One group of people who may not be suffering as much from the wave of COVID-era wedding cancellations is bridesmaids. Of course, being a bridesmaid can be a fun and rewarding experience. But it can also be a very expensive and demanding form of Hell. It all depends on the bride and where she falls on the scale of 'super chill bride' to 'full-blown bridezilla.'
1.) From cats_in_tiny_shoes:
She wanted to have two bachelorette parties, both of which involved flying, Airbnbs, etc. The first (Nashville) I was excited about and had been in the works for some time. Why the second? Oh, well, it was a re-do because she had a horrible time at the first!
She cried and missed her fiance the whole time; decided she hated country music and therefore Nashville; was upset that it snowed in Nashville when she thought it was swimsuit weather; and finally sobbed and laid down in the middle of the street after finding out while we were in Nashville, her fiance, my then-boyfriend, and the other guys went to a casino for the weekend.
This meant that he was having two bachelor parties now, and this somehow made Nashville not a 'true' bachelorette weekend (not sure that logic tracks) so we needed to plan her another one.
At first I felt bad, because she was so anxious and so stressed and no one likes feeling that way when traveling. So we plan a second bachelorette weekend, this time to Chicago a month later, where one of the bridesmaids lives. All excited, I love Chicago.
We get there ... and she spends the whole time crying and missing her fiance; deciding she hates snow and therefore Chicago; and finally sobbing and laying down in the middle of the street because no one told our waiter it was her special weekend. Yay.
2.) From Cat_Biscuit:
I don’t know if this qualifies but for a wedding I’m in this summer the bride wanted to have that whole mismatched bridesmaid dress aesthetic without giving the bridesmaids (there’s 7 of us) the option of actually choosing our own dresses.
So what she did was choose seven dresses, send a photo collage of the dresses in a group chat, and have us duke it out via text as to who would get what dress. It was so awkward and hostile. I only know a few of the other bridesmaids, and I had no interest in arguing with strangers over text as to what dress I was going to wear.
So I just kept quiet and took whatever was assigned to me.
Luckily I like the dress I got, but the whole thing was like a bizarre social experiment gone wrong.
3.) From tomatopotatotomato:
I was the maid of honor and the bride called me telling me she wanted me to throw her a party in Vegas. I told her I couldn't afford it. She pressured me for a long time about it. Then I threw her a pretty great party in a nice big city closer to our hometown and spent hundreds of dollars and she sighed and said, 'yeah this was pretty good, but I wish it was Vegas.'
Edit: I lost about 10 pounds from stress that year. People asked me if I had a disease or what was wrong. In the pictures, the size 0 dress from David's Bridal is just about falling off my skeletal frame.
Now I'm working on how to say no to toxic people. What shocked me about her request for Vegas was a year earlier her friend made her go to a bachelorette party in Vegas and that bride was a bridezilla who put everyone through hell.
My friend had to spend like $3000 dollar for a luxury penthouse hotel and pay $20 covers to go to clubs where if you asked for a water they sold you a $30 bottle of designer water. It sounded like hell. She would call and complain to me about it during this time. Lo and behold a year later she gets engaged and calls me and asks me point blank to throw her party in Vegas.
She was in my wedding a few years earlier and I was the most thoughtful and accommodating bride. I let my bridesmaids pick their dresses from the cheapest selection and never asked a thing from them. Now I just feel nothing toward her.
4.) From dahliafluffy:
Ex-SIL was bridezilla. She wanted both a bachelorette party AND a bridesmaids weekend at the spa with multiple activities (chocolate making, fancy champagne bar outing, supper) for which we were expected to foot her part of the bill.
As I was a poor graduate student at the time, I offered to contribute to my share of the brides cost for the weekend and not attend myself. Ended up getting fired as bridesmaid a week before the wedding.
5.) From horsetailfeathers:
She wanted us to purchase matching necklaces.
Sounded just fine and normal... until we found out it was overpriced garbage from her sister’s MLM jewelry business (she was one of the bridesmaids too!). It was her idea and she convinced the bride to go with her jewelry in order to promote the business - which included promoting it to us, of course 🙄
I didn’t buy anything from her, but she really turned on the sales pressure and it was an awkward 30 minutes. Thankfully, the bride completely forgot about the idea and I found a similar necklace from Forever 21. Wore that in the wedding.
6.) From TintarellaDiLuna:
Was invited to the bachelorette party... five days in advance. Of course nobody could make it, so they rescheduled. A couple of the bridesmaids put together a camping weekend, bought EVERYTHING we needed, and then the bride decided she wanted a hotel party at the very last minute. $200 a person with only a few days notice?!? I didn’t end up going :(
7.) From JSqueaks:
I helped her DIY her whole wedding, on a budget of like maybe 3k for the entire thing. She wanted a Bridal shower and bachelorette party, all planned by us and paid for by us. that didn't happen because I was a full time student, one was out of state, and one is on disability.
I made 120 Lavender Vanilla votive candles with custom lace and ribbon accents, with dried lavender embedded in the wax.
I made all the bouquets/floral arrangements (she ordered about 500 red and black and white roses from somewhere and they all arrived in boxes and had to be refrigerated in like 4 different locations...) None of them were dethorned or trimmed down properly.
