Writer Kadia Blagrove shared a story on XOJane that sounds like a stress-induced nightmare, except she really had to live through it. She'd been dating a guy for about 6 months, with the understanding that they were exclusive, but something wasn't feeling quite...right. We can all see where this is going. People cheat and they're discovered in all sorts of ways, but what happened to Kadia was pretty next level. She discovered her boyfriend out on a date with another woman and he pretended not to know her.
She describes how this horror show began with a night out with a girlfriend, gossiping about how her guy had been giving her trouble. They happened to be in his neighborhood and decided to go to a local bar:
Upon entering the bar, I half-jokingly said “Imagine if he’s in here with some other girl.” Like magic, the Universe said “BITCH YOU GUESSED IT! YOU WAS MOTHER FUCKING RIGHT!”
I saw him there, sitting at the bar where we usually sat, with another woman, caressing her face and holding her hips.
I made eye contact with the bartender who looked back at me with pitiful eyes and a remorseful shrug. I felt so pathetic. I immediately went back outside and burst into tears. That whole moment felt unreal.
I just remember shouting, “I fucking hate him!” The drunk, the sober, and the in-between all stood and watched me cry my eyes out.
Kadia rallied and went back into the bar, which in itself is amazing. Most of us would run home to throw up and then eat ice cream.
As my "boyfriend” sat there laughing and giggling with his date, I tapped him on the shoulder and coldly said, “Hi.” (I literally had nothing else to say.)
He looked up at me shocked, and then immediately returned his attention to his date. He acted like he didn’t know me.
This man, who just a week ago had sent me a love song and interrogated me to find out whether I gave another guy my number, acted as if I were nothing more than a stranger. Embarrassment had reached its peak.
Moments later her "boyfriend" fled to the restroom and the girl he was with actually started a fun chat with Kadia about loving her hair. Then it all came out:
I blurted out, “Is that your boyfriend?”
She girlishly smiled. “No, this is just a date, but I’ve been seeing him for a little while.”
“Oh, OK. I took my shot. "This is just odd for me because that’s my boyfriend.”
Her mouth fell open and she just kept saying, “Oh my God!”
Kadia left soon after, leaving her ex-man to cower in the toilet. While she felt wrecked, she didn't answer any of the many calls and "hey hi hello" texts that followed from the dude for the next three months. She said he never left an apology or explanation, just demands that she respond to him. While a part of her is curious about what he might have said, she ultimately knows she deserves better:
But even though I was heart-broken, I knew my worth. There was nothing to gain from inviting him back into my life. I took a logical and selfish look at myself and the kind of respect I require from anyone who wants to spend time with me.
So I let it go. I didn't let curiosity get the best of me. I didn't even flip the hell out when I originally confronted him. Maybe that's weakness. Or maybe it's strength.
Hard for anyone to know how they'd respond in that situation until they've lived it. Maybe...arson?
Read the rest of the story on XOJane.