Relationships

<p>We hear many stories from people who&#39;ve been cheated on. But the ones who did the cheating tend to keep quiet, probably out of guilt or fear of getting shamed/chastised. But, although cheating is wrong, people who cheat often have a reason behind their actions. In many cases, these reasons don&#39;t justify their actions. But sometimes they do. And either way, at least it can help us understand why they did it.</p><p>In a popular Reddit thread, someone <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ozrulf/cheatersadulterers_of_reddit_why_didnt_you_just/" target="_blank">asked</a> this provocative question: &quot;Cheaters/Adulterers of Reddit, why didn&#39;t you just break up with your SO instead of cheating on them?&quot;</p><h2>These 17 people who strayed from a relationship get honest about why they cheated instead of breaking up:</h2><p>1.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/kharmatika/">kharmatika</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I wasn&#39;t ready to settle down, I should have just dated around for longer, but I also really liked one of the people I was dating and he wanted monogamy. I was 19 and wanted both worlds. it was stupid but that&#39;s how it went down.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>2.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/tequilaearworm/">tequilaearworm</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I cheated on my bf in high school because he threatened suicide every time I tried to break up and being young, didn&#39;t realize it was manipulative and he probably wouldn&#39;t. I felt trapped as the person keeping him alive with a relationship and sex I did not want, and also like he did not deserve my monogamy because he was trapping me in it. So I got mine and honestly the dude I cheated on him with, once he heard about the suicide thing, is the one who made me see I wasn&#39;t responsible for his life and I was able to break up. Never cheated since and I don&#39;t have regrets.</p> </blockquote><p>3.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/I_Regret_Something/">I_Regret_Something</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Just facts for you.Married 10 years. Wife refuses therapy and counseling. I&rsquo;ve been in therapy for 11 years. Wife goes out of her way on the regular to remind me if we ever got divorced I would never see my daughter again. I have no family. She comes from money and makes twice as much as I do. We&rsquo;ve had sex once this year. Yes I jerk off but the fact I&rsquo;m 40 and married and have to sneak around to masturbate is depressing. What&rsquo;s more depressing? Feeling like you have no value to the opposite sex. I would absolutely cheat if given the chance.I&rsquo;ve never cheated but I think about it constantly. I feel like I&rsquo;m going to look back on this time in my life and hate myself for giving up.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>4.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/JinseixBoku/">JinseixBoku</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Cuz I&#39;m a selfish piece of shit. My girlfriend was my best friend but we weren&#39;t on the same page sexually. I was horny so I cheated on her, but I was afraid to come clean because I didn&#39;t want to lose her friendship.</p> </blockquote><p>5.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/GinyGalvan88/">GinyGalvan88</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Have to say, I was in a very bad state of mind. I have BPD and I wasn&#39;t being treated at the time, so I was in my worst. I thought I was in love with my bf back then, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him... But the truth is I was only obsessed and I was being so manipulative towards him he was scared of breaking up with me, but he didn&#39;t want to spend time with me, refused having intimacy and was plainly sick of having me around... And I needed so badly the attention I cheated on him with the first guy showing interest in me.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>-we both are doing much better. Broke up after having a baby together, and are overall happy without each other. I am in love with my bf now and I would never think of pulling that kind of BS on him.</p> </blockquote><p>6.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Yes_James/">Yes_James</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Short answer is I was a self centred a**hole. I married way too young and I was in the forces, away for long periods and it was always on a plate, no questions asked and impossible for her to find out. After 5 years I ended the marriage as I hated myself as it felt like a cancer, the lying and living a double life does get to you in the end. Funny thing is I immediately got into another relationship (married her) and never looked at another women. Now I would never think of cheating and hate the idea.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>7.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/drippen9xx/">drippen9xx</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Cuz I suck</p> </blockquote><p>8.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/james-c-m-kim/">james-c-m-kim</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Still loved her, thought I could bury the whole sordid mess under the rug of time, and pretend it never ever existed. That was a huge mistake. Maybe not as huge as the cheating, but it was huge.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I stayed because I genuinely loved her. I seriously thought I could make this work. It didn&#39;t. I learned some life changing lessons here, and add I move on with my life, I&#39;ll be sure not to repeat this stupid mistake ever again. Faithfulness and honesty. That&#39;s going to be the bedrock of all of my future relationships. There&#39;s nothing else for me to add.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>9.