When people are in love (or in like), they tend to do stupid things, like think Green Day lyrics are romantic. Mashable uncovered a trove of such people, who took to Reddit to admit to the most cringeworthy stuff they've ever done for a crush.

All of these people are in rom-com with no happy ending.
All of these people are in rom-com with no happy ending.

A lot of these incidents happened in the childhood years, before people had ample opportunity to learn the difference between cute and creepy. Hopefully, in the time since these incidents occurred, these 17 Redditors have recovered from their moments of shame. Eh, probably not. These are pretty bad.


1. Mr_Nexxus might've had a better chance if he'd gone with the All-American Rejects.

In the eighth grade I printed out Green Day lyrics and wrote "I love you" on the end, then taped them all over her desk and chair.

Somehow, it didn't work out.

2. Mehdysphoria couldn't have fit it all on one page?

I wrote him an essay to confess my love to him. 7 pages worth of cringe.

3. In the end, it all worked out for AtHashtagThrowaway.

She was already in the process of giving me the "thanks but no thanks", and in a bit of desperation I tried serenading her with some sweet No Doubt over the phone.

18 years later and we are happily married... to other people.

4. Hopefully by "little," this guy means five-years-old.

When I was little, I saw Ice Age and there is a scene where Diego wakes up and yawns and since he's a sabertooth, you see his huge awesome chompers.

So, my dumbass would sit in my chair, facing my crush and yawn with a giant open mouth, baring my teeth, hoping to woo in my fair lady. But alas, no luck.

What's the logic behind this idea?
What's the logic behind this idea?

5. Humminbug's crush was unnecessarily harsh.

In middle school I wrote a letter to a boy asking him to go see TMNT with me and my friends. I even had the boxes for him to check yes, no or maybe. He threw it away.

6. Brent0nius faked everything but his love.

When I was 14 I made a fake website for a fake movie to prove to a girl I was starring in a movie.

EDIT: The movie was for a remake of The Thing since the game was popular at the time, the website was purposely vague and mostly just blue text (almost like a viral site) and no, it did not get me laid because she was a lot smarter than I was.


7. Norberthp's friend watched way too many movies growing up.

Not me but my friend had a crush on her neighbor who was playing basketball in the street with his friend. She put on a bikini, dragged a baby pool into her front yard, and took a soapy bath with her dog. The boys kept glancing at her and laughing

She was 13 and I remember watching it unfold from inside and cringing.

8. Halfwoodenjacket went a bit too far.

I bought red roses, got up early, went to her place and placed one rose on her doorstep, one on her windshield, one on her desk at work and one in her coffee cup.

She was a little creeped out.


9. NikitaVanBuren put in an unsettling amount of effort, for nothing.

I worked in the office at a construction company part time at 17. I'm a flirt anyway, but there was one young guy I actually had a crush on so I always thought he was flirting flirting with me. For his birthday I found a doll sized truck that looked exactly like his and baked him a cake shaped like a garage with the truck inside. Yes it was difficult and time consuming. "Wow this is amazing. My wife is gonna love it too and probably want to know how you did this." :/

Pro tip: Guys in hands-on vocations often don't wear wedding rings for fear they will have to be cut off in an accident.


10. It's like andiswearrrr was actually trying to make a terrible impression.

For the purposes of this post, my name is Mark. I saw a coin on the ground while talking to a girl, and decided to show off how "cool" I was in a humorous way.

"I don't know why everyone thinks I'm so cool at everything I do. Hey look, a penny!"

I picked up the coin and then started celebrating.

"Go Mark, go Mark, it's your birthday! It's your birthday!"

The humor being that I was oblivious to being cool at even the little things, like picking up coins. Fuck I was horrible.

Andiswearrrr is not a ladies' man.
Andiswearrrr is not a ladies' man.

11. Sounds like Manpancake might've been better off without this lady.

Bought her a piano...

It didn't work...

She kept the piano.

12. Wormish's ploy might've worked a few years earlier.

Gave him a worm. I was 16. It did not work.

13. While Handeatingcat dabbled in some low-key stalking.

I knew which way she walked home from school, so one sick day I wrote " I LOVE HEIDI" in giant chalk letters on the sidewalk where I knew she'd pass. I hid in the bushes and when she walked by I yelled "Looook doown!". She promptly decided to speed walk the rest of the way home, I never told her it was me.


14. Blairmatthews was really cool.

I was about 10-12 and spotted my crush playing on his bike outside my house, so I sat in my bedroom window with an assortment of cool things like my gameboy colour or my new furby, pretending to be really interested in these items so he would notice how cool I was...

