'My officiant brought guests without asking. One of them caught my bouquet.' UPDATED
"My officiant brought guests without asking. One of them caught my bouquet."
So, long story short, the original officiant we chose and loved had to back out for personal reasons. We were disappointed, but a replacement was assigned quickly. The original choice told us the replacement was very professional and would perform the ceremony perfectly.
Cut to the end of the ceremony, we do the recessional, and I notice 2 women I’ve never seen in my life sitting in the back. One was wearing a sparkly deep v-neck club dress that had her breasts on full display, but thankfully the other guest and the officiant were both dressed for the occasion.
I was not asked if the officiant could bring guests. I was asked if she could stay through the reception and said yes, but never approved extra heads. We had a pretty strict guest limit so that was frustrating.
Cut to the reception, it’s time to do my bouquet toss, I’m excited to see which of my friends or cousins catches the bouquet. The toss happens, I turn around, and the complete stranger in the sparkly dress is holding my bouquet while jumping around, screaming and laughing.
I was flabbergasted. Not one of my guests celebrated with her so she was just alone dancing around with my bouquet while everyone else awkwardly tried to just move past it.
People were walking up to me all night asking me who she was, why she was there, why she thought it was acceptable to insert herself in the crowd for the toss. It’s been 3 days and my coworkers are still talking about it.
11/25: I just went onto the company’s Instagram page and saw that the original officiant, who backed out due to “having surgery for his knee scheduled on the day before the wedding” performed a ceremony on the same date and time as my wedding. This part is a lot harder to laugh off, I am livid about this lie.
Edit 11/26: The county called to let me know my marriage license was received, so I have posted my reviews on all sites I could find them on!
Edit 11/27 THANKSGIVING DAY: I hope I dreamed this but I just got done arguing the facts with the officiant WHO WAS NOT THERE because he lied and perfomed another ceremony instead. I have heard nothing from the replacement who brought her inappropriately dressed friends.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
I'm sorry this happened to you. Very unprofessional on the officiant part. I'm not sure if there is a place to report them but I definitely would look into that. For your coworkers to keep bringing it up is very mean and rude, you are obviously upset about it (understandably so) so for them to keep bring it up is not ok.
sashikku (OP)
Honestly, at this point I’m laughing it off. A good friend gave us the gift of being our videographer and he got that moment on film, my face is priceless. He recorded the whole toss, her catching it, my guests being like “who tf is this woman,” and then he quickly pans over to my face where I’m like 😨 and hits me with a dramatic zoom. It’s actually hysterical.
One of my bridesmaids went up to the woman’s table and stole the bouquet back and we gave it to our friend that should be getting engaged very soon.
Sorry this happened. The officiant and the sparkly woman's actions revealed a lot more about themselves than about you. Don't let their choices ruin the fact that you got married. You can mention the surprise guests if you ever leave a review for the officiant.
Four days later, the OP retuned with an update.
I am sadly not here to share a happy update. The original officiant we’d chosen, the liar, sent me a 10 paragraph text message wanting to argue with me about my review on Thanksgiving day.
Firstly, he states that the bouquet was caught fair and square by the person who “happened to be the tallest in the group.” The video shows this to be laughably false. Two guests in the video (including the one she snatched the bouquet from) are clearly taller than her.
Either way, it’s a moot point. She never should have been a part of that moment to begin with. She never should have joined the group at all. She shouldn’t have even been at the wedding in the first place. To argue that she was just so tall that the bouquet just happened to fall to her is completely insane to me.
Secondly, he is doubling down on his surgery lie. He told me he was at home recovering on 11/22. I sent him the screenshot from his own page where he clearly states that he performed that ceremony on 11/22/2025.
I also sent him screenshots of me straight up asking the other vendors he tagged who confirmed that this wedding was, in fact, performed on 11/22. I sent him screenshots from the bride and groom’s instagram pages showing that their wedding was on 11/22.
He is literally in a photo with a welcome sign that shows the date of the wedding as 11/22. I can’t even begin to understand what he thinks he’s doing by repeatedly lying to me about this. I did attach all screenshots with explanations to all reviews on the 6 platforms I’ve posted them on so far.
Thirdly, he says that officiants NEVER stay for the reception and always leave immediately following the signing of the marriage license. He says that the replacement only stayed at our DIRECT REQUEST.
He himself, during our first meeting, said that he would be staying for the reception. Specifically telling us that he would be at the bar ordering tequila shots immediately after the license was signed. That should have been a red flag, in hindsight.
Because HE told US that he WOULD be staying for the reception, we told the replacement that she could as well during our “get to know you” meeting with her. We did NOT approve extra guests coming with her nor did she even ask about bringing anyone. Let alone 2 extra heads. That’s it. That’s the update.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Please include his insane responses to your reviews in those reviews. People need to know what a loon this guy is.
sashikku (OP)
I did! My reviews are extremely detailed and I included screenshots of EVERYTHING. I let him know that I would be adding screenshots of his texts to my reviews to highlight his horrible attitude, he said my attitude was the problem and that he was “being a professional.”
I wouldn’t just want my money back, I would want to be reimbursed for the 2 extra plates and the cost of the toss bouquet.