We've done three installments of our readers' stories of the Worst Wedding Guest they ever saw (1, 2, 3, 5), but there was enough of a response after publishing them that we're doing a fourth! From a cousin/photographer who showed up dressed for ComicCon (and then bailed) to a Romeo and Juliet style family feud, our hilarious readers generously share some of the most impressive tales of party-ruining ever seen on the internet.
1. Windy wrote in with every bride's nightmare: a bridesmaid literally thinking the entire day should have been about her.
I was asked to be a bridesmaid in my boyfriend's best friend's wedding. The bride and I had become close over the two years we've known each other and I was so excited to have been asked. Her original MOH decided that drugs were more important than her childhood friends wedding, so I was asked to step in... OF COURSE I said yes!!!
However, the groom's brother and his girlfriend were hoping that she would be asked to be MOH. After finding out that I was selected instead, the brothers girlfriend did everything she could to make things miserable. Wouldn't respond to wedding plans, refused to be part of the bachelorette party, and had a fit about any dress we chose for the bridesmaids.... apparently none of them were flattering enough for her chest area. Whatever.
Wedding day arrives, the brothers girlfriend is late, but the wedding continues without further issue.... until the reception. Where she proceeded to pull me outside and scream at me for taking her place as MOH. I told her the day wasn't about her and she got even more upset that she went to the bride and told her that she couldn't stand being so slighted, it was supposed to be HER DAY. She said this to THE BRIDE. My friend was so embarrassed and she tried so hard not to cry for the rest of the evening. I haven't heard anything from the bridesmaid, and from what I hear from the bride.... the relationship with the brother is close to an end.
2. Robin's story has a happy ending (her marriage) even if various family members tried their best to avoid that.
I had to laugh as I read through the entries submitted. I could relate to several of them.
We had a small wedding that was suppose to be outside of a Historic Tavern in a historic town in central Missouri. My soon to mother in law who did not and never has liked me wanted to help but only with what she wanted to do. She convinced us to let her handle their side of the family's invitations. Years later, we find out she never sent them. I was pregnant and we had only told my parents and my husbands brother.
The morning of the wedding, my MIL heard I was pregnant from her beautician. Needless to say, she wasn't very happy. Well the wedding is about to start and my MIL shows up in a long white lace dress. Yep, she did. Then the sky opens up for a storm of the century lol.
At this point some are saying run, bring and don't look back! So we move the wedding inside where my MIL sits in the back and smokes cigarettes through the entire ceremony. Oh but I'm not done yet. No, at the reception there is a fight between one of my relatives and one of my husbands.
My mother being worried about me being pregnant (I had been very sick and apt to pass out) had asked a couple of others to keep an eye on me. So this relative had to say mean things about my husband and only marrying me because I was carry a blankety blank baby. Of course, my husband's relative heard, and it was on.
One thing about that day.... We will never forget it haha. Happily married now for 29 years and still going!!!!
3. When Caitlin says "this is one doozy of a story, so hang on," you should believe her.
Alright, this is one doozy of a story, so hang on. My worst wedding guest would have to be my cousin.
So, my cousin is an amateur photographer who offered to photograph our wedding for us as a wedding gift. Naturally, we were touched and said yes, and made plans to pay her as a surprise gift afterwards.
A few days before the wedding she informs us she bought tickets for her and her husband and kids to go to ComicCon all four days....two of those days being our rehearsal dinner and wedding day. She also informs us they have nowhere to stay, no money, and no transportation and would be needing daily rides to and from the con (approximately an hour drive).
We offer to pay for her hotel room, as we had my handicapped uncle coming to stay with us so they wouldn't be able to, but we wouldn't be able to give rides as we would be going to and from the airport picking up family members, and then taking care of all of our last minute wedding arrangements. Somehow, they manage to secure a rental car.
