Relationships

<p>Relationships can bring out the best in people, but they can also bring out the absolute worst. Especially when those relationships are toxic, unstable, or one or both partners is being manipulative or dishonest. It takes two to tango, and very often if one partner is behaving in a &quot;crazy&quot; manner, there&#39;s something going on behind-the-scenes to trigger that behavior, or at least enable it. In the words of a legendary Reductress <a href="https://reductress.com/post/im-sorry-i-was-being-so-crazy-while-you-were-treating-me-like-shit/" target="_blank">headline</a>: &quot;I&rsquo;m Sorry I Was Being So Crazy While You Were Treating Me Like Shit.&quot;</p><h2>In response to a popular <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/44nrbe/crazy_girlfriends_of_reddit_whats_your_side_of/" target="_blank">AskReddit thread</a>, these 17 women who were once the &quot;crazy&quot; girlfriend or ex share their side of the story:</h2><p>1.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/gangsterpanda/">gangsterpanda</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I&#39;ve definitely been &quot;crazy&quot;. Snooped through phones, emails, etc. because I knew in my bones he was cheating (confirmed). It made me realize I never want to be with someone who I feel like I &quot;need &quot; to snoop on. Walked away after that.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>2.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/like_my_coffee_black/">like_my_coffee_black</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was meeting his friends for the first time. We all went out and then came back to his house for drinks. I&#39;m talking to his friends getting to know them and be social. He&#39;s upstairs and talking to another friend. Girl walks in and goes up stairs I think nothing of it until his friend comes down and I&#39;m being directed elsewhere.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I realize they&#39;re trying to distract me and of course since I&#39;d been drinking everything was a lot bigger of a deal. I throw a fit and go and knock at the LOCKED door and might&#39;ve start screaming because what else was I supposed to do when he guy your seeing is in a locked room with a pretty girl? I&#39;m humiliated, can&#39;t be talked down and am alone cause they&#39;re all his friends. Screaming, crying and the like.</p> <p>So that&#39;s how I became the crazy one.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>3.) From [deleted]:</p><blockquote> <p>I had a terrible birthday that year. My moms had a positive biopsy, the cancer had spread, and at that it looked super high risk. There was drama at work, where I had to perform layoffs on some long term employees. I texted him about it. He texted me back to make sure I was going to be home that night, and that he was then at my apartment. I thought maybe he was going to surprise me with dinner or something.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I come home and he had been watching my tv (his cable was off) and left fast food wrappers all over my couch. I was miserable and planned to take a bath and get drunk. Next thing you know, his son is at the door. My ex had dropped him off, expecting me to babysit overnight while he went to Hooters with friends. He refused to answer his phone. When he did, he said he didn&#39;t see the big deal, as I said I would be home.</p> <p>His version? I broke up with him because he didn&#39;t get me a birthday present, and I was too materialistic.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>4.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/angelinabobina/">angelinabobina</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>The f**ker had about 1000.00 worth of my Blu Rays in his place, and I&#39;ll be damned if I wasn&#39;t going to blow up his phone numerous times a day until he f**king answered and gave them back to me.</p> </blockquote><p>5.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/flatspoon/">flatspoon</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>He never called me crazy, but if you ignore me for days after constant communication, I&#39;m going to hide in a shadow on a street and wait for you to get home to see you&#39;re with your fiance&eacute; you conveniently forgot to tell me about.</p> </blockquote><p>6.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/harshmellow456/">harshmellow456</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was called the crazy ex-girlfriend. We dated for five years so we had many friends in common. I found out he was cheating on me through sexts on his mac he left open while he was in the shower. I freaked out and I threw his stuff out of MY apartment (he was living there &#39;temporarily&#39; until he could find a job). I wanted to be alone to figure my life out so I turned off my phone so he couldn&#39;t contact me and took off work for a couple days.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>After mentally recuperating, I turn on my phone to some mutual friends calling me a bitch and I&#39;m blocking you! etc. I find out that he had told them I threw him out of OUR apartment because he was talking to his sister and I thought he was cheating. He said I made him homeless. They believed him because I never responded to the accusations because my phone was off! So now they think I&#39;m super jealous and I was crazy because I made him &#39;homeless&#39; (his parents live 45 min away, he started living with them).