The early stages of relationships are so fun, and often adorably awkward. One Reddit user proved that was true when she posted a story in the TIFU (Today I F***ed Up) sub-Reddit about the bloodshed (yes, it was human blood) that occurred when she asked her date to unlace her corset. (Spoiler: Everyone is okay and this story is the epitome of adorable awkwardness.)
Here's what she wrote on Reddit:
Our story begins with a movie date and a lot of alcohol (as most good awkward romantic encounters do.)
This happened 5 minutes ago.
(Update: I thought I had fucked up because my anxiety was super high when I typed this)
So, as the title says, I am a corset/waist trainer. I had a few broken ribs from a motorcycle accident when I was 16, and needed something to stabilize my ribs/back while I am at work. I've been wearing corsets for 3-4 years now and I usually wear a tank top underneath my corset because it's more comfortable that way.
I get invited over by the guy I've been talking to for a few weeks. He's an absolutely sweet, adorable bundle of awkward anxiety. I bring pizza and beer over, and we start drinking and watching movies. His roommates come home with a bottle of whiskey, and we end up taking shots with them.
What happens next will have you simultaneously saying "Oh dear God, that poor boy," and, "Awwww!"
Naturally, I'm a little too tipsy to drive home, so he offers to let me stay the night there. I find a (clean) pair of scrub bottoms in my car, and take off my Darth Vader Christmas sweater that I was wearing over my corset. He's watching me with a look of awe because he has never seen my corset actually laced on my body.
I look down and then look at him and ask 'do you want to unlace my corset?'
He said, 'yes', so fast that it startled me, which startled him, which caused him to trip over his desk chair and hit his face on his desk. He got up and unlaced my corset before noticing there was blood trickling down his cheek. He ended up getting a (shallow) cut on his cheek and got a black eye.
TLDR: I have interesting wardrobe choices. Ask the guy I'm seeing if he wants to take it off. He scared me, I scared him, and he trips and gets a black eye.
Don't worry, she provided Reddit with two updates, both on her date's black eye and how the rest of their night went.
(Update: he is alright. The swelling is getting worse, but, hey! He's taking it like a champ. Made a makeshift ice pack and he's happily watching another movie. I'm glad he doesn't hate me)
(Update #2: I turned my phone off and finished watching the movie with him. I didn't expect this to blow up. We did not have sex, because we both decided it's too early (this was our third date). He's doing much better, he's still adorable, and right now he is making breakfast while I get ready for work.)
I cannot stress enough how much I love this story and sincerely hope this girl sends updates to the internet on how their relationship is progressing. This experience is too adorably awkward for these two to not stay together forever and ever. I hope they tell this story at their wedding.