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Delicious-Major-5510/">Delicious-Major-5510</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Sneaking around gives them an adrenaline rush/excitement &mdash;kinda like people who shoplift but aren&rsquo;t poor/don&rsquo;t need to</p> </blockquote><p>10.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/relievebelieve/">relievebelieve</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Incidentally, it is his and my fetish so it just works</p> </blockquote><p>11.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/thisismywifiname/">thisismywifiname</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I ask myself this alot. I very much regret what I did, I won&#39;t lie, but the only thing I can really come up with is; I was miserable, and scared, and mentally flailing at what I should do. We were married, and I was scared to break a &quot;christian relationship&quot; (I&#39;m agnostic, SO come from a VERY religious family, and I wanted to try and honor that), but I was miserable, and was trying to make something better for myself. When SO found out (circumstances of that are generally irrelevant), they were gracious at first, and we worked through it. And then at every instance it was thrown back in my face, and I ended up filing for divorce about two years later. Moral of the story: I was miserable, and didn&#39;t know how to handle it.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>12.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/sticky_bunz_22/">sticky_bunz_22</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was drunk and horny. It wasn&#39;t a premeditated thing. It was definitely the worst thing I&#39;ve ever done, but it was a one time thing. It took some time, we broke up for a year, but things are great now. This was 8 years ago, we&#39;re engaged now.</p> </blockquote><p>13.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Gullible_Asparagus56/">Gullible_Asparagus56</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Dead bedroom for 5 years. Didn&#39;t leave because I still loved her.</p> <p>I confessed to her recently. We&#39;re now broken up.</p> </blockquote><p>14.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/lunahaywire/">lunahaywire</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Married at 19. 10 years and 3 kids later, I cheated on husband. He was not nice, refused to listen to my pleas to improve our marriage, or go to counseling. Started chatting with a guy who actually asked how my day was going, said I was pretty, and I sucked up the positive attention and fell for it. Really wanted to stay married and be happy, but it didn&rsquo;t work. We divorced and both remarried and are much happier now.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>15.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/dstroyer123/">dstroyer123</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I&#39;ll answer for my ex. She didn&#39;t want to leave the &quot;financial safety of the marriage&quot; but wanted to explore her sexuality with our neighbors wife.</p> </blockquote><p>16.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/TAKittenDust/">TAKittenDust</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>The person I was with at the time was the one I wanted to be with but they were emotionally unavailable so I found other outlets. That was many moons ago. No one is perfect.</p> </blockquote><p>17.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/h4rlotsghost/">h4rlotsghost</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was really immature. I&rsquo;m not really into to many regrets What&rsquo;s done is done and in the past. But, I really wish I&rsquo;d been mature enough to just break up with the woman I cheated on. She was really cool and didn&rsquo;t deserve the bullshit and pain that I put her through. It&rsquo;s one of the few things I really wish I could go back and redo. 15 years later I still have stress dreams about it from time to time. I don&rsquo;t know why I couldn&rsquo;t have just said, &ldquo;You&rsquo;re great but this isn&rsquo;t going to work out.&rdquo;</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

17 cheaters reveal why they cheated on a partner instead of just breaking up.

We hear many stories from people who&#39;ve been cheated on. But the ones who did the cheating tend to keep quiet, probably out of guilt or fear of getting shamed/chastised. But, although cheating is wrong, people who cheat often have a reason behind their actions. In many cases, these reasons don&#39;t justify their actions. But sometimes they do. And either way, at least it can help us understand why they did it.In a popular Reddit thread, someone asked this provocative question: &quot;Cheaters/Adulterers of Reddit, why didn&#39;t you just break up with your SO instead of cheating on them?&quot;These 17 people who strayed from a relationship get honest about why they cheated instead of breaking up:1.) From kharmatika: I wasn&#39;t ready to settle down, I should have just dated around for longer, but I also really liked one of the people I was dating and he wanted monogamy. I was 19 and wanted both worlds. it was stupid but that&#39;s how it went down. 2.) From tequilaearworm: I cheated on my bf in high school because he threatened suicide every time I tried to break up and being young, didn&#39;t realize it was manipulative and he probably wouldn&#39;t. I felt trapped as the person keeping him alive with a relationship and sex I did not want, and also like he did not deserve my monogamy because he was trapping me in it. So I got mine and honestly the dude I cheated on him with, once he heard about the suicide thing, is the one who made me see I wasn&#39;t responsible for his life and I was able to break up. Never cheated since and I don&#39;t have regrets. 