The seller of this friendship auction claims to be a "professional marketing and selling guru," but by the time the auction closed he had sold off a full year of his friendship for the price of one hour with a non-metropolitan area based prostitute. It's the "and more" at the end of his pitch that ruins it. With a facial expression this menacingly blank, "and more" almost definitely means "I can't wait to do stuff to your corpse." (Via Reddit, eBay)