Woman asks if she's wrong for taking back offer to photograph entitled friend's wedding.
Beggars can't be choosers, but entitled bridezillas seem to find a way.
Reddit user u/VioletsAndLily offered to help her friend out of a jam and photograph her wedding for free for a certain number of hours. However, that wasn't good enough for this entitled bride-to-be.
Now, this photographer is asking the internet, 'AITA (Am I The A**hole) for taking back my offer to help with my friend’s wedding?
She writes:
Last year, my friend Jess (35f) finally got engaged to the man she’s been dating for the past 15 years. We live in a high-cost-of-living city, and Jess’ finances have always been very tight.
Her wedding budget was $5000. It’s workable, since she works in catering and has connections, and her fiancé’s family has a house with a big yard.
I offered to take pictures for free. I’m an amateur photographer with the basic gear and a background in photojournalism. I’m not going to be hired to shoot for Martha Stewart Weddings, but I would have provided some nice pictures.
Jess turned me down, citing my lack of a wedding portfolio. I thought that maybe she or her fiancé had access to someone with more experience, and I ignored her unusually snotty tone when she said thanks but no thanks.
Fast forward to last Thursday. Jess calls me in tears because she does not have a photographer. Neither she nor her fiancé knows anyone else, and she doesn’t want to count on guests’ camera photos. She asked if I can take pictures.
I was more than happy to do so at the wedding and reception, but she wanted me to shoot the whole day: her getting ready, traveling to the venue, the wedding ceremony, and her and her fiancé leaving the reception.
I said I had other commitments that morning, but reiterated that I could show up an hour before the wedding to get some before shots and take photos at the ceremony and reception, including the usual posed photos (family, wedding party, etc).
She said I could either take photos for the entire day or not bother even coming to the wedding as a guest. She got married this past Saturday. I wasn’t there. AITA
It's always sad to lose a friend, but sometimes it's for the best. Who wants a friend who disses and dismisses them in this way? It sounds like this wedding photographer really dodged a bullet with this entitled bride.
Reddit users agreed, that she's not 'The A**hole.' With friends like these, who needs enemies?
From ahdrielle
NTA. She just wanted to use you as a last resort. She didn't consider your feelings or life at all. I don't think Jess is a friend to you.
From This_Cauliflower1986
NTA. You know now where you stand. Do the whole day for free or not at all. Wow. Congratulations for standing up for yourself. Just think of the lack of gratitude and criticism of the pictures you would have taken. You dodged a bullet. I’m so sorry.
From Electrical-Date-3951
'Spend the entire day bending over backwards for me, or you can't spend only part of the day bending over backwards for me!' 😂😂😂😂
I agree. This was no friend at all. OP offered a great kindness to Jess. She turned her nose up at the offer then came back to OP at the last minute when she realized that a professional wedding photographer would eat up most of her $5k budget.
Jess treated OP like 'the help' and clearly didn't value her friendship or having OP celebrate the day with her. I am almost certain that had OP done the photos, this would not have been a fun experience.
From jrm1102
NTA, she looked a gift horse in the mouth.
From CharliesBadDay
NTA. She gave you a horrible ultimatum and you just chose one of her options.
From pfashby
NTA. Quite the entitled bride there. You made the right choice, she seems like the type who would complain about her free pictures.
From anon466544
NTA. Wow. You offered to help her but she showed you what kind of a friend she is. Rescinding your invite because you couldn’t shoot the whole wedding at the last minute is such an AH move, I would consider this
From Aggravating_Ad9046
NTA. Talk about a choosy beggar bridezilla 🙄