</p> </blockquote><p>7.) From [deleted]:</p><blockquote> <p>Crazy ex girlfriend here. I had an undiagnosed mental disorder and didn&#39;t understand how to handle emotions appropriately.</p> </blockquote><p>8.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/pickingonsharks/">pickingonsharks</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was young and naive. I was heads over heels in love with a guy. And in my mind letting it go wasn&#39;t an option. In my dumb young brain I thought somehow that if I talked and bugged him enough that I would somehow figure out the way to fix it. This included a drunken night of me showing up at his door and crying for two hours asking him why.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>To be fair he did lead me on for a while telling me we would be together after he got though his whole I wanna be alone period. OBVIOUSLY that didn&#39;t happen. It definitely made me grow up a lot. I realize now especially that when a man decides he&#39;s done with the relationship it&#39;s definitely done.</p> </blockquote><p>9.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/dirtgirlbyday/">dirtgirlbyday</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Crazy ex wife. He continually lied to me after I caught him cheating after 6 years of marriage. I had proof and he kept promising me we&#39;d work on the marriage and he&#39;d quit talking to her. I....just lost my shit. Made his life hell for the next year after that. So glad I never had children with him. At whatever point I finally let it go, I could just walk away with 0 communication.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>10.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/overlordkim/">overlordkim</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was crazy for the first few months of my current relationship. I hated anytime he was away and didn&#39;t have to be. I had never had a SO that I wanted to be around 24/7. I&#39;ve never been a dependent or clingy person. But he was emotionally distant, and I ended up being so attached and he couldn&#39;t understand. Since then, he has become more open and I have become more relaxed.</p> </blockquote><p>11.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/SmokeWine/">SmokeWine</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Well I guess the biggest reason is because he never told me the things I did that bothered him. Like it exploded at some point and things came to light that he never talked to me about once.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Like for example, whenever he told me he was going out I would ask if I could tag a long. When everything blew up this was one of his issues and I told him in disbelief &quot;Why didn&#39;t you just tell me you wanted to be alone? Why leave it at &quot;I&#39;m going to XXX.&quot;?&quot;</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I may have never understood if he was just tired of me or tired of us or if all his reasons were justified. I honestly thought until that point we were okay, so I guess that made me &quot;crazy&quot;.</p> </blockquote><p>12.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Frictus/">Frictus</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I think I was this crazy girlfriend. It was my first serious relationship and I always wanted to be with him. Definitely some crying and yelling phone calls to him. My boyfriend would often forget his phone or let it die, which didn&#39;t help when I wanted to get a hold of him. Either way we worked through it and have been together 4 years now.</p> </blockquote><p>13.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Scamp_/">Scamp_</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I will happily call my boyfriend 30 times in a row when he&#39;s done something wrong and tries to hide from the argument.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>14.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/startittays/">startittays</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>We had kids, he didn&#39;t help and had a major addiction to screens. He also lied to me about everything. I grew up with a sh*tty home life and had never had counseling. I didn&#39;t know how to handle all the crap I was dealing with and definitely acted incredibly crazy for a few years. The crazy even spilled over into my friendships. One day I woke up, decided to change, left with the kids, and got counseling. Best thing I could have ever done for myself and my girls.</p> </blockquote><p>15.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/mullivunulli/">mullivunulli</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>Years ago, I met a guy. It was an instant attraction (for me) and for a time, him too. Things were pretty intense and then for some inexplicable reason he faded on me. This was all over the course of three years.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>It literally drove me crazy when he faded on me. I couldn&#39;t understand why. I was so invested emotionally, just being near him made my body react. Everything just felt right when I was around him. So when it turned out he wasn&#39;t feeling the same, I couldn&#39;t understand it.