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Woman finds out sister is pregnant with twins, responds negatively, upsets sister. UPDATED.

Woman finds out sister is pregnant with twins, responds negatively, upsets sister. UPDATED.


Honesty is the best policy, in theory.

But in reality, there are social codes we're all expected to adhere to, and that means sometimes it's best to keep your most honest thoughts to yourself. Or in the very least, make sure the recipient truly wants to hear what you're thinking before spewing it out.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she was wrong for blurting out her first thought when her sister announced she's pregnant with twins.

She wrote:

AITA for saying 'Again?' after my sister announced that she's pregnant with twins?

My (21 F) sister (32 F) has been married to her husband 33 M for 8 years. They already have 6 kids total, the last one born 5 months ago. Yesterday, my sister announced that she's 3 months pregnant with twins, and while everyone was congratulating her, I said out loud 'oh my god, again? Can't your stupid husband leave you alone?'

I didn't mean to say it out loud, but it slipped out and my sister looked at me angrily and literally dragged me into another room and asked 'Why tf did you say that?' I told her that she and her husband have been pregnant every year for the last 8 years and that she needs to take a break. I was worried about her having so many babies in such a short time and I didn't want anything bad happening to her.

She then said 'How about YOU leave us alone and worry about your own s@#t? This is MY life, so f*#k off.' My mother told me that I should apologize for being rude but I told her that I won't apologize for showing concern. But now I just can't help thinking that maybe I was being an AH and sticking my nose into other people's business. I was just worried but maybe I was being a jerk. AITA?

Edit). Yes, I do babysit my sister's kids sometimes, and all 6 of them at the same time whenever they need me to and if I'm available. They pay me $30-$50/hour, but their kids are pretty destructive and they don't respect other adults like they're supposed to, so it's a full chore watching after them.

I'm aware that the 'stupid husband' comment was inappropriate, but I have almost no filter and my stupid mouth says s#$t before my brain can stop it. And umm...I've seen some comments talk about the ages and assuming my sister is 21? I'M 21f, my sister is 32f, and her husband is 33m.

Unsurprisingly, the post inspired a lot of responses.

tubesweaterguru wrote:


'I said out loud 'oh my god, again?'

Rude and AH behavior, but somewhat understandable.

'Can't your stupid husband leave you alone??'

What is wrong with you? You said this out loud, and still think you may not be the AH? Get out of here with that nonsense.

glamourcrow wrote:

YTA. But it needed to be said.

You are a good AH.

beanfiddler wrote:

YTA. Look, I don't fault you for thinking that. All of my SILs are prolific Mormon housewives. I have so many nieces and nephews it's obscene. I and my wife make jokes about the eighth kid rappeling down the umbilical cord or falling out when we're alone together. In front of the rest of the family? We offer our congratulations. She could be healthy. Maybe not, but she's right, that is none of your concern.

If she's not having massive issues with the pregnancies and her husband has never given you abusive vibes, their incessant breeding is really none of your business. Just apologize and explain that you were initially concerned, but now realize that it's none of your business.

Maybe throw in that you were being biased because you could never have so many children unless something hinky was going on, but you realize that your sister isn't you, and that you just happy to know that she's happy and healthy and really feel bad about embarrassing her and yourself in front of the family.

fat_slopss wrote:

In my opinion NTA. That's too many kids to give adequate care to and being pregnant consecutively for that long probably is REALLY hard on someone's body and mental health whether they wanna admit it or not.

Aardeehar wrote:

NTA. We as a society need to move away from this idea that parents are above reproach. That's too many children to adequately care for in today's society. You could have been more tactful, but someone needs to think about the wellbeing of her kids here.

After receiving lots of feedback, OP shared an update:

UPDATE). I apologized to my sister for insulting her husband and making that rude comment but I told her that I'm still worried about her having so many kids back to back and that just concerned in general about her health and well-being. She actually forgave me, and she said it's because:

1. I'm her youngest sister, 2. She knows about my problem with keeping my thoughts to myself and that I'm working on myself, and 3. She knows that I am concerned for her and she appreciates it, but she has assured me that she's fine and said that this pregnancy wasn't planned and her husband plans on getting a vasectomy because they both want this pregnancy to be the last.

For those asking in the comments, she and her husband can afford to have kids. He runs a very successful business and she is still co-partner with her best friend in a company that they both started before she got married. How she manages to juggle being a full-time mom and work here and there is beyond me, but she does. That's why I babysit sometimes when the nanny isn't available 24/7.

Her husband was the one who initially wanted a big family and my sister just went along with the idea. But that's their business.

It sounds like OP and her sister were luckily able to come to a place of understanding and peace about the word vomit, which is good, because it could've caused a major rift in their relationship.

Sources: Reddit
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