Super suave guy gets the ultimate revenge against 'jerk waiter' hitting on his date.

Super suave guy gets the ultimate revenge against 'jerk waiter' hitting on his date.

A guy was on a first date with a woman when the waiter started hitting on her. As if dating wasn't hard enough, now you have to compete with the dude with the bread sticks? Most people would be thinking murder, but our hero explains on reddit how he managed a more impressive revenge.

Redditor TalkingLikeAFarmer sets the scene:

I was on a date with a woman I had met through a work function. We went to a nice Italian place that was near my office and were having a really pleasant evening, though the waiter seemed to have a thing for my date. It's a family-owned place and not at all unusual for the wait staff to pay general compliments to the customers. It can set a really great atmosphere, but this guy was borderline hitting on my date - enough for her to uncomfortably ask me if it was normal.

What a creep. You want to be on the waiter's side but a restaurant is not your dating gallery, weirdo.

Our hero tried to quietly set him straight.

A few minutes after the entrees arrived the waiter swung by to make sure everything was acceptable, but he laid it on thick by implying that I didn't deserve such a lovely woman. We laughed it off, but a minute later I excused myself to use the rest room and tracked down the waiter to request that he tone it down a few notches, as he was embarrassing himself, my date and me. He was a bit overconfident in feigning ignorance, but assured me he would refrain from further compliments.

The service was absolutely fine after that and it became a memorable evening of getting to know someone new in a romantic setting. Until the check came - I stuck my credit card in the bill book, but when the waiter returned he apologized and said the card had been declined. I immediately knew what was going on because I pay my CC off in full every single month - I don't use it for big, long-term purchases.

He insists that he tried it twice, and that perhaps we try another card... or my date could pay the bill.


Oh. No. He. Didn't.

This is where he kills him, right? Nope.

I'm usually pretty levelheaded in tense situations, but I have to admit this nearly ruined the evening for me. I kept my voice down, but demanded the owner visit the table to get involved. The waiter assured me that wasn't necessary and that he'd try the card again, but I insisted and said I would track her down myself if he didn't care to.

The look on his face when he realized that this was happening was sweeter than the dessert we'd shared.


He disappeared for about a minute and returned with the check, claiming that it went through this time and would I still care to involve the owner.

Were it not for 20% gratuity being built into the bill, I would have said no. Instead I told him that he could refund me the 20%, or I could request the owner do it. Sheepishly he said:

"Yes sir, I'll remove the tip immediately."

The woman and I never got very serious, but this was a great inside joke that kept us laughing on the few dates we had after that.


This is the most justified story of not tipping ever told. Please use with caution.