Woman refuses to give up bedroom for pregnant sister; is told to 'suck it up.'
Navigating roommate dynamics is tough enough on its own. But it's extra hard when one roomie gets pregnant, or wants a partner to basically move in, and a massive wrench is thrown in the balance of space and privacy.
Finding a way for all parties to hold their own ground while ceding enough for a compromise can be quite tricky.
In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she's wrong for not wanting to switch her room just because her sister is pregnant.
She wrote:
AITA for insisting my pregnant sister switch bedrooms with me?
Throwaway because I don’t want it connected to my main. My sister and I (both mid-20sF, I’m a few years older) share a house together. It was our parents' house and we both inherited it after they died. We have equal share/ownership of the house. The house has four bedrooms, one is the master room and has an ensuite and walk-in wardrobe, the other three just have built-in robes.
When we both moved back in after deciding that neither of us wanted to sell, we agreed that she could have the master suite, but the two largest of the other bedrooms would both be mine. One as an actual bedroom and the other as a gaming room for me. The last and smallest bedroom is a guest room. Her boyfriend’s been living here for a while and she recently told me that she’s pregnant.
I’m not particularly looking forward to sharing a house with a screaming baby, but it’s her house too and she has every right to be here and raise her kid. Obviously, the baby will need a bedroom, and I was expecting that to be the guest room. It is the smallest bedroom in the house, but it’s still the same size as a standard bedroom. But my sister wouldn’t go for that.
She’s insisting I move my stuff out of my games room so that can be that baby’s room. I told her that I’m not moving my stuff into the guest room, because that wasn’t our agreement, but then she informed me that actually, I won’t be able to do that either, as we would still need a guest room, especially with the baby coming as her bf’s family will want to visit.
So I said fine, you can have my games room, if you move into my room and give me the master room. She started crying and said that as a mother, she’s going to need her own space and she deserves the master bedroom. I asked what she expected me to do, and she said I should just suck it up and keep ‘all my crap’ in my own room. We’re at an impasse and I can’t get her to come to a real agreement with me.
She keeps calling me a ‘huge b**ch’ and says that I should let her have both the master bedroom and my gaming room because she ‘needs them more’ her boyfriend says I should just deal with it, that because I don’t want kids anyway, I should just let suck it up. My girlfriend, who also spends a lot of time here, is on my side and says my sister is being a spoiled entitled little brat. AITA?
People on Reddit had OP's back, and some larger theories about the situation.
sunnydays0306 wrote:
NTA about giving up your rooms, but I am very doubtful this living situation is going to last. She’s doing a slow take over and it will only get worse (especially if she has more kids). Have you ever discussed her buying out your share? Or honestly just selling and getting your own home?
callmesillysally wrote:
NTA. Do not under any circumstances give up your gaming room or else they’re going to try and move you out of that house. Tell her to take the guest room and make it an even 2 bedrooms for each. The boyfriend’s family can sleep on the sofa or they can go to a hotel. You own half of the house, not him.
ResoluteMuse wrote:
Sister gets one or the other but not both.
Time to either buy out, be bought out, or sell outright.
NTA.
Smart_Ad_3604 wrote:
NTA. But this will only get worse when the baby you don’t want around arrives. Sell the house. Split the profits. Go your separate ways and then hopefully you can retain a relationship with your sister.
OP is most definitely NTA, and if anything, she needs to get out ASAP before the situation gets worse.