Fast forward to their arrival, they chose to go costume shopping their first day here instead of coming and visiting family. The next day was our rehearsal, which we had asked her to also photograph, since we had a lot of family there that hadn't been together in years and we wanted to document it. Her family shows up 30 minutes late, she's dressed like a slutty Freddy Krueger and has no camera. My mother asked why she didn't bring it and she says in a very loud, snotty voice "nobody photographs a rehearsal, everybody knows that!" And then leaves to go off to ComicCon.
Day of wedding: she was asked to photograph the bridal party while we got ready, and was told to arrive at 12pm. At 1:30pm she texts me demanding to know why we never gave her a time, and it's cutting into her time to go to Con. Our wedding started at 5:30. How she was going to drive an hour to the Con, spend time, drive an hour back, get out of costume and make it to our wedding by 5 to set up is beyond me. I call my mom and let her know Cousin is raising hell, and mom calls my her and gives her a ration of shit, fires her and tells her not to bother arriving.
After the wedding, we discover my aunt, uncle and other cousins (THAT cousin's siblings and parents), who were supposed to arrive, mysteriously turned around at the Grand Canyon and drove to Vegas instead and blocked all of us on social media, except my dad (aunt's big brother), because he died 8months prior and she didn't have the heart to block his page.
The next morning, my husband and mother go to their hotel room, revoke payment for it and have them kicked out while they were away at Con. They also videoed the hotel room and it was trashed with dirty diapers, fast food containers, and various trash. Mom calls her to let her know she's being evicted, and Cousin goes on Facebook to say my mother is trying to steal from her! They then had my father's Facebook page memorialized so we couldn't get into it, but not before we changed all the pictures to us from the wedding, haha.
I forgot to mention, this cousin also bought us Con tickets, so we got to go on their dime those two days after the wedding where we got to meet Jason Momoa, Karl Urban and Ron Perlman, and stay another night in our hotel with the money we saved on their hotel room. Thanks, Cousin!
Oh, and my mom also happens to work for a guy who does professional photography in his spare time who photographed our whole wedding free of charge and gifted us a print of my favorite photograph from his gallery.
So, turns out the joke was on them. I got higher quality photographs, free ComicCon visits, and another night in our hotel, and my family made a running joke out of her arriving to rehearsal wearing a slutty see-through costume and her "sausage casing underwear."
4. Breanna's mother- and sister-in-law both behaved so poorly that she has no choice but to laugh.
My mother-in-law has a daughter whom she favors with the strength of a thousand suns over all her other children, including my husband. That sister doesn't like anyone "stealing her thunder" and has made a point of trying to ruin everyone of her siblings weddings.
For our wedding, she refused to be a bridesmaid when I asked. She wanted to be maid of honor, make a speech, be in tons of photos (the list goes on). My MIL blamed me for her not being in the bridal party and refused to talk to me or my husband the whole day.
This sister in law laughed when she found out our church had been damaged, stood at the front of the aisle before I walked down to try and get attention, hijacked the flower girl and ring bearer and refused to tell us where they were because they weren't her children and she therefore didn't want us to get photos with them and tried to insert herself into every photo imaginable.
The icing on the cake? She wore an ivory MINI dress, and when I say mini I mean it was so tiny it sat just above her nipples and just below her crotch. I had several people ask why she was dressed like a hooker. At the time, it annoyed me, but she made such an ass of herself I can laugh about it now.
5. "C" has the first story from inside the halls of power, but as many politicians can tell you, even the powerful have dumb relatives.
My aunt was getting married to my uncle, who is a prominent politician. He's been invited to The White House many times for holiday parties and such. Keep in mind this was in 2007, so Obama hadn't been elected yet, but my uncle was working very hard to support him in that endeavor.
My aunt's stepmother (my step-grandmother) has three kids, and her oldest son (we'll call him Mark) is just an absolute slimeball. His wife and son aren't much better, but he's the main character in this story.
Mark has what is graciously called a self-publishing company, with the stupidest name you could think of. People desperate to self-publish pay him a boatload to do so, and he takes a huge cut while scamming them all the way. One of his own books in the works was, I kid you not, "Is America Ready For a Black or Female President?" (Remember, Hillary was running then, too.) The book was literally just a single quote on each page from different friends of his, saying things like, "Yes," "No," and "I'm not sure." Total garbage.
