Someecards Logo
'AITA for not wanting to work with coworker who took pics of me with my extramarital partner?' UPDATED

'AITA for not wanting to work with coworker who took pics of me with my extramarital partner?' UPDATED


In general, it's nice to keep work separate from your home life. But that's a lot harder to do when you have nosy coworkers.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a man asked if he was wrong for going to HR after his coworker sent a bunch of pictures of him to his wife. He wrote:

"AITAH for not wanting to work with coworker who followed me and took pictures of me with my extramarital partner?"

So first off I never cheated on my wife. We have an open marriage. We each have our own extramarital partners that we see together and/or by ourselves. My coworkers all know I’m married as wife accompanies me to work events, but they did not know about our open marriage. A few months ago my wife told me she got sent a bunch of pictures from my coworker, Jordan.

The pictures are of me when I was on a date with another woman. My wife knows about this partner and knew about us being out that date, so she was not surprised at all, but found the whole thing funny. I however was a little weirded out. I could understand maybe taking a picture or two. But based on the pictures Jordan would have had to been following us for 5+ hours.

To the point where she must have followed us in a car to multiple locations as well as waited outside the hotel room the whole time. That just creeped me out. After explaining that to my wife she agreed it was a little creepy. Jordan and I usually work together fairly frequently, but I didn’t feel comfortable working with her anymore. So I decided to talk to HR about it and Jordan was put on other projects.

The other projects Jordan got put on aren’t as good as the projects I’m on. So now Jordan is upset because she thinks I’ve derailed her career (which honestly may be true) when all she was doing was trying to look out for my wife. She thinks what she did was reasonable considering no one knew about me and my wife’s open marriage.

Once everything was explained I should have gotten over it and she shouldn’t get punished for doing the right thing. I still don’t feel comfortable working with her though. Kind of even less than before since I feel like she’s so hostile now.

Redditors jumped on to share their thoughts.

Existing_Can319 wrote:

NTA if someone took a picture of me with another partner and sent it to my primary partner it could be overlooked as just looking out for them. But this person took many pictures and followed you to different locations for 5+ hours. That is beyond excessive and would make most people uncomfortable.

Playful-Natural-4626 wrote:

Stalking, it’s called stalking.

Magdovus wrote:

To be clear- have you confirmed that Jordan followed you and it wasn't just a coincidence that she saw you on your date?*

OP responded:

It would have been impossible for her not to have followed us based on the pictures she took. Like I said in my post there were pictures taken at multiple locations we had gone that night.

These locations were miles apart. I can also tell based on our state of dress the difference of the pictures of us going into the hotel room versus the ones of us coming out, which was several hours later. It wasn’t just a couple pictures of us that she took when she happened upon us.

Adventurous-travel1 wrote:

She created a hostile workplace. Even if it was after work she stalked you and sent the pictures. This was HR choice so it doesn’t matter what she thinks. People have a right not to talk about private matters.

One-Awareness3671 wrote:

NTA, you really need to stay away from Jordan. Why is she stalking you? I think she may have feelings for you, and took this as an opportunity to get you separated from your wife, so she could comfort you and move in. No other reason why someone would stalk you. Or I could just have a wild imagination.

A few weeks later, OP jumped on with an update:

So a thing happened with a new coworker yesterday. When making introductions Jordan decided to bring up my open marriage. Which was super awkward and weird. I ended up going back to HR about it at the end of the day. They had already gotten other comments from some other employees about it and said right away that it was inappropriate and they would be taking disciplinary action.

When I came in to work today I found out Jordan was let go. Funny little thing I heard from someone else was that she apparently had tried to defend herself by saying she was just trying to be helpful by making sure the new employee was clearly informed and didn’t misunderstand things like her.

Commenters were quick to share their responses.

lazygerm wrote:

I just read your original post...Wow. Even if she was a supreme busybody (or a blackmailer); that's really crazy to follow you and your other partner for five hours. I'm glad she's out of your hair, but I would be on my guard around my home/work and other places I go.

ensuene wrote:

I’m glad you don’t have to work with her anymore but my dude get yourself security cameras if don’t already have them.

Princess-Makayla wrote:

It's weird that someone would f#$k around, find out and then decide to f#$k around again.

Organized_Khaos wrote:

OP’s personal life situation really took up some serious real estate in Jordan’s head. Even when the denouement didn’t go down like she thought - wife was okay, other coworkers knew and ignored, and when HR had punished her - she doubled down and became completely obsessed to the point where it negatively affected her life. Why TF did she care so much?

countingrussellcrows wrote:

That woman’s behaviour is weird and bizarre. That being said, I have also had coworkers who would 100% do the same thing and see nothing wrong with.

Hopefully, this is the last of Jordan that OP and his wife have to see.

© Copyright 2024 Someecards, Inc

Featured Content