17-year-old girl asks, 'WIBTA if I reported a co-worker for tickling my side?' Updated!
This just happened today and I’m not sure how to react. This is my (17 F) first job and this has never happened to me before. Also, I’m on mobile so I apologize for that.
I work at a local grocery store. I only started a month and a half ago. Most of the people there are friendly, but one of my co-workers seemed more friendly than the others. He’s an older guy who has been there for years. Earlier today, while I was clocking out and getting my things, he came up to me and tickled my side while I was bent over.
He didn’t grab my boob or anything and it only lasted for about two seconds. It did make me feel uncomfortable however.
My family thinks that he was just being overly friendly and I should’ve told him there, but I was in shock and surprised. I also have anxiety and don’t like conflict.
I’m thinking about calling my Human Resources manager and telling her about it. Just saying that it made me uncomfortable and I wanted a paper trail just in case something else happens. However, I would feel bad if he got fired over this and I don’t wanna be seen as a trouble maker. Plus, I don’t want everyone mad at me.
So what I’m asking is if I would be the AH if I talked to the HR manager about it?
Here's what advice people had for OP:
Significant-Market-6 writes:
NTA. He knows that this is completely inappropriate, and he’s hoping you’re young/new/whatever enough not to call him out on it.
tfhaenodreirst writes:
NTA. You have a pretty strong case and you don’t have to listen to your family; his intent doesn’t really matter.
DoggoandKitty_Lover OP responded:
They’re encouraging me to confront him or tell the manager, but I’m scared of causing a scene.
Odd-Increase writes:
How big is this company? National chain or just one local store? Is your HR just some dude that does hiring in the store you physically work at or is there more of a corporate infrastructure.
If the company is encouraging you to talk to the guy, then they are condoning his behavior by forcing you to handle something that is absolutely their responsibility to take seriously and resolve.
If there is a larger corporate entity than just the staff in your store you need to be going up that chain.
This is predatory behavior, no question. That fact that you are a minor makes this an especially horrible situation the company should be taking seriously.
I’m sorry this has to be your first experience in the working world.
DoggoandKitty_Lover OP responded:
It’s semi-big, since the company has about 1,000 chains in four states. The HR for my store is just one lady who does the hiring. The company isn’t encouraging me to confront him. My family is. Like go up to him and just tell him that it was uncomfortable and not to do it again.
Financial_Singer_786 writes:
No definitely NTA. You don’t deserve to be uncomfortable at a place of work. I’m surprised your family isn’t backing you up.
DoggoandKitty_Lover OP responded:
They are, but they won’t do anything without my say on the matter. So it’s more of “I’ll follow your lead”. My dad wants to go down and yell at him lol.
PurpleBrevity writes:
He is testing the waters to see what he can get away with. 100%. He’s seeing if she’s too uncomfortable to do anything and he can escalate his game. I’ve been through this one...the tickle is wildly inappropriate and just his warm up act. When you call him on it he gets to say he was being playful or some crap and didn’t mean anything by it.
SolitaireOG writes:
I'm 52 years old and the father of three amazing daughters. If my youngest, who is seventeen years old, told me this exact story, I'd be saying what your father did - and a little more. The old Marine in me definitely comes out!
Update from OP:
Told HR about it, they said that they were gonna talk to him about it, but the person basically defended him so I don’t think anything’s gonna happen.
Do you think she did the right thing, and if so, should she just leave it there, or make sure there are consquences?