Bride baffled when woman tries to do 'investment presentation' at wedding. AITA?
'WIBTA for uninviting a guest to my wedding because of her request?'
My fiance and I are getting married in the UK, and I decided to invite an old friend of mine from when I used to live in North America. When I was following up with the RSVPs and checking if she would be coming to the wedding, she told me that she has actually just moved to Dubai.
She said that she is pretty busy with the move, and juggling a baby, a new job selling real estate and planning a potential wedding a month before mine. I was a little taken aback that she didn't inform me about her wedding either, but she said it was a smaller affair.
So that's fine I guess. She said she would then get back to me later on whether she was still planning to come to mine.
A few days later, she reached out and said that she should be able to come to my wedding in the UK. We also got to talking about her move to Dubai and she explained that she wanted to save on income tax, and inheritance tax which were the major factors for her move.
She then said that UK citizens are the 2nd highest investors for Dubai properties and then asked if she could do a presentation on selling Dubai properties.
I was in denial about what she was asking? And clarified if she meant that she wanted to do a presentation at some real estate conference at the same time when she came for my wedding? But she was actually asking for 5 minutes to do her presentation to MY GUESTS at MY WEDDING and said she would offer me commission if anyone bought her Dubai apartments!
I was shocked at the time and didn't know how to respond. My first reply to her was 'I don't think that would be appropriate. Maybe you can talk to a few people there if you want who may be likely to buy'. After which, she said that she will need to make the trip in that case.
After a day of processing the ridiculous request she made, I then sent her a text and told her not to even talk about this to any of my guests if she were to come, as I don't want her harrassing my other guests with her sales pitch during the wedding. She agreed and said she understands.
However, I still don't feel comfortable with the fact that her initial objective was to sell apartments at my wedding and I really don't want her coming now.
The wedding is in 3 months and she's missed the RSVP deadline and hasn't RSVP'd yet. And we haven't spoken about it since. Hence, would I be the a**hole if I told her definitely not to come anymore? I also feel really awkward and bad about straight up uninviting her.
Here are the top comments in response to the post:
NTA, simply write the RSVP deadline has passed and I've given my guest total to the venue. We can catch up another time, and delete the text exchange. It'll most likely be the last interaction you two have.
NTA. This might be the strangest and most outrageous weird-wedding-guest-behaviors story I've ever seen here.
NTA; and also, she’s missed the RSVP deadline so you have a cast-iron excuse to tell her she can’t come now as the final numbers are in. Your wedding is not a business opportunity for her — it’s your wedding. That was very tacky of her.
NTA - She missed the RSVP deadline, so you don't have to 'uninvite her', you can assume she is not coming. If she does try to RSVP, you can politely tell her than unfortunately since the deadline has passed you are no longer able to increase the headcount at the venue.
Pro tip - if you have a block of rooms at hotel for your guests, ask the hotel to notify you if she books a room. If so, reach out to her and use the phrasing above.
And - no, you are not the AH for wanting to uninvite her. Her request so far outside of social norms that I question her mental well being.
NTA. There is no way she will stick to the agreement if she comes to your wedding. You can guarantee that she would be there clutching an iPad so she can show absolutely everybody the properties she is trying to sell. To have the gall to ask to be able to do this on your wedding day shows she has absolutely no respect for you or what the day is really about.