I don't even know what to think right now. My best friend since childhood got married last weekend. She had a unplugged wedding, an unplugged wedding is where you don’t go on your phone at all. I totally respect that and might even do it for my future wedding. The entire morning of her wedding was beautiful and the ceremony was unforgettable.
When the reception began, my sister called me. I didn’t answer, but was confused why she was calling me because I told my family to not contact me since it was no phones.
She blew my phone up, sending me around 70 calls. It got to the point where I had to answer. My best friend is usually understanding so I thought she would be okay with this.
My sister told me my mom was in a accident. (She’s okay, by the way, only a concussion.) Someone saw me on the phone and told my best friend. I went to go find my best friend to tell her I had to leave and she yelled at me for being on my phone. I explained the situation to her and she told me that wasn’t a excuse and I could have waited till after the wedding.
I left immediately, not only because of her stupidity but because I also had to go to the hospital. She’s texted me and cussed me out telling me that it wasn’t that hard to not be on my phone.
A few of our friends and her husband also called me names. My family is saying I’m not the a hole but I can’t help but feel bad. I also don’t think this is worth loosing a life long friendship. She was like a sister to me. Also for context, I was not a bridesmaid, She didn’t have any bridesmaids.
EDIT: Quick edit just to clear a few things up because if I see one more comment saying I should’ve went someone more secret I might loose it lol. I went to the parking lot, I tried the bathroom but a few people were in there.
The parking lot was empty. Also, this is not the first time my best friend has been awful. There have been other situations where she was the A hole. Like when I couldn’t hang out because my sister was having a baby, and wanted me there.
She isn’t very considerate when it comes to medical issues if you can’t tell. Her honeymoon ends on Sunday, so I’ll message her then. I’ll definitely be removing the best part in best friend from now on.
EDIT 2: Final update! So I messaged her yesterday asking if we can talk. She said she doesn’t want to meet in person because, “I might just up and leave if another one of my family members get hurt.” I asked if we can talk on the phone and she said yes.
I basically told her the entire story and my point of view. She told me I still was the A hole and I wouldn’t be invited to future events. She told me the reason she was so upset is because I stole her attention and light on her day. she acted like I planned this and planned for my mom to get into a accident to steal her shine??
I basically told her that her point of view is fucked up and self centered. This incident has just made me realize how bad of a friend she actually is. I told her to not contact me and that we weren’t friends anymore. I also asked her who tattled on me when i was on the phone, and it was her mom. her mom has always been the mom that doesn’t like you. she always treated me bad so I’m not shocked lmao.
she’s tried changing her number and reaching out to me this morning but I told her to stop trying to contact me or I’ll get police involved. I also changed my number so none of her family and friends can contact me.
NTA. You were right to answer your sister's calls about your mom's accident, that's definitely an emergency situation. It's a bummer that your friend didn't understand and got upset, even after you explained it.
Maybe give it a little time for everyone to cool off, then try having a talk with her about what happened. It's hard when a long-time friendship hits a bump like this, but honest talks can sometimes clear the air. Just take care of yourself too, dealing with family emergencies and friend drama at the same time is no joke.
Let the bride contact you.. you did nothing wrong, she needs to apologize.
OP went out into the parking lot to answer the call and that one thing stole the attention from the bride for the whole day? Uhhhhh I am so glad I am not surrounded by people who think and behave like this.
So NTA. Why do brides think that every edict must be followed despite extenuating circumstances? (I used to be a wedding photog...this drama moment doesn't surprise me at all). You were right to answer your sister. No one calls that much unless there is an emergency. (glad she's ok)
NTA first off…it’s usually unplugged CEREMONIES. Not through entire reception. You said the ceremony was unforgettable and noticed the calls at the reception. Which means you didn’t answer or even look at your phone during the ceremony.
Therefore NTA. An unplugged ceremony yes…an entire wedding no. There are probably a bunch of parents who left kids at home with a relative or babysitter- what if a kid had an emergency…would she flip out?
NTA. Your mom was in an accident -- you went to the hospital. Your friend is not the center of the universe. And you didn't disrupt her wedding from what you describe. You want to save the friendship you say:
So you're sorry you had to leave/handle a family emergency, but it was necessary. That's it. And maybe downgrade your friendship a little -- your BF lacks empathy and is self-involved.