'AITA for refusing to go to Dubai after my friend invited his stepbrother who shoplifts?'

In general, you want to mind your Ps and Qs when you're traveling. Which means being extra careful about who you travel with, and what their patterns are.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, the OP asked if they were wrong for refusing to go to Dubai after a friend invited his stepbrother. They wrote:

"AITA for refusing to go to Dubai after my friend invited his step brother who has a history of shoplifting and running out on restaurant bills? He is now calling me racist."

For the past 5 months me and my friend call him Tom had a trip to Dubai planned. We were going to fly there with Business class with our credit card points, we got a beautiful spot in the Marina. However, last minute he said he wants to bring his step brother. Now his stepbrother has a history of stealing, and I've seen him do it when we went to Miami together.

But I don’t want to be there if he tries it in the Middle East. I told Tom I am not going with him, and that if he comes I’ll cancel. Now Tom and his brother are calling me a r*cist (Tom’s step bro is Black). Tom’s brother said he is not going to do that s#$t there, but I don’t want to take that risk especially when the consequences are so high.

This is getting to the point where I think Tom said he’ll cut me off if I cancel on him. Tom’s brother already telling people I am a r*cist.

The internet did not hold back one bit.

KronkLaSworda wrote:

"Tom’s brother already telling people I am a racist."

Of course he is. Known thief isn't getting what he wants, so he's going to slander you for good measure.

"I think Tom said he’ll cut me off if I cancel on him"

So be it.

He invited someone else at the last minute to your trip. AH move

He invited a known thief to travel with you to a VERY strict country when it comes to theft.

He and his bro are calling you racist because they aren't getting what they want. NTA and time to drop both of them from your life. Tell your common friend that you're being slandered to what they're doing and why.

Bont_Tarentaal wrote:

NTA. It is called thinking ahead, and you are absolutely correct in refusing to go with. Stand your ground, let them go on their own, and if something happens over there, you're not involved. It is not worth it by getting involved and end up in jail.

MattC1977 wrote:

There's places in the world where you can act like a turd and get away with it, and there's places in the world where you absolutely need to mind your P's and Q's. Dubai is definitely the latter. If I was in your position, I would have done the same.

PandaLand447 wrote:

NTA.

His actions have shown he's willing to take the risks, which in a foreign nation aren't likely going to end well for you being with him. Stick to your guns.

Hot_Box_4574 wrote:

NTA. It's not his skin color that made him steal in Miami. It's his bad character and you seem smart to not want to get in trouble with this guy in Dubai.

HereWeGoAgain-1979 wrote:

NTA. You two planned the trip, why would you want to go with a third person? I would say «no, we have planned this trips. If you want to go with your brother I am out - nothing against you brother, but it is not what I signed up for» And about the stealing…if he pulls that s#$t in Dubai he will be in deep trouble.

AndSoItGoes24 wrote:

Your behavior isn't racist. Its pragmatic. NTA. Unless you implied they will cut off his stepbrother's hand if they catch him stealing, how are you being racist here? Impulse control problems don't go dormant just because we take a long plane ride and visit a fresh locale. WTH is your friend talking about? As a minority, I really can't see what your friend is on about? He makes no freaking sense to me?

LhasaApsoSmile wrote:

NTA. You have solid proof that the step-brother steals? No racism there.nThe Saudi's don't take kindly to criminals. Here is what I would do with Tom & his brother: print out the list of all the crimes and the punishments. Read them together one-by-one. Have brother initial each crime to acknowledge that he knows the consequences.

The essential problem is that the guy does not have impulse control. I would never want to be in a situation in a Middle Eastern country with someone like that.

OP is definitely NTA here, although it sounds like this friendship might come to an end regardless.