Mark had been asking my uncle to write an introduction the book, to make it more legit. My uncle kept asking him very patiently if they could discuss this at some point after the wedding, but no. At the reception, Mark continued to hound my uncle for a commitment to writing the introduction, handed out business cards to all the guests (they say Thought Leader Architect on them, I swear I am not making this up), got drunk, and was just generally a completely obnoxious asshole.
It didn't end there. My uncle is too polite and nice to tell his new stepbrother to f*ck off. While Mark and his family live on the West Coast, they do visit the East Coast from time to time. When they're there, they call my uncle and demand favors, like getting a private tour of The White House, or getting an autographed picture of Obama, etc., even though that's not really something my uncle can get them. It will never stop.
6. Tom's wrote us two stories. In the first, the worst guests were a toss up between the mother of the bride and the father of the bride's girlfriend.
First, my wedding: Not sure who took the coveted title of worst wedding guest. My now mother in law or my father in laws gf.
MIL is very wishy-washy and changes things all the time. The day of, after my wife pretty much begged her to, she showed up to get ready with my wife and bridesmaids and was late. Previously, she picked out a dress and it was approved by my wife (she needed approval because she wears the most inappropriate outfits at times). She decided the day before to pick up a new dress. It was leopard print and relatively see-thru. The bridesmaids had to steal it and hide it and my wife had to have a stern talking to her until she put on the approved dress.
FIL gf has a little bit of a rocky relationship with the family (too much to get into). She’s very nice, but very pushy and gaudy. Well, she decided to get her hair and makeup done over an hour away from the venue, not thinking that there is this thing called Friday afternoon traffic. She was extremely late, thus FIL was late and no one picked up my wife’s brother as he was waiting, fully dressed, for a ride. MIL had to leave the wedding and pick up my new BIL, who missed the whole ceremony, and there are no family pictures with them. The FIL gf also decided to wear a dress that made it clear that her fake “headlights” were on.
6A. Tom's second story is another tie between the groom's brother and the bride's sister (nice symmetry in both stories).
Second story is my buddy's wedding: Worst guest was again a tossup.
Groom's brother never tried on his tux and they gave him the wrong tux so the wedding was delayed an hour while the tuxedo shop brought him a new tux. He then wore said tux for the ceremony only and was wearing a wife beater and jeans for the entire reception.
Bride’s sister (married to grooms brother) gave a maid of honor speech where she pretty much ran down the list of ex’s and how she liked all of them but they weren’t the right one for her.
Apparently, she did the same for the Brides first wedding as well (both were previously married). She then mentioned my buddy for about 10 seconds with the line “But (groom) we like you too and hopefully we aren’t listing you in the next speech ha. Ha. Ha.” The room awkwardly laughed.
I think the worst part though is that the bride and groom had a part in their ceremony where they put a bottle of wine, two glasses and letters to each other to read for “that first time when you want to get divorced you can drink the wine and read the letters to each other.”
First, why would you openly talk about getting divorced DURING YOUR WEDDING CEREMONY and secondly adding booze to anger is probably not the best idea. The marriage is less than a year old and she’s pregnant and they are getting divorced. Guess my buddy will be listed in a speech after all.
7. Cate has a story about an attention-hungry grandma and a rare happy usage of the phrase "second shooter."
My grandmother has always been needy for attention, so none of this was particularly surprising to those of us who knew her.
We purposely did not tell her where where I would be getting ready ahead of time with just my Mom and my brother's girlfriend because I wanted a calm, happy morning. Grandma kept calling and texting everyone all morning before the wedding - apparently someone had let it slip my brother's girlfriend would be getting ready with us and Grandma was pissed. "She's not even family, it should be me there," she lamented to everyone. She proceeded to bad mouth my brother's girlfriend all day (who is, by the way, now my fabulous sister-in-law). And she kept telling my husband all night that she would have married him as her fourth husband had she been thirty years younger.
