12 'crazy' exes explain their side of the story. Spoiler alert: they're not the crazy ones.

12 'crazy' exes explain their side of the story. Spoiler alert: they're not the crazy ones.
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The worst thing a guy can ever do to a woman is call her the c-word.

Once you call a woman crazy, there is really nothing she can say after that that won't make her seem even more crazy.

Nevertheless, these so-called crazy exes have taken to Reddit to try to clear their names. And if there is once takeaway we can get from these stories, its that most guys who end up dating "crazy girls" usually do so because they made them that way.

1. yesjesshero claims it was probably his constant cheating that made her a controlling bitch.

His side:

He told all of his family and friends that I asked for a divorce because he was deploying to Afghanistan and that I was a crazy controlling bitch.

Her side:

The real reason we were divorcing was because he was texting girls he met online and telling them he loved them and wanted to be with them. I also found his online dating site on my laptop and when I confronted him about it he said his friends made the profile as a joke. The profile used the same user name and password that he used for everything. The final straw was when I came home from a trip back home to see my family and walked into our bedroom to find another girls clothes. I asked whose they were and why they were there and he said he had gone to the bar with some people from his troop and she was too drunk and had to spend the night. He apparently slept on the couch. I asked what she left the apartment wearing and he gave her my favorite pair of sweatpants to wear home. I never got those back either.

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Get those sweatpants back, girl.

2. itsfoine tells of how she found out her roommate wasn't just a victim.

His side:

My roommate had a "crazy ex" who would call him 20 times and leave five voicemails a day. This had been going on for about a week or so and I asked him if he had ever listened to the voicemails or called her back and he said "fuck no she is just being crazy as shit"

Her side:

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The following week I talked to her roommate and asked why she was calling him so much. It was because he had he taken her virginity and she wanted it back.

Well besides that, the actual reason was that the night they broke up he apparently went to her house, took a bat, and smashed all her windows and slashed all her tires. Never knew my roommate was broken up so hard by it nor had the anger to go and actually act on

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3. LionPandaTiger dealt with a gaslighting monster. Everyone who wants to know what gaslighting is, this anecdote sums it up perfectly.

His side:

People would say (in retrospect) perfectly friendly things to me and I would think they were being passive aggressive or messing with me in some way. End result: I looked like a crazy bitch who took offense at everything and he looked like a long-suffering good guy.

Her side:

I had an emotionally abusive ex who would act perfectly sweet in front of everyone but would always say something to me privately, or even whisper to me while we were surrounded by people. It was always about how everyone else didn't like me, was disgusted by my joke, etc, or sometimes just that I looked bad in some way. It made me extremely neurotic and hypersensitive.

This is the only time I did any crazy ex stuff to him and of course it just reinforced our mutual friends' view of me, but I felt much better.

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4. vaevictis037 acknowledges it takes crazy to date crazy.

We're definitely each other's crazy exes. We just were very passionate people who fell for each other hard, and everything we did was intense. The sex, the arguments, the cold shouldering, etc.

Eventually distance became a factor and cheating accusations ran rampant and we basically made each other crazy until we broke up months later

5. murderousbudgie seemed like the wacko who couldn't get over a guy.

His side:

Bet I sounded like a crazy ex when I warned his next girlfriend what an abusive asshole he was....

Her side:

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...but it sure as hell felt good when I found out she dumped him a year or so later for just that reason.

6. ambivalent_graffiti's story is really intense. The next time some guy calls his gf a nutjob, make sure she's OK.

His side:

He [told] everyone that I was a nutjob, I was clingy, I wasn't adventurous in bed, and that I had the audacity to just move out without telling him and make him pay all the rent.

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Her side:

He is extraordinarily manipulative. When we started dating he would ask me to come over every night, never wanting to not have me around. Within 2 months of dating, he asked me to move in with him. Naturally, I thought this meant that he was really serious about me, and since I didn't really know what love was, I assumed I was in love with him.

