Of course everyone wants to cut weddings costs down in whatever ways they can, but there are many ways to keep it classy while sticking to a strict budget. The best thing to avoid? Let's start with replacing recently deceased relatives in the most obvious ways possible. So, when a frustrated wedding guest needed to vent to the gloriously petty and spiteful group, 'Wedding Shaming,' about her mysterious and sudden plus-one, people were eager to pile on and join the dragging session.
On Valentine's day this year I married the love of my life. He has been around for years, has attended family events, and was a huge help taking care of my terminally ill father.
About this time, I received a save the date to my cousin's fall wedding. I say 'I' because it was addressed to me and me alone, no plus one option and no mention of my husband.
Now their venue is nice but a bit small (I know because I looked at it myself) so I thought maybe cousins don't get to bring their spouses. Would be very odd for our family dynamic, as we are all very close. So I asked around...
Nope, every other significant other was invited, married or not. I admit, I was a bit offended that my spouse was so clearly excluded. I asked my aunt (mother of the groom) if she could quietly confirm for me, and yes he was not on the list.
Fast forward a few months. My husband and I are going through hell while my father declines, begins hospice care, and eventually passes. I put this wedding from my mind, planning internally to just not attend. When the final invites arrive, what do you know, it is addressed to BOTH my husband and I. How did they find the extra seat for him?
My father had been invited. I heard from some other cousins that they explicitly gave my husband his slot after he passed. We did end up going, but the wedding kinda sucked anyway!
'Cocktail hour' lasted nearly 3 hours, one of our cousins had a diabetic crash due to the wait. Cash bar but they didnt tell anyone before hand and there were no prices listed so you found out after you ordered you 10 buck beer. Also the DJ did trivia. Not my thing personally.
Family sucks. I would have just bailed after that bullsh*t.
I would not have attended.
I would have asked why he wasn’t invited. And then not attend.
While the bride/groom are awful, that so pales in comparison to what an incredible husband you have. Which probably makes you more upset at this slight, but you’re so blessed. I’m so sorry what you went through with your father. Screw them & their wedding, it’s meaningless when you’ve won the husband lottery.