One woman was tentatively and slowly trying to build a better relationship with her sister. She wanted her 5-year-old daughter to have a relationship with her aunt. In attempt to forge that bond, she suggested they have a sleepover so her sister could bond and babysit her niece. When she returned, what she found made her decide that they would not be spending time together again any time soon.
I have a daughter Rebecca, she is 5 years old now and can be quite a handful at times. I have never had any problems catching up to her if she were to run off, she doesn't really run off anywhere in the first place, she prefer to just sit in area and play with toys.
My sister is heavier, probably around 250 pounds, and growing up we didn't have the best relationship. She was 10 years older and she usually saw me as the annoying kid. We started to slowly reconnecting this year, and she got to get to know my kid.
Overall I thought it was going great. This week we had Rebecca sleep over her auntie so they could bond more, it was my sister's idea.
I came and picked up Rebecca today and she was on a child leash. I was shocked. She was on a leash basically since an hour after we left yesterday at her house.
I confronted her about it and she told me Rebecca was too fast to keep up with. That this was the easiest solution. This started an argument and resulted in me telling her that she is too heavy and lazy to watch my child.
She can't keep up with a kid that likes to sit and play with toys so she put her on a leash. She started defending herself more and called me an a**hole. I told her she will never be alone or probably seeing Rebecca for a good long time.
My mom called and she heard about it, she is on my sister's side. AITA?
NTA- See I never saw a problem with the lead for when hyperactive kids are out with their parents, but again key words being hyperactive and outside. This is just lazy, and an overstep of your trust.
Not to mention your daughter is old enough to realize dogs go on leashes, which would probably be jarring for a rather unbothered and calm child.
NTA. I can see using a child leash in a busy mall, airport etc, when a kid could scamper off quickly. However, in a home? That’s borderline abuse.
My brother was a leash kid, because my mom had him and my sister 18 months apart, and my sister was suuuuuper clingy. My brother was cool as soon as he could walk, BUT he would bolt, and when my mom already had my sister to deal with he was too hard to catch. So he was a leash kid in public until he learned to quit doing that. Gotta do what you gotta do.
Where did she magically produce a child leash from if she has no children? Sounds like she planned ahead for this. I have absolutely used one in appropriate places for safety.
There is nothing appropriate about using one indoors with a child who is merely active, not a 'runner'. Did she force her to sleep in it? NTA
Is it possible that she has never watched a 5 year old before, and got a leash ahead of time because she didn't know how else to make sure she'd stay safe? Maybe she was worried about her running around the house and getting into something dangerous.
Maybe your sister simply needs to know more about watching a child. It would be worth it to talk to her- and your child- about how the whole thing actually went down. Did she leash your kid and leave her there alone for hours? Or did she follow her around the house, just on a leash?
Did you kid have fun at her aunt's house? Has your sister child-proofed her house? Did something happen that prompted her to use the leash, or was the leash her plan to head off any potential issues?
NTA. Her weight and her willingness to chase your child (if needed) was the reasoning behind the leash so, given that the leash isn’t an option for your child, she can’t adequately care for her. I’m so floored that she put your child on a leash and I wouldn’t continue the relationship honestly!
ESH. YTA for saying what you did, yeah. She’s the a**hole for putting your child on a child leash without permission. If someone put my kid on a leash without asking me they’d never be watching my kid again.
But the resulting argument shouldn’t dissolve to a point of calling your sister too heavy and lazy to take care of your kid. That seems more like an emotionally-fueled personal attack instead of a point made in an argument.