At the ceremony, Grandma dived in the aisle as my new husband and I were recessing to wrap her arms around me, and then proceed to grab my train to carry it up the aisle, waving to everyone as she flounced off behind me. She just HAD to be in every photo!
She brought her own list of poses (some not even including either bride or groom) she wanted from the photographer and kept trying to redirect them to take her desired shots. During my father-daughter dance, she dragged one of my photographers into the bathroom to take a picture of her holding a centerpiece. My photographer was befuddled but went along with it - thankfully we had a second shooter to capture actually important stuff.
Did I mention she wore a white lace dress and brought her own bouquet? Oh yeah, class act, that one. It honestly didn't bug me though - I just shrugged at her antics and figured she was making a fool of herself.
8. Vince has a truly unique story that ends without anything really bad happening, so consider this a happy vacation from the stress of the other entries.
I was a groomsman for my friends' wedding. I was good friend's with the bride and hooked her up with the groom (if you're reading this and recognize the story, your welcome). The night before thewedding, the bride had her bachelorette party. We (the groom and groomsmen) set up the reception hall.
The bride calls me later for a ride home, which was odd at first, but I go get her. When I get there she says hi honey, hugs me and tells me to just go along with it. I didn't put it together, but she was in a male strip club. A half naked guy runs out saying it was good to see you (the bride) again. She tells me that was her ex boyfriend and the bridesmaids thought it would be funny to have him strip for her (the bride didn't find it funny at all).
The next day at the ceremony, the stripper shows up. He was respectful and a really nice guy, but the bridesmaids couldn't hold a straight face and the bride was so mad, she made the bridesmaids walk a couple miles to the reception. I told the groom about him and he thought it was hilarious.
9. Brian has a story about why you shouldn't listen to a drunk groom even if it's his big day.
I'm not sure if/how this qualifies as worst wedding guest. Backstory: 4 of us guys lived together in college and played rugby. If you've ever been to a rugby party, you know that there are a lot of "inappropriate" things that happen, including the making of toasts.
Our group had a toast in particular that has to do with honor. So the last of the four of us gets married. I'm officiating and the other two are best man and groomsman respectively. The night before the wedding, the best man and I are discussing his toast. He hasn't written anything and is honestly struggling to put his thoughts into words. I said (mistakenly), "what if you talked about honor - I honor your love, I honor your relationship, blah, blah, blah. Then you can finish the toast with 'to honor.'" (which was the beginning of a pretty inappropriate toast).
He agrees and after a wonderful beach wedding, we're all at the reception and its time for toasts. The best man does his thing and actually makes a pretty sweet toast and ends it with "to honor." The whole crowds goes, "aaaaahhhhh" at which point the groom says, "aren't you going to finish the toast." The three of us friends know that this is a bad idea, but when the groom starts in, we all join him, "To honor. To gettin' on her and staying on her. If you can't cum in her, cum on her."
Needless to say, the "aaaaahhhhhhs" turned into sounds of disgust.
10. This anonymous reader wishes she had heeded fate's warnings, but we're glad she shared her cautionary tale with us.
My first wedding, we were both really young (19 & 20), and I wish I would have listened to fate SCREAMING at me not to get married.
He was my high school sweetheart, and my parents begged me not to marry him. Being 19, I thought I knew everything and ignored them. They were still very gracious and supportive and let us marry on their property.
We couldn't find an officiant until 2 days before the wedding (bc I'm an atheist).
One of my ex's groomsmen was angry that we asked him to rent a suit ($50 bc of a special deal we got) to match the rest of the bridal party. He wouldn't speak to me for a couple weeks.
My entire bridal party showed up late to rehearsal.
My ex's sister showed up to the rehearsal (wasn't invited). We had a pinata up for my niece's birthday. She told my niece (8) to climb up in the tree and they could all just beat candy out of her instead. My sister heard her say this and of course freaked out. The next day my future sister in-law shows up in a navy blue dress (bridal party colors) and refused to change. She had originally picked out a yellow dress and showed it to me. However, she was angry that I asked her to apologize for her comment, so she chose to come in wedding colors.
