There are so many ways for the person you're dating to be terrible to you. That truth came out in a Reddit thread that posed the question, "What is the most awful thing a former girl/boyfriend/date has done to you?" With thousands of responses, there were stories from people that covered a lot of the worst stuff. Most of it is of the sadly everyday abuse/cheating/lying variety. But some of these dating nightmares are just effing cray cray! Vicariously enjoy others' weird heartbreak below:
1. The Super Villain
Borrowed ~$1,000 from me to fly her ex-boyfriend in from Spain while I was on a business trip.
She told me she needed the money in order to pay back an advance she had taken out at her job. Admittedly, I was preoccupied with work and I didn’t think much about it until I got back and noticed a marked shift in the way she acted around me.
It didn’t take much investigation for her whole lie to collapse in on itself. My stepmother was the Benefits/HR Manager at her company. When I called her and asked her to look into the details of the advance, she informed me that they didn’t permit payroll advances.
I confronted her and the whole can of worms opened up. She had been corresponding with her Andalusian ex-lover for months and realized she was still in love with him. She had actually planned the whole thing for weeks but–and here’s the real kick in the dick– was afraid to use her own money in case I found out and kicked her out of the apartment.
I mean– that sort of efficiently cruel calculation is some serious supervillain shit.
2. The Over Reaction.
Slashed my tires because I was on the phone to my mom.
3. The Disappearing Act.
So I’m very shy and hadn’t dated for awhile but there was this girl I was really interested in so I finally worked up the nerve to ask her out. However she wasn’t interested in me and neatly bait-and-switched me into somehow going out on a blind date with her friend instead. Still a date after so long without is a date and I decided to make it a good one…. reservations to a really nice restaurant, theater tickets, then watching the fireworks from the roof of my building that had a great view of the National Mall (this was 4th of July weekend in Washington D.C.).
I picked her up and was surprised that she was cute and seemed intelligent and funny. Small talk seemed to be working well right from the start. We went to the restaurant first. It was a place on the top floor of a hotel… great big picture windows overlooking the capital building and staff in formal-wear. Looked over the menu and we both ordered.
Then she excused herself to go wash her hands. She didn’t come back. Haven’t dated since.
4. The Actor.
Faked his own death for a week so he could fuck his ex. When I found out he was alive I blew up on him, and he faked a seizure to defuse the situation. It worked.
5. The Poor Decision Maker?
He got a prostitute pregnant.
6. The Amateur Tattoo Artist
My boyfriend got me fuckin wasted (my first time drinking, I was 13/14 He was 16) and at some point in my drunken half conscious night, he carved his name into my arm with a razor and mine into his. 7 years later I still have the scars but just finally got a tattoo over to cover it up.
7. The Baby Maker
Dated a girl for fourish years in high school and never had sex. We break up, 10 months later she pops out a kid fathered by one of my childhood friends.
8. The One Who Failed the Oral Exam
Broke up with me while giving me oral sex. Literally mid-lick.
9. The Revenge Backfire
I once dated this insanely hot girl as a revenge tactic for my ex. Didn't really enjoy her company, and she seemed like a bit of a shitshow anyways, but I digress.
Halloween 2011, she got fucked up on speed and ended up kicking the shit out of me, broke into my house, and stole $4000 worth of my shit, including my les paul :(
Also please note I'm a 100lb girl and she was a lightweight boxer.
You'd think I'd learn not to jam the clam of crazy.
10. The Mistaken Identity
Texted me "I love you" and just a minute after he sent another message saying that it was to the wrong person. That shit hurt.
11. The Happy Holidays!
Freshman year of college my high school girlfriend broke up with me in a Christmas card.
Not cheating or abuse, but still a mind fuck.
12. The Appropriate Username Checking In.
Appropriate username checking in.