Reddit user shares hilarious cover letter for dishwashing job.
It doesn't really matter if this was actually submitted or not, it's an enjoyable read for anyone who's had to apply for a job, especially one they barely even want.
On Reddit user sugartrouts shared this letter for a dishwasher job application. We hope he got the job, or a better one doing comedy writing.
To Whom It May Concern:
I am writing in hopes to be considered for the dishwashing position at your establishment. The noble occupation of dishwashing is an art which I am not only trained and educated in, but am also devoutly passionate about.
It was, perhaps, the talking and singing plates in Disney's Beauty and the Beast that first sparked my lifelong fascination with dishwashing. My enchantment with the careful cleaning of cups, bowls and plates only grew as I came into adolescence.
Knowing I wanted to pursue a career in the field, I began a college education fiercely dedicated to the intricacies and nuances of the art.
In my four years of intensive dishwashing study, my eyes were opened to the endless knowledge and technique one must acquire to achieve dishwashing mastery.
The subtle variations in torque one must apply when switching between glass and ceramic, the shift in faucet-hose angle required when rinsing a serving spoon, the vast array of finger positions one can use to maneuver a washcloth into every corner and crevice of even the most oddly shaped novelty cups...to conquer this mysterious and beautiful art became my sole aspiration.
This is why I believe my employment at your restaurant would yield great benefit to both of us. I can continue to explore the many fascinating schools of thought on dishwashing, and your customers can appreciate the care and love I bestow on each, individual piece of dishware and cutlery.
I almost consider the dishes to be clients themselves, and the dishwashing process akin to a luxury spa. Under my practice, each plate is shown into an environment of great positivity, physical care, and cleanliness. It is, for me, a deeply personal and heartfelt process, and I believe this love and dedication can be felt in every bite one takes from a dish that has been washed within my care.
For these many reasons, I strongly implore you to consider the multitude of ways our lives and professions can be enriched by making me one of your dishwashing staff.
In summary,
pay me and i'll wash your f*cking dishes
Here are some of the top responses:
Ok but in all seriousness can i pay you to write cover letters for me?
Didn't think I'd find my big laugh of the day in a post about a cover letter but here we are. Thank you lmao.
Honestly, you could make money just selling cover letters.