We've all been wrong at some point in our lives, or at least have been forced to say we are.
It's National Kiss and Make Up Day, because it's not enough to make us celebrate fake holidays, they're also forcing us to say "sorry." In celebration, we (the staff and contributors at Someecards) put together this compilation of the worst things we've been forced to apologize for, either by outside forces or our own consciences. Keep in mind, these are the worst things we've apologized for. There's lots of other terrible stuff we'll never back down about.
Read these nightmares below:
A few New Year's Eves back I was celebrating with large amounts of alcohol. At the stroke of midnight, my also-drunken friend rang in the new year by giving me a massive bear hug that lifted me off the ground. He then began spinning me in a circle while shaking me like a rag doll. A spray of vomit shot from my mouth in multiple directions that I was powerless to stop or aim safely. A lot of it got on people coats. I had to pay for dry cleaning and apologize even though it was only half my fault. -Justin Laub
In 1st grade, my school made me write an apology letter to my parents because I had "put on a show for the boys in the bathroom." In the letter, I wrote, "I made a bad choices." -Matt Nedostup
Somebody was sending me $5 a picture through Paypal to send him pictures of my bitten nails… I had to apologize to him when I decided porn wasn't my thing and stopped sending them. -Luke Ollett
Also from Luke:
Peeing in their underwear drawer. [Ed's note: presumably a different person than the fingernail porn.]
I went on three dates with someone and found out that the whole time I'd had mono. Then to let him know, even though we're both Millennials, I called him on the telephone. It's unconscionable to make someone have a conversation by phone. -Ariel Karlin
When moving, I accidentally threw out my wife’s suitcase containing her birth certificate and our marriage license. Although I have no real memory of the event, my best guess is that she told me the bag was important, and then later when she was gone, I looked at the bag and remembered there was something important about it, and must have decided I was supposed to throw it out. I am a sitcom husband, except I live in the real world. So, my absent-minded antics result in a lot of apologies. -Johnny McNulty
I was so hungover the day after a wedding, I had to ask my sister and brother-in-law to pull over on the highway so I could puke. Then I sat next to them on a flight from SF to NYC and got up every 20 minutes to puke in the bathroom. Once we got back to NYC, I got out of the cab and puked outside their apartment. I was so exhausted they let me sleep on their couch. I'm the worst. [Ed's note: not in this post!] -Ashley Bez
My girlfriend and I split up amicably just before going to a new Thai restaurant. The restaurant was in a converted house in upstate New York, so it was packed but also we were basically eating in a living room. Everyone could see and hear you. By the time our food came we had fought and made up again, but were both weeping so intensely that we couldn’t eat. All the patrons were mad, and the people who worked there looked like they thought the food upset us. I said sorry to the whole room over and over but no one who worked there spoke English very well. Later, I ate some cold pad thai alone in my room. Still feel bad for the owner of that place because it was the week they opened. The Yelp reviews must have been fun: "food’s good but the atmosphere is very upsetting." -Dan Wilbur
My parents made me do youth soccer when I was 8 or 9. For one of our first practices, we were all rotating positions so the coach could determine what our strong suits were. During my turn as goalie, the coach's son (who was playing defense), kept trying to give me pointers on how to goalie. I thought it was kind of patronizing so I told him to stop showing off, and he all of a sudden just started sobbing. The rest of the season was really awkward. -Bijan Samareh
Wiping my chicken grease hands on my step-father's shirt with deliberate malicious intent. -Aimée Lutkin
I repeatedly snorted cocaine in the synagogue bathroom during a good friend's wedding and then gave a spontaneous (unasked for) speech that several people described as "pretty much ruining the wedding." I was forgiven, and have since given speeches that ruined several other weddings, but without the use of drugs. -Brook Lundy, everyone's boss.
After reading these, almost any feud seems surmountable. With whom do you need to bury the hatchet?