So we moved in together and his true side came out. He would assault me on a regular basis- like he hit me a lot and he would rape me. I didn't think it was rape then because I loved him, but he was violently and aggressively raping me. I told him that I didn't like it when he did that and he said it was his fetish and he wouldn't want to have sex with me otherwise. I was essentially always crying and covered in bruises.

He told me every single day that I was worthless and no one would ever love me, and I 100% believed him. He would cheat on me at our home, loudly, and then tell me it was because I wasn't attractive enough for him. I would have random breakdowns at work, couldn't handle social interactions, dropped out of school, and eventually tried to kill myself. I tried to cut my wrists in the bathtub, but our plumbing was always fucked and I couldn't get a full tub of hot water - it was probably less than tepid- so I didn't bleed out fast enough. When he came home I was unconscious but not dead, he pulled me out, slapped me awake, and told me that I was so useless I couldn't even do that right and jsut left the house.

I don't know why, but that hit some kind of a switch in my brain and I called a good friend of mine (who I hadn't spoken to in months because my ex had made it impossible for me to socialize) and told him to come get me. When he showed up and saw me, he started packing all of my stuff into his car and moved me out of the apartment that night. I have never spoken to my ex again.

HEY RYAN YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU SOCIOPATHIC TWAT.

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7. AuntyDotal had a client who seemed like an unappreciative homewrecker.

His side:

I know her ex's friends call her the crazy ex. As a couple, they were together almost 30 years. Very conservative, religious, and he had a great banking job and she was a stay-at-home mom who volunteered for the church. Nice house, great kids, decent American cars. Just really great on the surface.

After 28 years, all the kids are grown, she got a job at a little boutique designing -- what's it called? The sports leisure clothing that's suddenly so popular? Yoga pants and whatnot. Anyway, she gets a job, it barely pays anything, but then she files for divorce.

The minute she files for divorce, everyone turns on her. You're not supposed to get divorced in their religion, and how crazy is she, she's got a husband with a good job and a nice house and she's leaving all that? What?! She said she ran into one of her ex's friends, and he started shouting at her that she RUINED her ex, she's a fucking bitch, she should die and go to hell, etc. His wife is pulling him away and saying, "Honey, don't, the crazy bitch isn't worth it."

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Her side:

It turns out that all this time, her husband has been a miser. That might not seem so bad on the surface, but he was a horrible miser. Washing the aluminum foil to re-use it. They washed the foil many times over before they'd throw it away or recycle it. A little bit of recycling is fine. Re-using it 'til it's falling apart is not reasonable.] Didn't go to the doctor. Wouldn't get braces for the kids because it was too expensive. No vacations, no pets, no luxuries of any kind. The reason she knows how to design is because she had to sew everything in their house. The reason she got into running was because it was the only activity she could do that was free.

Now, they have the nice house and the decent cars, ... not once cent of debt... and tons of savings and retirement accounts. The guy's been socking away money for years and telling his wife that she's nothing but a bloody drain on his resources. No way will he pay for the kids' college funds.

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But fortunately...

The courts believe a non-working spouse's donations to the marital estate are as good as an employed spouse's donations to the estate. So client gets half the savings, half the value of the nice house, half the retirement account, and she gets a little alimony for a few years.

First thing she does is go out and rescue a mutt.

Every time I see her, she looks happier and happier. She's going to be OK. Her clothing line is starting to take off.

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8. imhereforthemeta is another victim of cheating-induced insecurity.

His side:

I was touted as a "crazy ex" once. He said I was too attached, whiny, all of that shit.

Her side:

I've never been that way really, but he would be really distant with me and then get drunk or something and cry and tell me how much he loved me, so I was constantly getting sent mixed signals and it was honestly driving me crazy. He would also hang out with his really attractive ex a lot, who dumped him, who (as far as I know) he never really got over. But I was "fine with it" because if he was super vulnerable, it would be all "I love you, you mean so much to me". Also the dude who took my virginity, so that was super weird. He just generally brought out a lot insecurity in me that manifested in some crappy and pathetic ways.

Turns out he was cheating on me with his ex, random girls, and one of my best friends. So yeah, I was whiny, needy, had frequent emotional outbursts...even after finding out a lot of that shit I still begged him to take me back for like, a week. Luckily, this experience taught me a lot about self respect.

