Woman tells coworker to 'f off' after she says 'you're single because of your hobbies.'

Few things will make you question your own judgment and sanity quite like having a crew of people side with the person you defended yourself against. Luckily, an army of internet commenters is always ready to share their opinions.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she was wrong for telling her coworker to "f off" after being told it's her fault she's single. She wrote:

"AITA for telling coworker to f off after she said 'this is why you’re single.'"

I (F32) work as an interpreter (don’t worry when you see my atrocious grammar, I don’t interpret from/to English, it’s my third language). One of my work colleagues, Hannah (F, late 30s) asked me the other day what my plans for the weekend were. I replied that I was going to the woods with my club to sh00t some arrows and I had ballet class on Sunday.

She was taken aback at that and asked me “how many hobbies do you f*$king have?” Swearing is something she does a lot so it didn’t sound any alarm bells in my head so I replied that a few. She heard me speak about my classes before when I was asked about evening plans or when I said no to going to a pub after work.

Despite my reply, she wouldn’t drop it and wanted me to list all the classes I do. So I told her that I took Italian classes, ballet beginners classes, archery, pan flute classes, and swimming. She asked, what about your volunteering, did you stop that. I said no, I still do it twice a week. And that’s when she said “this is why you’re single.”

That surprised me. I’ve never complained about being single, I’m quite content with that so I don’t know where that came from. I asked her about that and she just said I’m trying to relieve my high school days and no guy would want a woman that runs around in the woods with arrows and then pounces like a child in a tutu in adult beginners ballet class.

Could I have been more polite? Sure, but she annoyed me. I told her to “f off” and I left the room. Now, she’s telling everyone what an AH I am and that she was only trying to give me advice because I’m immature and will be single forever if I don’t get my s#$t together.

It’s been almost a week and now, she’s got some of the ladies on her side and they’re side eyeing me, one even twirled like a ballerina (badly) behind my back as I was leaving the lunch room. With so many people agreeing with her, I need to double-check if I was right to tell her what I did. Did I overreact, was I the AH in the situation? AITA?

The internet was fully with OP on this.

SageGreen98 wrote:

NTA but she IS creating a hostile work environment. She doesn't get to decide how YOU live your life, then get offended by your telling her, in effect, to mind her own business. Yes, you told her to f off, but as aggressive as she was being, it doesn't sound like she would have taken anything less than your being blunt and saying what you said.

You need to report this to your Human Resources department or file a complaint about her creating hostility at work because of an exchange she PUSHED, then she assumed you didn't like being single, (she's probably one of those people who think the whole damn world needs to pair up and have a romantic partner).

And now SHE is having others demean you, tease and mock you for LIVING YOUR F#$KING LIFE. That is SERIOUSLY messed up behavior and she needs some serious consequences for starting s#$t at work and continuing to stir the pot and then, bring in other coworkers to help her stir that s#$t cauldron of hostility and b*llying.

owls_and_cardinals wrote:

NTA, what a weird situation. Your coworker was soooo out of line, and I wouldn't trust that she is even conveying it accurately to your other coworkers. Still it's super odd that they are all essentially making fun of you now and I'd consider that a hostile work environment - you should consider bringing this to HR. It sounds t0xic.

mxcmpsx wrote:

NTA. OP go to HR and file a complaint. She’s starting a hostile work environment and overstepped.

itsshakespeare wrote:

NTA. Normal people (not bitter/insecure/envious ones) would say something along the lines of wow, how do you fit all that in? You make me feel so lazy!

MindTraveler48 wrote:

NTA. This co-worker is employing juvenile mean-girl tactics, which is highly unprofessional and disruptive to the work environment. I agree with others, report this to HR. I recommend writing it out in a factual, objective report of the details, including the language used by both. Get ahead for this before she decides to blindside you by reporting you first.

OP is definitely NTA here, she's working with some deeply immature people.