In general, if you don't want a precious object to be damaged, then you should keep it safe from high-risk situations. In this context, situations where a lot of drunk people will be around definitely counts as 'high-risk.'
However, there's no chill way to say dear friends, I am putting away my nice things because I don't trust you.'
She wrote:
AITA for saying that I don't want an expensive tray stolen at a wedding?
My boyfriend (30M) and I (30F) were invited to his friend's wedding. I've met the bride and groom a few times, he has known them for decades. There is a local tradition for each guest to bring a dozen cookies to the wedding, then at the wedding, everybody's cookies are displayed together to make a cookie table. We wanted to participate, so we baked cookies the night before.
I have a very beautiful and expensive tea tray. Boyfriend suggested that I use it to display the cookies. I said no, it's a 300-person wedding, I don't want some auntie 'accidentally' taking it home with her. Boyfriend seemed fine with this, we found a simple bowl that was perfectly appropriate for the occasion, and used that to display the cookies.
After the wedding as we were preparing to leave and I went to retrieve my bowl, boyfriend told the newlyweds that I didn't want to use my tea tray because I thought one of their guests might steal it. I tried to backtrack by saying that I just didn't want it to get misplaced or damaged, but he 'called me out on lying.'
The newlyweds said something about everyone there being friends and family, it was very awkward and we left shortly. I am angry because I told him that in confidence and he should have known better than to repeat that to his friends, even though they were very close.
Imaginary_Building_4 wrote:
NTA, but your man sure is! No more cookies for him until he learns to behave better in public.
Realistic_Head4279 wrote:
NTA. Over the years, I have lost many things at potlucks. It happens. You were correct in using something you could live without if it got lost in the shuffle. Your BF was a bit crass in bringing up your concern, IMHO.
Forward_Squirrel8879 wrote:
NTA - What is your BF's problem? What could he possibly hope to have accomplished by saying that?
electric29 wrote:
Your boyfriend is a jerk. And this s#$t DOES happen. I loaned my very perfect and expensive silver tea service for a wedding. As I was in the wedding, I didn't see what they were up to until it was too late. Someone took my service off the tray, and used a carving knife to cut up meat and cheese on the tray. Gouging huge score marks all over it.
It is ruined. So NTA for wanting your property to be protected, but I would seriously consider if you want to be in a relationship with someone who would do you dirty like that.
OP is definitely NTA, but her boyfriend is a big enough one she might do well to sit him down and have a real talk.