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I was hurt, so, so hurt, and angry and not knowing why sent me into a really weird headspace. I became obsessed. I never blew up his phone or anything like that. Instead, I&#39;d try to time things and be places I knew he&#39;d be.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>When I heard from a mutual friend about an ex gf of his, I got really jealous and paranoid. Was he seeing her again? WHy? Why her not me? What was wrong with me? So I became obsessed with her too and this is where things got weird.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I began doing drive bys on both their houses. If I saw his car at her house I&#39;d drive around and around until he&#39;d leave. I&#39;d check to see when he was last logged on to facebook, I&#39;d try to work out if they were having sex by the amount of times he logged on.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Before long though, instead of driving by, I began wearing a disguise and walking by her house. I never went to his, just hers when he was there. The pain I&#39;d feel in my chest when I saw his car there was unbearable. I HAD to know what they were doing. Why her not me?</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I escalated to crawling along in bushes outside her house in my ridiculous disguise to try and hear what they were talking about. I heard them having sex a few times. It was sick and creepy and I really hate that I know any of that.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>My behaviour got even worse and I did a few other things I won&#39;t write here. Eventually, I began lurking around outside his house. Long story short, he came right out and confronted me one night, while in &quot;disguise&quot;. He said my name, but instead of seeming angry or weirded out, he just laughed.</p> <p>I stopped all my silly antics after that, but f**k, why did I do it? I don&#39;t know myself. The worst part was that during all these lonely sad nights I spent doing this, I knew it was crazy and weird. But I still did it.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>During the time I was in treatment for suicide attempts and BPD but I still carried on like a weirdo. I never told my therapists about him or her or what I was doing. I wish I had the excuse that I was super crazy and was hearing voices or blacking out, but I made a choice. I hated doing it so much, but I still did and I&#39;m a seemingly normal, well educated person.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>It&#39;s been a few years now, and thinking about it now... it&#39;s like it was someone else. Why did I do that? Will I do it again? Why did I get weird about him and no one else? I don&#39;t know...</p> </blockquote><p>16.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/themolotov/">themolotov</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>I was the &quot;crazy girlfriend.&quot; Granted I was young (18-19) and it was my first serious relationship. I didn&#39;t trust my ex one bit. Didn&#39;t like his friends, was always suspicious of what he was doing. I even made him give me all his passwords. His phone was connected to Google Voice so I could also read his texts.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Turns out, I was right to be suspicious. He was hiding a serious drug addiction. I&#39;m in a much better place now. I&#39;m in a happy, healthy, and loving relationship with the most amazing guy who I could ever imagine. Craziness has subsided and I&#39;d like to think I&#39;m more mature now.</p> </blockquote><p>17.) From <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/SlowofWit/">SlowofWit</a>:</p><blockquote> <p>In defense of my &quot;crazy&quot; ex-girlfriend, she was damaged by her parents&#39; neglect and abuse. Girlfriend didn&#39;t stand a chance as an adult. She had her sweet side, but she had no self-control when under stress.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>People don&#39;t realize, when judging and ridiculing people who have bad behavior, that somewhere in that person&#39;s past there may very well have been physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. It can harm for a lifetime. Those people need patience, kindness, and understanding, not labels.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

17 'crazy' ex-girlfriends share their side of the story.

Relationships can bring out the best in people, but they can also bring out the absolute worst. Especially when those relationships are toxic, unstable, or one or both partners is being manipulative or dishonest. It takes two to tango, and very often if one partner is behaving in a &quot;crazy&quot; manner, there&#39;s something going on behind-the-scenes to trigger that behavior, or at least enable it. In the words of a legendary Reductress headline: &quot;I&rsquo;m Sorry I Was Being So Crazy While You Were Treating Me Like Shit.&quot;In response to a popular AskReddit thread, these 17 women who were once the &quot;crazy&quot; girlfriend or ex share their side of the story:1.) From gangsterpanda: I&#39;ve definitely been &quot;crazy&quot;. Snooped through phones, emails, etc. because I knew in my bones he was cheating (confirmed). It made me realize I never want to be with someone who I feel like I &quot;need &quot; to snoop on. Walked away after that. 2.) From like_my_coffee_black: I was meeting his friends for the first time. We all went out and then came back to his house for drinks. I&#39;m talking to his friends getting to know them and be social. He&#39;s upstairs and talking to another friend. Girl walks in and goes up stairs I think nothing of it until his friend comes down and I&#39;m being directed elsewhere.  