The salon lost 2 of my bridesmaids' appointments (even though I had it all confirmed multiple times). People started showing up 2 hours early. I was still getting ready and they all just stood there watching and talking.
One of his groomsmen wanted to go into film, so we agreed to let him film the wedding and reception. He got there and told me he forgot his camera, but not to worry bc it's not like it's a big deal. Then as soon as the ceremony was done, he and the other groomsmen snuck off to smoke weed in my parent's barn. They were gone the rest of the night. They showed back up literally 5 minutes before we left for our hotel room.
I found out later that he spent the morning of our wedding boffing his ex gf. (Who he continued to cheat with over the course of our marriage and had already been sleeping with during the course of our 5 year relationship prior to the knot tying).
I turned the divorce papers into the courts 2 days before our 2 year anniversary. Our marriage was a terrible decision, and I wish I would have listened to the universe when it told me not to go through with it.
Moral of the story is weddings are a shit-show. Go to a courthouse, elope, trade vows secretly under the moonlight on the 4th friday of the new year, whatever. Just don't invite extra people. Most of the guests are terrible in their own way, so prepare yourself for the worst or run.
I'm very happily married now. We courthoused that bitch and invited pretty much nobody. It was a much happier day.
11. The couple in AJ's story sounds absolutely lovely, which is an achievement for the groom considering his parent.
Oh boy, have I got a winner.
I went to a coworker's wedding at the beginning of this month, and the Mother of the Groom spent the entire night throwing a full-blown passive aggressive tantrum.
Now, the bride and groom had this really sweet story of how they met. She interned in our office for a semester her senior year of college, love at first sight blah blah blah, he asked her out to dinner on her last day and they were engaged a year later. Really loving couple, clearly make each other incredibly happy.
The Mother of the Groom clearly gave zero fucks about any of that. She scowled through the entire beautiful outdoor ceremony, and made this really weird whimpering noise when he said "I do". At the reception, she refused to leave her table or toast once. Her sister tried to get her to go over for the cake cutting and another coworker heard her call the bride (a very well-educated, ambitious young woman currently finishing a graduate degree while working full time) a lazy, gold-digging bitch.
The MOH gave an incredibly touching, from the heart, and slightly intoxicated speech about how much she loved the couple, how they made each other better people, and how happy she was for them while the Momzilla spent the her toast making fun of the girl's weight.
The bride's aunt even told me that the mother gave a speech at the rehearsal which mentioned divorce three times and contained two separate anecdotes about beautiful expensive weddings that ended in break ups within a year. I saw the MOH and her boyfriend go up to Dragonlady after the send-off to tell her what a nice wedding it was, and she berated them until they practically ran away.
The best part? The groom was somehow oblivious to all of this, and doesn't understand why his new wife thinks that his mother hates her.
12. Amanda closes out this volume of Worst Wedding Guests with Shakespearean drama where the Worst was Everyone.
In college, I worked as a banquet server for a nice country club. I saw many different kinds of weddings, but there is one that sticks out the most. It started out as a hot mess. The bride and groom were taking tons of shots before their vows, and everyone seemed on edge.
Then, we find out that the bride and groom's families are feuding like Romeo and Juliet, so both sides of the families had to be separated during the entire event (seating for vows, seating for reception). Everything was divided in us vs. them.
After the vows were said, the bride and groom rushed off to the side of the country club where the bride, who was a snotty spoiled brat in my opinion, begins to chastise and curse out her new husband in front of us staff, "you know that bitch did it on purpose! Your stupid mother broke my bustle on purpose!"
Well, after all that drama it was time for the reception. Neither side spoke to each other or mingled at all during the reception. They all kept to their respective sides, separated by the dance floor. Then, when it was time for the first dance, the bride was so piss drunk she was giggling and laughing the entire dance, making a fool of herself and her new husband. She was waving her hands around, giggling, leaning back so far she almost fell backwards, and the poor groom looked so embarrassed and upset. I can almost guarantee that marriage was annulled.