Bride refuses to change bridesmaid dress for sister who thinks pink is 'too girly.' AITA?
Bridesmaid dresses are notorious for being ugly, or more accurately, for not being flattering to all of the bridesmaids. While the casual onlooker might say everyone looks beautiful in a wedding photo, the behind-the-scenes drama around bridesmaid dresses - the cut, color, and general feel of them, cannot be underestimated.
In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she's wrong for refusing to change the color of her sister's bridesmaid dress. She wrote:
"AITA for refusing to change the color of my sister's bridesmaid dress, even though she hates it?"
I can't believe I'm posting about this but I really need some insight. I (23f) am getting married to my fiancé (25m) in November. We're really excited and the day is fast approaching. I have 5 women being my bridesmaids, one of them is my sister, Millie (21f). Millie has always been more of a tomboy growing up but doesn't have an issue with wearing dresses for formal events.
I want my bridesmaids to wear matching dresses, which everyone knew when they accepted. I bought and paid for the dresses. They're a relatively simple style and in a pastel pink color. Millie is now angry and saying she won't wear the dress because it's pink and "too girly." She's even threatening to not attend the wedding anymore unless I return her dress and pick out another color.
I'm distraught that she'd make such a problem out of a dress color when she knew I wanted the bridesmaids to match. I think Millie is being dramatic and could deal with wearing the dress for one day but tbh my feelings are really hurt that she'd threaten to drop out of the wedding over this.
My fiancé thinks I should kick her out of the wedding party before she causes bigger problems closer to or on the day. My parents got themselves involved in this and told me to just exchange the dress for the same one in a different color and that we're both acting like children. WIBTA if I told Millie to suck it up and wear the dress if she wants to be a bridesmaid, and not budge on the issue?
People kept it real in the comment section.
spoiledrichwhitegirl wrote:
NTA. Whether she is a tomboy is irrelevant. She agreed to be a bridesmaid. This is what you chose. I’d have more sympathy in the event the style was extremely low cut & it didn’t fit a busty woman or something of that nature. Simply hating the colour? Deal with it. It’s one day & she didn’t have to pay for it.
Disastrous_Cress_701 wrote:
NTA give her two options
Wear the dress. It's one day. Pink isn't going to make her suddenly turn into Elle Woods. Don't wear the dress and come as a guest or don't attend, her choice.
If you give in on one thing she's just going to keep throwing tantrums. I don't want flowers they're girly. Ew make up? Girly. I don't do my hair like that, too girly.
Don't let there be any more arguments, don't listen to anyone else, other than fiancee.
Reevadare1990 wrote:
NTA. It’s a color. It won’t change her whole identity to wear pink for one day 🙄
PS I despise the color pink with the passion. Especially pastel pink. If my sister or best friend asked me to wear it for their wedding I’d say “Yes ma’am!” (Maybe gripe to my husband in private, but still wear it!)
LowBalance4404 wrote:
NTA and I would give Millie a choice. "This is the dress. Wear it or don't be in the bridal party. Those are the choices."
Deep-Manner-4111 wrote:
NTA. Don't budge. She is being so selfish and ridiculous. It's YOUR wedding day and she is making it about herself. She seriously can't suck it up and wear pink for one day? If she wants to make a fool of herself and back out of the wedding over something so childish and stupid, let her.
She'll be the one regretting it when she looks back years from now. You just focus on enjoying her day, and try not to worry about her bad attitude. The way she's acting isn't fair to you.
OP is NTA here, her sister is clearly being immature and selfish.