I realize they&#39;re trying to distract me and of course since I&#39;d been drinking everything was a lot bigger of a deal. I throw a fit and go and knock at the LOCKED door and might&#39;ve start screaming because what else was I supposed to do when he guy your seeing is in a locked room with a pretty girl? I&#39;m humiliated, can&#39;t be talked down and am alone cause they&#39;re all his friends. Screaming, crying and the like. So that&#39;s how I became the crazy one. 3.) From [deleted]: I had a terrible birthday that year. My moms had a positive biopsy, the cancer had spread, and at that it looked super high risk. There was drama at work, where I had to perform layoffs on some long term employees. I texted him about it. He texted me back to make sure I was going to be home that night, and that he was then at my apartment. I thought maybe he was going to surprise me with dinner or something.  I come home and he had been watching my tv (his cable was off) and left fast food wrappers all over my couch. I was miserable and planned to take a bath and get drunk. Next thing you know, his son is at the door. My ex had dropped him off, expecting me to babysit overnight while he went to Hooters with friends. He refused to answer his phone. When he did, he said he didn&#39;t see the big deal, as I said I would be home. His version? I broke up with him because he didn&#39;t get me a birthday present, and I was too materialistic. 4.) From angelinabobina: The f**ker had about 1000.00 worth of my Blu Rays in his place, and I&#39;ll be damned if I wasn&#39;t going to blow up his phone numerous times a day until he f**king answered and gave them back to me. 5.) From flatspoon: He never called me crazy, but if you ignore me for days after constant communication, I&#39;m going to hide in a shadow on a street and wait for you to get home to see you&#39;re with your fiance&eacute; you conveniently forgot to tell me about. 6.) From harshmellow456: I was called the crazy ex-girlfriend. We dated for five years so we had many friends in common. I found out he was cheating on me through sexts on his mac he left open while he was in the shower. I freaked out and I threw his stuff out of MY apartment (he was living there &#39;temporarily&#39; until he could find a job). I wanted to be alone to figure my life out so I turned off my phone so he couldn&#39;t contact me and took off work for a couple days.  After mentally recuperating, I turn on my phone to some mutual friends calling me a bitch and I&#39;m blocking you! etc. I find out that he had told them I threw him out of OUR apartment because he was talking to his sister and I thought he was cheating. He said I made him homeless. They believed him because I never responded to the accusations because my phone was off! So now they think I&#39;m super jealous and I was crazy because I made him &#39;homeless&#39; (his parents live 45 min away, he started living with them). 7.) From [deleted]: Crazy ex girlfriend here. I had an undiagnosed mental disorder and didn&#39;t understand how to handle emotions appropriately. 8.) From pickingonsharks: I was young and naive. I was heads over heels in love with a guy. And in my mind letting it go wasn&#39;t an option. In my dumb young brain I thought somehow that if I talked and bugged him enough that I would somehow figure out the way to fix it. This included a drunken night of me showing up at his door and crying for two hours asking him why.  To be fair he did lead me on for a while telling me we would be together after he got though his whole I wanna be alone period. OBVIOUSLY that didn&#39;t happen. It definitely made me grow up a lot. I realize now especially that when a man decides he&#39;s done with the relationship it&#39;s definitely done. 9.) From dirtgirlbyday: Crazy ex wife. He continually lied to me after I caught him cheating after 6 years of marriage. I had proof and he kept promising me we&#39;d work on the marriage and he&#39;d quit talking to her. I....just lost my shit. Made his life hell for the next year after that. So glad I never had children with him. At whatever point I finally let it go, I could just walk away with 0 communication. 10.) From overlordkim: I was crazy for the first few months of my current relationship. I hated anytime he was away and didn&#39;t have to be. I had never had a SO that I wanted to be around 24/7. I&#39;ve never been a dependent or clingy person. But he was emotionally distant, and I ended up being so attached and he couldn&#39;t understand. Since then, he has become more open and I have become more relaxed. 11.) From SmokeWine: Well I guess the biggest reason is because he never told me the things I did that bothered him. Like it exploded at some point and things came to light that he never talked to me about once.  Like for example, whenever he told me he was going out I would ask if I could tag a long. When everything blew up this was one of his issues and I told him in disbelief &quot;Why didn&#39;t you just tell me you wanted to be alone? Why leave it at &quot;I&#39;m going to XXX.&quot;?