Bride gets yelled at by cousins for throwing childfree wedding, half of family bails.

Weddings are deeply expensive, which is why it's crucial to think long and hard about what your budget allows, and only invite the amount of guests you know you can afford.

Sadly, making these choices isn't easy, and feelings are bound to get hurt along the way.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a bride asked if she was wrong for not letting her cousin bring their baby to the wedding.

She wrote:

AITA for not letting my cousin bring their newborn baby to my wedding?

I (26f) got married about 6 months ago, it was amazing and everything I dreamed of as a little girl! Even before I was engaged or planning a wedding I knew I did not want children under the age of 10 at my wedding unless my partner had kids that needed to be included (they did not).

To give a bit of background my parents are the younger siblings of 6 children each so my family is quite big and my cousins are all older than me. When planning my wedding I was told by the catering company I hired that even if they are less than a year old if they eat a bit of food we will charge the $65 per plate…weddings are expensive.

This requirement though was going to help me back my claim to not let any kids younger than 10 to come, or so I thought. We sent out the save the dates all my cousins called telling me they were excited everything seemed ok because all of them seemed fine with the children rule. This lasted until the invitations were sent out.

To avoid anyone being confused on who was allowed to RSVP, my mom and I prefilled out the numbers of guest attending for each party. As those who know you need to have your final numbers in for everything at least a month in advance so we required all RSVPs be sent back a month before the wedding.

The time came to tally up numbers and my cousin (34M) and his wife (32F) have yet to respond so I reach out. Nothing. Wait a week and reach out again. Nothing. Now to put some background on us I talked to this pair almost weekly, they were the siblings I never had. This ghosting was weird. So I go over to their place to see if they could talk in person.

I get there and see both cars are home I knock on the door to avoid waking the baby. My cousin's wife swings open the door already with an angry look. I ask to come in. No. I ask if we can talk. No. Finally, my cousin appears and his wife runs off crying. I ask why they hadn’t RSVPd back and what’s going on.

He tells me I’m a jerk and @$$hole for not allowing them to bring their kid and they hope my wedding goes terrible. He then closes the door leaving me shocked. To give more background the birth and conception of the kid was rough so this baby is a miracle. I love this kid, just don’t want it at my wedding.

The day before the wedding my aunt calls demanding why I won’t invite my cousins and why her DIL won’t come out of the house. This causes half of my mom's family to not show. The wedding still happened and as said awesome. My mom's side of the family still refuses to talk to us and are requesting I apologize to my cousin and his wife for not inviting them and their baby to my wedding.

I really love them and never meant to make them feel this way but this was how I wanted my wedding. So AITA if I stand my ground and not apologize?

Edit: Was just informed a 9-month-old isn’t a newborn it’s just a baby so it’s a baby!

The post inspired a lot of responses.

Careless_League_9494 wrote:

Honestly NTA. I've got four kids, and if someone told me that their wedding was a no kids event, I'd get a friggin babysitter. You don't get to make demands for accommodations at someone else's wedding.

past-her-prime wrote:

NTA. A childfree wedding is childfree wedding. Period. I'm a mom. Going to a wedding postpartum with a newborn sounds like the 7th circle of hell. I question your cousins' choices. And your male cousin is a massive AH for what he said.

Stand your ground. The dust will settle. These nodal events bring out the best and worst in people. As long as you came out of the day happy that all that matters. Hang in there.

ETA: The baby is a 9 month old? Ha. Yeah you're definitely not the AH. Your cousins need a clue.

dart1126 wrote:

NTA. The minute they said they hope the wedding goes terrible, it’s all over. They’re pouting about a universal and reasonable rule you set. It would have been fine had they simply declined, saying they weren’t ready to leave the baby with a sitter yet.

For them to take such an aggressive stance that they wished you ill, and rallied troops against you, and you are STILL feeling such fallout six months later you’re asking strangers for their thoughts? No, rest easy.

SillyStallion wrote:

You didn’t exclude them from the wedding, you just gave them two options - get a babysitter or decline. I’m with you but I’d be no one under 18 - I’ve been to a few weddings where young teens have been pinching drinks off tables and ended up horrendously drunk and caused a scene. Then there’s the kids that just take over the dance floor sliding on their arses and knocking granny over

OP is NTA, but her family is full of them.