I made half the centerpieces (Her fiance helped me with those)
I hemmed all 3 of the bridesmaids outfits. -I say outfit because it was a corset with a double skirt, the skirts were 6' too long for all of us-
I spent 60% of the weekend keeping her family from killing each other over stupid things completely unrelated to the wedding. Ran interference to keep her grandmother away from her because grandma swore she wasnt going to the wedding and last minute showed up to start drama.
AND I took photos at the reception.
She invited a ton of people and maybe half showed up. It was rough. the bridal party didn't sleep for a solid 2 days before.
I saw her maybe 3 times after the wedding, she's had a baby since and I haven't spoken to her in almost a year.
8.) From kaykito14:
I knew someone who got engaged wanted all her bridesmaids to lose weight. Luckily she didn’t even make it to the alter. But that was rude as f**k.
9.) From sunflowerdress:
I have had a chin-length bob since I met the bride and had to grow my hair to shoulder length because she wanted a vintage look with specific hairstyles. The hair stylist said they could work with my length but it wasn't exactly what the bride wanted so she said no.
10.) From iswearimachef:
My friend is trying to make us row in on a rowboat. In heels and a long dress.
11.) From catty_wampus:
Not me, but a friend. Bride and fiance living in Houston, where my friend lives. My friend is asked to be a bridesmaid. They decide they're getting married in South Carolina where fiance's family lives. Bride also decides the bachelorette party is going to be in Toronto.
My friend being the loyal friend she is went to both. Said in Toronto the bride cried all through dinner, got completely tanked, and passed out by 7pm.
12.) From viralplant:
Wear a hideous orange and red knee length dress with a middle slit so high I couldn’t sit down without flashing. And I was maid of honour so had to help her all evening so had to manage her, her puffy dress, my dress (& my dignity); I was exhausted. When I did get a chance to sit down, I had to hold a bouquet of flowers on my lap to maintain any sense of modesty.
13.) From TheMarkHasBeenMade:
I love my best friend to death but being a part of her wedding party was just expensive. She had a bridal shower with gifts, some sort of “lingerie” gift-giving from everyone going to the bachelorette, stripper and night at a casino for bachelorette party, matching evening gowns for dresses, as well as a wedding gift on top of it all.
14.) From 1radgirl:
I was a bridesmaid for a friend who was a consultant for one of those multi-level marketing beauty companies. So on top of having to buy a very expensive hideous dress, shoes, and jewelry, and having to pay for all my own hair and nail appointments, she made us buy our own “beauty kits” through her company!
This included moisturizer, face wash, as well as an entire face of makeup for the big day, and the brush kit to apply it! All coming in at a cool $299!! That was with her special friends and family discount, of course 🙄 And we still had to pay her friend to actually do our makeup on wedding day, with this makeup we bought.
Oh, and did I forget to mention this was a destination wedding?! Yeah, needless to say i re-evaluated our friendship, determined she wasn’t that good of a friend anyway, and noped out of that nonsense. I don’t need that in my life.
15.) From wheneveriwander:
Best male friend getting married, so asked to be bridesmaid. Bride had THREE showers! One for groom’s side, one for her side, one couples shower. Attendance and gift for each. Registered at top of the line store only, with all designer items on list, nothing under $200.
Then expensive never wear again dress, dyed shoes to match, specific hair ornaments. Wedding was at 4:00 pm, bridesmaids had to be at her house at 8:00 am, so the photographer could shots of every moment of prep for the day. i.e. bride wakes up! MOH applies mascara! MOB cries in every picture.
No lunch, at dinner after wedding, had several drinks from cash bar and got plastered. Two years later, same bride has baby shower. So many gifts from wealthy relatives, she was opening gifts for FIVE HOURS!!! They are now divorced, after she cheated on my friend. Ugh!
16.) From Locomelon:
I'm going to be a bridesmaid in the Fall. The bride wants us to make our own bouquets and centerpiece floral arrangements for the ceremony + reception in an attempt to save money.
She once worked as a cashier for a wholesale flower shop and now believes she has the skills to make her own arrangements. I can already envision staying up the night before assembling stuff.... God I hope she changes her mind....
17.) From Stejness:
We all (3 bridesmaids and a family friend) had to pay $300 each to stay at the homestead venue two nights, because she had to hire the whole venue for exclusive use of the B&B homestead.
.. at the time I was a single mum and lived a 15 minute taxi ride from the venue. I wasn’t a fan of her cheeky tactics to keep her own costs down, but also didn’t want to argue after witnessing a meltdown over someone else saying “no thanks”.
18.) From ConnieC60:
I was forced to get my ears pierced at 13 so I could wear the same earrings as another bridesmaid. Then because I was rail thin and the other bridesmaid was a UK size 16, they padded out my whole dress - padded bodice and about three extra layers in the tulle skirt. This made wearing the dress in July a right ordeal.
19.) From DisloyalMouse:
I’m ginger, I’ve been ginger my whole life, When I was a bridesmaid I was accused of deliberately being ginger to be difficult because all the dress colours the bride wanted looked great on her blonde/brunette bridesmaids and terrible on me.
Then she got upset because some of my tattoos were going to be visible in whatever dress I wore, despite the fact that her sister (and maid of honour) also had a large visible tattoo that no one ever said anything about. Also, kinda like being ginger, the whole time I’d known her I had visible tattoos.