I am now pretty skeptical when guys say they have a "crazy ex" unless she's really done something crazy. Some people can really be awful, but I also see many cases of people really being driven crazy temporarily by getting manipulated.

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9. spiderlanewales is the only guy on here who was the "crazy" one. He acknowledges he was terrible, but gives some insight why.

Her side:

I turned into the crazy, controlling boyfriend that every girl seems to encounter at one point or another. I wanted to know where she was, who she was with, etc, at all times, was she drinking, how old were the people she was with? Just all kinds of crazy, manipulative shit. It took me about three months after the breakup to come to terms with the fact that I was a huge douchebag to her, I was "that guy" that she will probably tell everyone who will listen about because he was insane.

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His side:

She cheated on me several times, at least three different guys that I know about, anyway, and I made the colossal mistake of forgiving her each time. I had self confidence issues and figured that, if I let her go, I was letting go of the last pretty girl who'd ever want me.

I finally broke up with her, as even through all of this, she absolutely wouldn't break up with me, because more manipulative shit: As long as she was home, I was an absolute angel to her. I wasn't even aware that I was doing that one.

I ended up in a new relationship three years later, and it was great. Lasted 2.5 years and we broke up amiably due to life stuff we couldn't really control, but I am happy to say i've never been "that guy" again.

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10. ampersandie only went "crazy" after her boyfriend refused to let her call him her boyfriend.

His side:

He would talk shit about me to his friends because of how crazy I was.

Her side:

He was a clinical narcissist. He kept me strung along our entire "relationship". Wouldn't call me his girlfriend, but treated me like one. I would lose my mind whenever he would talk to other girls/hang out with them, because he would say, "You're not my girlfriend. Shut up." This would sometimes happen right after a date. Whenever I would try and shut him out, he'd call me crying and I really liked him, so I took him back. But it would keep happening. He'd buy me gifts, take me out multiple times a week, do all the things boyfriends/girlfriends did but he would never acknowledge our relationship. So in turn, I got crazier and crazier, because he drove me crazy. He would talk shit about me to his friends because of how crazy I was, completely disregarding the manipulative shit he was doing. I've never had anyone mess with my head so much.

Now I'm married to an amazing man who was courteous, loving and mature from day one. Never once with this man have I ever worried about fidelity, or questioned my status with him. I was never "crazy" with him because he gave me no reason to be. My view of relationships was so skewed, I had no idea that I would ever be worthy of someone I have now.

Last I heard from my narcissist ex, he kept trying to call and text me and I had been dating my boyfriend (now husband) for a year already. He told me I would have made a good girlfriend. Yeah, I turns out I did make a good girlfriend, for someone who deserved it.

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11. RedTrailWildcat admits she was the crazy girlfriend, but that was because she actually had an undiagnosed mental disorder.

His side:

He was my only friend and when we broke up it devastated me. I started to make stuff up to keep him talking to me.

Her side:

This isn't something I usually tell people...but here it goes.

We dated when I was 17-18. had a undiagnosed mental disorder, which caused me to dissociate a lot. I lived in a severely abusive household and I wasn't allowed out ever- so I had to sneak out to see him. My parents were controlling and emotionally abusive. I was always grounded. It just made me full on crazy. He was my only friend and when we broke up it devastated me. I started to make stuff up to keep him talking to me. I faked being sick just to guilt him into talking to me. I eventually got out of that household, stopped talking to him (despite finally apologizing and admitting I was wrong.). I went to college where they have free counseling, and I got diagnosed with PTSD. I am much better now that I'm 22, and in December I will be graduating with a degree in psychology.

As for him? Well, I don't know. But wherever he is I hope he's happy.

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12. And one last one, from showmebevelle, who has an airtight case against being the crazy one in her relationship.

His side:

He told our home town I was some crazy stalker bitch and they believed him. When I finally dumped him, he threatened to send my nudes to my parents and my boss.

Her side:

I was 14 and he was 20.

Say no more; that dude better be in jail.

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