Will only sell to Steve Zissou, or his first mate.

We live in Brooklyn, not far from where this "rolling tribute to Swedish automotive design" is for sale. Within walking distance is an artisanal mayonnaise shop, which is nothing but a tiny storefront, usually staffed by two skinny 24-year-olds with magnificent hair,  who spend all day sitting behind eight tiny jars of flavored mayonnaise, which you can sample on tiny spoons. The below excerpts from this enjoyable, tongue-in-cheek, so-pretentious-you-want-to-punch-the-Saab-in-its-nose Craigslist ad might seem a little over the top, but this is how you have to sell a car if you want to sell it in Brooklyn. Let's do some red-lining to take a closer look:

Sources: Craigslist | BuzzFeed