'TIFU by accidentally ruining a wedding over a misplaced joke.'
"TIFU by accidentally ruining a wedding over a misplaced joke."
kappusha
So this actually happened last weekend, but the repercussions are still unfolding, and I’m feeling more horrible as each day passes. I was at my cousin’s wedding—a pretty big deal since it was the first family gathering after all the lockdowns.
Everything was perfect:
The venue, the food, the decorations. Spirits were high, and maybe that’s why I overestimated my sense of humor at the moment.
During the reception, there was an open mic for toasts. After a few drinks, feeling overly confident in my comedic timing, I decided to contribute. My "joke" was about how my cousin (the bride) had always said she'd only get married when pigs fly. And then I followed up by pointing out her ex at one of the tables who used to have a pet pig. What I thought would be taken as playful ribbing absolutely wasn't.
Turns out not everyone knew about their past or his pet pig—most importantly, the groom didn’t. The room went silent; you could literally hear a pin drop. The groom got upset, thinking there were still unresolved feelings between my cousin and her ex.
The rest of the evening turned into chaos with family members taking sides, arguing about whether or not it was appropriate for her ex to even be there. My attempt at humor ended up spiraling into heated discussions about relationships and trust within our own family dynamics.
Now I’m banned from two upcoming family events and have become somewhat of a pariah. My cousin is still talking to me but says it's going to take some time for everything to calm down with her new husband. Lesson learned: Alcohol and microphones are a dangerous mix at weddings.
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
Angry_Pterodactyl
Let's talk about how the bride invited her ex to the wedding without telling the groom...woof.
GingerIsTheBestSpice
Maybe it was her cousin... or his! Small town or large social group, exes are always at weddings. This could be the guy she "dated" in 6th grade. Highly unlikely it was just him there by himself. Source: I lived in a small town & probably there were exes at mine, there definitely were at all the others I went to.
CalliopePenelope
It’s just common etiquette not to bring up romantic history in wedding toasts. The fact the groom didn’t know about who the bride has dated is the bride’s fault. So your family is in the red on both accounts.
edgiepower
A mate got remarried recently. I was the only member of the party invited back from the first wedding, and only one of a few guests overall, most being family. I was under STRICT INSTRUCTION to not mention the first wedding in any capacity.
Theslootwhisperer
When my ex got remarried she called me to invite me and also to ask me a favor. I'm like yeah, anything. She asked me not to go. I've known here since the mid 90s. We have an adult daughter together and I'm still in good terms with her family (although they're in Europe and I'm in Canada) and obviously we're still friend.
So she didn't want to hurt my feelings by not inviting me but if I did show up inevitably her family would inquire how I'm doing, people I don't know would ask who I am etc. And it would basically be distracting. So of course I said I didn't mind. Just happy to be of service (and not having to spend 3000$ to go to a wedding in Europe).
sail3r
Getting banned from large family events sounds like a perk not a punishment ?
ISlicedI
Who talks about a bride/grooms ex at their wedding...?
Sunbear86
Having an open mic at a wedding is such a bad idea lol. It usually starts off with awkward silence as people weren't aware of the planned open mic and therefore are not prepared, until you get some overly confident drunken relative come up and give some rambling speech, or in this case a bad joke.
gohan1739
Why is an ex partner at the wedding. That in my opinion is a red flag that the bride is inviting an ex to her wedding.
WidowedWTF
Nah, what didn't land was the bride's decision to invite ex to the wedding without informing groom of their history. That isn't on you. Don't let them misplace the responsibility here.
majesticmooses
I’m not going to lie bro, that’s 100 percent on you. I don’t even think you learned your lesson; it’s not “alcohol and microphones don’t mix”, you should know not to bring up an ex at a wedding speech just like you should know not to cheat on your girl when you’re drunk.
You just don’t do that. All I’m saying is you should spend some time contemplating why that was upsetting in different ways for quite a few different people, rather than just landing on “welp shouldnt’a drank so much oops”