3.) From I_Regret_Something: Just facts for you.Married 10 years. Wife refuses therapy and counseling. I&rsquo;ve been in therapy for 11 years. Wife goes out of her way on the regular to remind me if we ever got divorced I would never see my daughter again. I have no family. She comes from money and makes twice as much as I do. We&rsquo;ve had sex once this year. Yes I jerk off but the fact I&rsquo;m 40 and married and have to sneak around to masturbate is depressing. What&rsquo;s more depressing? Feeling like you have no value to the opposite sex. I would absolutely cheat if given the chance.I&rsquo;ve never cheated but I think about it constantly. I feel like I&rsquo;m going to look back on this time in my life and hate myself for giving up. 4.) From JinseixBoku: Cuz I&#39;m a selfish piece of shit. My girlfriend was my best friend but we weren&#39;t on the same page sexually. I was horny so I cheated on her, but I was afraid to come clean because I didn&#39;t want to lose her friendship. 5.) From GinyGalvan88: Have to say, I was in a very bad state of mind. I have BPD and I wasn&#39;t being treated at the time, so I was in my worst. I thought I was in love with my bf back then, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him... But the truth is I was only obsessed and I was being so manipulative towards him he was scared of breaking up with me, but he didn&#39;t want to spend time with me, refused having intimacy and was plainly sick of having me around... And I needed so badly the attention I cheated on him with the first guy showing interest in me.  -we both are doing much better. Broke up after having a baby together, and are overall happy without each other. I am in love with my bf now and I would never think of pulling that kind of BS on him. 6.) From Yes_James: Short answer is I was a self centred a**hole. I married way too young and I was in the forces, away for long periods and it was always on a plate, no questions asked and impossible for her to find out. After 5 years I ended the marriage as I hated myself as it felt like a cancer, the lying and living a double life does get to you in the end. Funny thing is I immediately got into another relationship (married her) and never looked at another women. Now I would never think of cheating and hate the idea. 7.) From drippen9xx: Cuz I suck 8.) From james-c-m-kim: Still loved her, thought I could bury the whole sordid mess under the rug of time, and pretend it never ever existed. That was a huge mistake. Maybe not as huge as the cheating, but it was huge.  I stayed because I genuinely loved her. I seriously thought I could make this work. It didn&#39;t. I learned some life changing lessons here, and add I move on with my life, I&#39;ll be sure not to repeat this stupid mistake ever again. Faithfulness and honesty. That&#39;s going to be the bedrock of all of my future relationships. There&#39;s nothing else for me to add. 9.) From Delicious-Major-5510: Sneaking around gives them an adrenaline rush/excitement &mdash;kinda like people who shoplift but aren&rsquo;t poor/don&rsquo;t need to 10.) From relievebelieve: Incidentally, it is his and my fetish so it just works 11.) From thisismywifiname: I ask myself this alot. I very much regret what I did, I won&#39;t lie, but the only thing I can really come up with is; I was miserable, and scared, and mentally flailing at what I should do. We were married, and I was scared to break a &quot;christian relationship&quot; (I&#39;m agnostic, SO come from a VERY religious family, and I wanted to try and honor that), but I was miserable, and was trying to make something better for myself. When SO found out (circumstances of that are generally irrelevant), they were gracious at first, and we worked through it. And then at every instance it was thrown back in my face, and I ended up filing for divorce about two years later. Moral of the story: I was miserable, and didn&#39;t know how to handle it. 12.) From sticky_bunz_22: I was drunk and horny. It wasn&#39;t a premeditated thing. It was definitely the worst thing I&#39;ve ever done, but it was a one time thing. It took some time, we broke up for a year, but things are great now. This was 8 years ago, we&#39;re engaged now. 13.) From Gullible_Asparagus56: Dead bedroom for 5 years. Didn&#39;t leave because I still loved her. I confessed to her recently. We&#39;re now broken up. 14.) From lunahaywire: Married at 19. 10 years and 3 kids later, I cheated on husband. He was not nice, refused to listen to my pleas to improve our marriage, or go to counseling. Started chatting with a guy who actually asked how my day was going, said I was pretty, and I sucked up the positive attention and fell for it. Really wanted to stay married and be happy, but it didn&rsquo;t work. We divorced and both remarried and are much happier now. 15.) From dstroyer123: I&#39;ll answer for my ex. She didn&#39;t want to leave the &quot;financial safety of the marriage&quot; but wanted to explore her sexuality with our neighbors wife. 16.) From TAKittenDust: The person I was with at the time was the one I wanted to be with but they were emotionally unavailable so I found other outlets. That was many moons ago. No one is perfect. 17.) From h4rlotsghost: I was really immature. I&rsquo;m not really into to many regrets What&rsquo;s done is done and in the past. But, I really wish I&rsquo;d been mature enough to just break up with the woman I cheated on. She was really cool and didn&rsquo;t deserve the bullshit and pain that I put her through. It&rsquo;s one of the few things I really wish I could go back and redo. 15 years later I still have stress dreams about it from time to time. I don&rsquo;t know why I couldn&rsquo;t have just said, &ldquo;You&rsquo;re great but this isn&rsquo;t going to work out.&rdquo; 

We hear many stories from people who&#39;ve been cheated on. But the ones who did the cheating tend to keep quiet, probably out of guilt or fear of getting shamed/chastised. But, although cheating is wrong, people who cheat often have a...