&quot;  I may have never understood if he was just tired of me or tired of us or if all his reasons were justified. I honestly thought until that point we were okay, so I guess that made me &quot;crazy&quot;. 12.) From Frictus: I think I was this crazy girlfriend. It was my first serious relationship and I always wanted to be with him. Definitely some crying and yelling phone calls to him. My boyfriend would often forget his phone or let it die, which didn&#39;t help when I wanted to get a hold of him. Either way we worked through it and have been together 4 years now. 13.) From Scamp_: I will happily call my boyfriend 30 times in a row when he&#39;s done something wrong and tries to hide from the argument. 14.) From startittays: We had kids, he didn&#39;t help and had a major addiction to screens. He also lied to me about everything. I grew up with a sh*tty home life and had never had counseling. I didn&#39;t know how to handle all the crap I was dealing with and definitely acted incredibly crazy for a few years. The crazy even spilled over into my friendships. One day I woke up, decided to change, left with the kids, and got counseling. Best thing I could have ever done for myself and my girls. 15.) From mullivunulli: Years ago, I met a guy. It was an instant attraction (for me) and for a time, him too. Things were pretty intense and then for some inexplicable reason he faded on me. This was all over the course of three years.  It literally drove me crazy when he faded on me. I couldn&#39;t understand why. I was so invested emotionally, just being near him made my body react. Everything just felt right when I was around him. So when it turned out he wasn&#39;t feeling the same, I couldn&#39;t understand it.  I was hurt, so, so hurt, and angry and not knowing why sent me into a really weird headspace. I became obsessed. I never blew up his phone or anything like that. Instead, I&#39;d try to time things and be places I knew he&#39;d be.  When I heard from a mutual friend about an ex gf of his, I got really jealous and paranoid. Was he seeing her again? WHy? Why her not me? What was wrong with me? So I became obsessed with her too and this is where things got weird.  I began doing drive bys on both their houses. If I saw his car at her house I&#39;d drive around and around until he&#39;d leave. I&#39;d check to see when he was last logged on to facebook, I&#39;d try to work out if they were having sex by the amount of times he logged on.  Before long though, instead of driving by, I began wearing a disguise and walking by her house. I never went to his, just hers when he was there. The pain I&#39;d feel in my chest when I saw his car there was unbearable. I HAD to know what they were doing. Why her not me?  I escalated to crawling along in bushes outside her house in my ridiculous disguise to try and hear what they were talking about. I heard them having sex a few times. It was sick and creepy and I really hate that I know any of that.  My behaviour got even worse and I did a few other things I won&#39;t write here. Eventually, I began lurking around outside his house. Long story short, he came right out and confronted me one night, while in &quot;disguise&quot;. He said my name, but instead of seeming angry or weirded out, he just laughed. I stopped all my silly antics after that, but f**k, why did I do it? I don&#39;t know myself. The worst part was that during all these lonely sad nights I spent doing this, I knew it was crazy and weird. But I still did it.  During the time I was in treatment for suicide attempts and BPD but I still carried on like a weirdo. I never told my therapists about him or her or what I was doing. I wish I had the excuse that I was super crazy and was hearing voices or blacking out, but I made a choice. I hated doing it so much, but I still did and I&#39;m a seemingly normal, well educated person.  It&#39;s been a few years now, and thinking about it now... it&#39;s like it was someone else. Why did I do that? Will I do it again? Why did I get weird about him and no one else? I don&#39;t know... 16.) From themolotov: I was the &quot;crazy girlfriend.&quot; Granted I was young (18-19) and it was my first serious relationship. I didn&#39;t trust my ex one bit. Didn&#39;t like his friends, was always suspicious of what he was doing. I even made him give me all his passwords. His phone was connected to Google Voice so I could also read his texts.  Turns out, I was right to be suspicious. He was hiding a serious drug addiction. I&#39;m in a much better place now. I&#39;m in a happy, healthy, and loving relationship with the most amazing guy who I could ever imagine. Craziness has subsided and I&#39;d like to think I&#39;m more mature now. 17.) From SlowofWit: In defense of my &quot;crazy&quot; ex-girlfriend, she was damaged by her parents&#39; neglect and abuse. Girlfriend didn&#39;t stand a chance as an adult. She had her sweet side, but she had no self-control when under stress.  People don&#39;t realize, when judging and ridiculing people who have bad behavior, that somewhere in that person&#39;s past there may very well have been physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. It can harm for a lifetime. Those people need patience, kindness, and understanding, not labels. 

Relationships can bring out the best in people, but they can also bring out the absolute worst. Especially when those relationships are toxic, unstable, or one or both partners is being manipulative or dishonest. It takes two to tango, and...