Here's what it's like to go on a first date with a professional wrestler.

Here's what it's like to go on a first date with a professional wrestler.
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I went out with a pro wrestler and yes, he talked about pro wrestling a lot.

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This was not my date, but he sure looks like a lot of fun, don't you think? (Thinkstock)

Quick update: things didn't work out with Mike because he's an artist and he decided to leave NYC to travel the world or something (I think his parents are rich? Ugh, who knows). So anyway, I'm going to continue going on dates, giving anyone a chance who doesn't have horns or wear color contacts.

For your enjoyment and mine, I'm going to refer to my date as The Wrestler. Also, using this name has the added bonus of keeping him anonymous. I met The Wrestler on Twitter, because let's face it, these are modern times we live in, and I'm a goddamned modern woman.

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He messaged me back in December to invite me to see a wrestling show in Brooklyn. It was the first time I'd seen wrestling, and it was the beautiful nerd-fest I'd hoped it would be. When I went backstage to meet him, he told me the inside scoop about the show, the background drama and, of course, who used to date whom. OH, AND: this whole conversation took place while he was wearing a t-shirt and a speedo. That was a first.

Since the show, The Wrestler and I had texted intermittently, and he asked me to go out the next time he was in town. I had him meet me at a bar where I was having drinks with my awesome co-workers, because I like to make first dates as awkward as humanly possible. The Wrestler was totally cool with and fit right in, except for the fact that he towered over everyone at 6'4" and probably, like, 200-something pounds.

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Korean BBQ and Karaoke. All in one convenient building.

I took The Wrestler to Koreatown for dinner, and if you haven't been there, it's the length of one city block, but manages to fit something like 1,000 times the number of businesses as every other city block. It's got all the good stuff: food, karaoke, bubble tea, karaoke, unlocked iPhones, and karaoke.

We went to my favorite Korean BBQ restaurant and ate a plate of meat that our waitress cooked right in front of us. She kept smacking The Wrestler's arm because he tried to eat the meat before it was done, but she was laughing about it. I always thought I could eat a lot, but um, well, my eating skills paled in comparison to The Wrestler. Not shocking, I know. But I thought I'd at least be a close second! Not the case.

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Yes we'd like one plate of raw meat, please.

The Wrestler said "I think our waitress is Japanese, I'm going to find out." (gasp! But we were in Koreatown!) He ended up having a conversation with her in Japanese while I nodded along, clueless in my one-language solitude. He wrestles in Japan, and said that's what they talked about (or they planned a date the next night, who knows). As we walked towards the door, our waitress came running up to us and said "My other table say they know you! They see you wrestle!" Oh wow! He got celebrity sighted! The Wrestler was humble about it, and it made me like him more.

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As we left the restaurant, I was walking in front of The Wrestler up the stairs to the door and he lifted me up the last step. Gah! I guess it was a show of strength? I ended up laughing because I was so surprised, when in fact I still don't know if it was endearing or demeaning. I'm considering it a nice gesture, since he was very sweet about it and I don't want to go off on a feminist tangent right now.

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Art in a park.

After dinner, we walked around Madison Square Park and saw the trippy mirror installation by Teresita Fernández, and ended up talking for a long time, maybe even two whole hours. I probably missed a lot of funny tweets in that time, but it was worth it. His job is pretty cool, he travels the world and pretends to beat people up for the enjoyment of adoring super-fans.

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I planned to take the subway home, but The Wrestler was kind enough to drive me home, where I allowed him to kiss me in the front seat of his rental car outside the Chinese restaurant called Best Chinese Rest that's below my apartment. That part definitely felt like high school, so I said, "this feels like high school," and he agreed. You know what didn't feel like high school? The part where I didn't have a curfew, AMIRITE?! (I just high-fived nobody).

Sounds like a good date, huh? I know! I was pleasantly surprised. Now I just have to wait until the next time he's in New York to see him again, because he lives approximately 1,200 miles away and travels all the time. I'll be here if anyone needs advice on how to set yourself up for a lifetime of loneliness!

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