15. Molly__hatchet did not think through her gesture.

In junior high I had a major crush on the new kid. So naturally I bought a card, cut out all the letters I would need from a magazine, and essentially sent him an anonymous pay-me-ransom-or-I'll-kill-your-kid style note. Needless to say it didn't work.

Molly__hatchet (whose username is appropriate) didn't see that response coming?
Molly__hatchet (whose username is appropriate) didn't see that response coming?

16. It's safe to assume RockyFlintstone's master plan didn't work out.

Back in college - I made a mix tape for the BABY HE WAS HAVING WITH ANOTHER WOMAN.

17. Sure, stopfoulingjeff's story is a long read, but it's worth it for the imagery of jorts if nothing else.

posted this a year ago, but the question is too fitting.

When I was in 6th grade my parents talked me in to going to a week long church camp. I knew of, but didn't know personally any of the kids going, but they sold me that everyone would praise Jesus, ride horses, and have a good time. I decided to go. It was like a 6 hour drive in one of those big white vans. Quickly everyone started whipping out their CD cases and exchanging music and I instantly was like FUCK. I only had 2 CD's: Britney Spears "Baby One More Time" and Everclear. I was a really weird kid. Everyone was trying to talk to me about music and I had honestly never heard of any of the bands they were talking about. I just wanted to jam some Britney to myself. So naturally, I went the elitist route, said I had all of that music and I was listening to some new underground private shit they hadn't heard of.

Once we get to camp all I'm thinking is let's find some friends quick because I can't talk to these kids anymore. I go to the pool and make some friends with a few older kids. There were 3 girls, 2 guys, and me. They were all in 8th grade so obviously they were really cool. Plus, I thought the girls were really hot. I figured this would be the best time, if any, to get my first kiss. Their windshield wipers were turned up to the maximum with all the game 6th grade me was spitting. We decide to leave the pool and walk around the camp till we all had to have a group meet up. The "cabins" were separated by grades so they said they would walk by the 6th grade cabin and pick me up.

First thing I do is put on my freshest outfit. Great time to break out my fresh white T-shirt. Can't forget my jean shorts. This was pre faded denim, so this was the industrial bright blue jean shorts. It's summer in Texas so I might was well top the outfit off with knee high white socks. And, of course, for the bitches... Doc Martens. I looked like a weird redneck lumberjack. So I walk out and they're kind of like wtf, but whatever. It's kiss time. We start walking and one of the older guys farts and all the girls laugh. Boom. Found my in. My friend Travis and I have been making fart jokes for quite some time so i'm up to speed on this area of humor. Bam, the other guy farts and all the girls laugh even harder. Got em. Now I'm thinking all I have to do is drop the biggest fart and literally the girls are going to laugh so hard they're going to each kiss me one by one. I start clinching and squeezing my stomach as hard as I can. I'm walking like a newborn deer. Then I feel it. Got a big one ready. So, instead of just dropping it out and laughing I wanted to make a big show about it. I run in front of the small group, squat down, turn just my head around, and forcefully shit myself. This was all out diarrhea. If you didn't know this before, early 90's denim was the least forgiving fabric in the world. EVERYONE knew I shit. It's running down my leg, being soaked up by my knee high socks. Instantly, I just react and start running. Kicking up shit like mud off a truck. I've never been to this camp before so I'm just running for anything. I find a bathroom toss the socks, boxers, shirt, but I couldn't drop the jorts. I can't just walk across the CHURCH camp naked. Plus at this point i'm thinking maybe they didn't really see it. I was really confident in my speed at the time so I was thinking I could say that's my thing. I drop giant farts and run before the smell catches me. Come to find out, not only were the 5 people I shit in front of outside the bathroom waiting for me, but there were like 25 kids. Instantly, I just ran in my doc's and jorts combo back to the cabin I was staying in with the other kids chasing me and yelling "shit pants"

I run to my bed to find all the music nerds I drove up with going through my cd case. It only has the 2 cds. They are like wtf? Thought you had TONS OF SECRET MUSIC BRO. Wait, did you shit your pants? So yeah that was about 4 hours in to a week long trip. I really thought farting would impress these girls. I lost my favorite pair of jorts and pride that day.

Shitting yourself in front of cute girls is bad. Doing so while wearing jorts is the worst.
Shitting yourself in front of cute girls is bad. Doing so while wearing jorts is the worst.

That story is rough, but stopfoulingjeff ended up with one less pair of jorts, so there's a silver lining here after all.