaction scared me.
FunkyOrangePenguin says:
NTA. His dad called you a s*x kitten. An aging s*x kitten. In what world are you supposed to laugh that off? He disrespected you. You stood up for herself and they didn’t like that. They expected you to just sit there and smile? That’s absolute bulls%$t.
The apple didn’t fall far from the tree and you should throw it far away from you.
Opposite_Lettuce says:
I physically cringed when I read that line. Inappropriate doesn't even begin to describe it. I'd never be able to look that man in the eye again, let alone the partner who's supposed to protect me and stand by my side. Ew.
LordGalen says:
OP, as a man who is also 'brutally honest and tells it like it is' let me be brutally honest and tell it like it is. Your bf's dad is TA and your bf is one too.
So that's what people had to say.