25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone

25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone

Personally, anything shy of "Hey honey, lets bone" goes right over my head, so I find comfort reading these stories, knowing I'm not the only one.

1. snippybitch:

You can't be subtle, either you mount him or he has no clue.

2. Estebonus:

My wife like to seductively Block out 30 minutes on her dayplanner a week in advance. It's hot.

3. jallesandro:

I stand next to him while he is on the computer game and shout SEX!

4. -DarkRecess- :

It started off as a joke about me being as romantic as a brick to the head (we were talking about how being British, we don't have a romantic stereotype) but now I say it every time just to hear him giggle: "Get on your back, you're getting it!" Works every time.

5. figgypie:

We have a tone of voice we use when we're propositioning. We always ask "so... how you doing?" or "hey". Followed by wiggling eyebrows. Then my husband usually jumps me.

6. 5meterhammer:

My ex wife used to hug me and lightly dry hump me and go "eh, eh, eh" in unison with the thrusts.

7. lynnaimee:

Okay, if you want SUBTLE, normally I'll bite my lip and stare at his mouth and give him the fuck me eyes. Or make sure he catches me staring at his crotch. Or touching of any kind is usually golden.

8. aestherisms:

Snapchat him extremely zoomed in pictures of Guy Fieri and add the caption 'take me to flavortown'.

9. Schmabadoop:

My girlfriend says she just likes to cuddle in bed in the mornings. Lies. Damned lies. When she's horny in the morning she'll start grinding her hips gently into me while we spoon. I love it because sex coming is, and I hate it because I like to lazily lounge in bed for a good hour on a weekend morning before doing anything and that ruins my vibe. In the end, sex happens and it is damn good fantastic sex.

10. oohrosie:

I'm blessed with a beautifully simplistic relationship, and with an ass man. I parade around in my panties for about an hour and then I'm told we're going to bed. Easy peasy! Not exactly subtle, but our other method is quite literally, "Hey, you wanna fuck today?" So... yeah.

11. yourtypeofmetal:

i've been doing some pavlovian exercises where whenever i'm kissing him it starts to get hot and heavy, i'll start to lightly scratch/caress the back of his neck. it's gotten to the point where just doing that guarantees sex. it's kind of awful but it's also amazing and i'm a little proud.

12. getinthegoddamncar:

My boyfriend sucks with subtlety. I always lean in, kiss him, get more touchy, etc. and he just goes "Huh? What's up, what are you doing?" Like, for real, dude? I literally always just end up grabbing his dick through his pants and giving him a pretty intense stare to convey "Give it."

13. halfadash6:

I usually just take off my clothes or start rubbing myself on him. Doing squats directly in front of him is also effective.

14. fruitypants:

I don't do subtle clues, and I don't think that many women do. If we're laying in bed I initiate by playing with his balls, if we're on the couch I get on top of him and make out with him while I dry hump the shit out of his dick area and lower torso. HOWEVER, I was once in a situation where I had to be subtle- my (now ex) boyfriend was super depressed for over a year and he never wanted to fuck, so if I wanted to have sex I had to ease him into it. So, during that time, I would offer him massages when I wanted to bone because massages lead to sex like 80% of the time (and that's a statistic from an actual study on couples giving each other massages, not just anecdotal evidence from my personal experience).

15. dialmformurderess:

I text him "u want sum fuk" from the other room. Works like a charm.


Today I walked into his room, pretended to be a robot, and in my best robot voice said "Proceed with the sex." Made him giggle, and I got pounded ;)

17. liz_lemon_lover:

I always say "Do you want to have a shower?". It means lets get clean and then dirty.

18. pamzee70:

Wear a short skirt with no panties and bend over in front of him.

19. Jilleybean:

My husband prefers subtle! It kinda gives him the opportunity to relax and get into it. Usually we cuddle up spooning and if I'm horny I grab his hand and put it on my breast. Then he knows I'm into it and if he returns the stimulation I know he's into it. It's nice :)

20. Burgerbooty:

Either I just flat out ask if he wants to engage in gland to gland combat, or I will very subtly present him with my butthole. It usually works.

21. Nightthunder:

Past successes include: Telling him I'm horny, Picking up his hand and putting his fingers in my mouth. kissing him hard against a wall or something, grinding on him in bed, and turning on sexy music.

22. CLWsucks:

If the tv is on, I'll go upstairs to our room and get naked, then I use my phone to play "Careless whisper" downstairs through YouTube. I always here a laugh and then him running up the stairs :)

23. ---Help---:


24. contrary_wise:

Asked him to scrub my back in the shower. He didn't get it.

25. ikantunderstandyou:

He really likes it when I use proper grammar.