20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.

20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
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Because people believe they can remain anonymous if they try to on the Internet, Redditors felt comfortable sharing the weirdest, most random things people have said to them during sex.

20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
Yes, this will be interesting.

If you've ever suddenly gotten a weird look from someone mid-session after making a comment, you might want to check the thread and make sure you're not being publicly shamed. Otherwise, take (SFW) pleasure in these people's less than romantic moments.

1. PM_ME_UR_KIDNEYS's partner had an eye for decor.

"Where'd you get that desk? It's lovely."

2. videlli's guy was not thirsty.

"Where can I put my water"

I realized after he asked it the second time that he meant cum and had to contain my laughter.

3. darkfrost47 must've had a messy time.

"Fuck me like BP fucked the Gulf."

4. IntergalacticMadness is understating their ex's personality.

My ex was going to ride me, and climbed on top. Then she said "Now you're the jews, and I'm Hitler" I laughed for 15 minutes straight, and couldn't do a thing. She was weird...

20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
Let's all agree to never say that, OK?
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5. trexpizzaparty couldn't have felt great after this.

"I used to have sex with (his ex) to this CD all the time too"

6. For some reason, multiple people claimed to have said the same thing ffottron was told.

Go deep like you're Aaron fucking Rodgers.

7. Was this supposed to be a compliment for Pun-Chi?

"You're doing a good job!" In a very surprised tone.

8. marcopolo3579 was right in fearing the cat's judgement.

"We need to let the cat watch us." She wanted the cat to watch, so I went with it. Unfortunately, I kept my eyes closed the entire time, fearing the moment I made eye contact with the cat...fearing its silent judgement, and scorn would lead to performance anxiety. The cat's name was Fluffles.

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20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
Why exactly did they "need" to let the cat see?

9. No word on whether Average_Autist agreed.

"The workers revolution is inevitable."

10. TIAT323 and his partner were on the same wavelength.

'Did we tip the waiter at the restaurant earlier?'. - Said mid stroke.

Oddly, I was thinking exactly the same thing. Which is weird because normally all I can think about during sex is the sex.

11. slice_of_pi did not provide further context.

"Holy shit, there's a potato on the floor over there. "

To be fair, there was indeed a potato on the floor.

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12. whyamibackonreddit probably wishes he'd known this earlier.

"This is why I prefer women, cock is just painful"

13. Was this supposed to be an innuendo MilleniumPelican was faced with?

"Are you an organ donor?"

We're still married.

14. Noooope, nope. Shut it down, weird_in_chicago.

I use to date MILFs in my twenties. This one was really kinky and asked if it was okay to call me a certain name. I didn't mind, I was getting laid. I later found out that was the name of her son.

20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
And then they never spoke again. Please let that be the truth.

15. Hopefully Seanix9867 finished it the next day.

"Wait, you've never seen Star Wars right?" We ended up not finishing to go rent Episode IV, then found ourselves having sex in the middle of it. Good movie.

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16. FuFu_Panda's girlfriend didn't see the lack of logic behind this.

My girlfriend once said "fuck me like you are gay" I just stopped and had to check if I heard that right! Couldn't stop laughing but still managed to finish up!

20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
This girlfriend should think that one over.

17. CourageOfOthers's partner clarified their statement but the moment passed anyway.

"You fuck like a robot"

Followed immediately by apologies and, "I meant machine. You fuck like a machine" Then debate over what the funniest machine I could fuck like would be.

18. NotAGangMember offers an enlightening experience in bed.

First words after we finish...

Her: I don't think I believe in God anymore.

Me: Oh... Ok.

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19. plzacceptmyusername's woman likes to be on top of her schedule.

Asked me about my plans for next Wednesday. Was mid stroke. Stopped I think a second (cause she was serious). Then she asked me why i stopped and how close she was to cumming. Neither of us finished...tried to figure out plans

20. And the winner is this person.

Just last night, when we were finished, I had cum on my hand. So I reached over reeaaaly slowly and swiped my thumb across his forehead while whispering "Siiiimbaaaah".

20 of the weirdest things people have ever been told during sex.
Nothing is sacred anymore.
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