When a woman was taken off guard by her sister's new appearance, she agreed to keep the secret. That is, until Sis decided to mock her for something totally below the belt. Then the (metaphorical) punches flew and OP delivered a knockout.
Feeling guilty in the aftermath, she took to Reddit's Am I the As*hole forum to pose the question:
My sister is 34 and I'm 40, but since our early 20s people have always assumed she's the older sister. I don't know why she seems to have aged early or why I look younger - I was an alcoholic and a drug user in my 20s and probably deserve to look older. I used to joke that it was payback for her being prettier (she was and still is a total babe).
I moved away years ago and we only see each other occassionally. Last weekend I went back to our hometown for the wedding of a family friend we hadn't seen in ages, and I was shocked by her appearance.
I knew she used botox, but this was next level. Her face was puffy, her lips were super-plump, her eyes looked different and there was not a wrinkle to be seen. I asked about it straight away and she admitted she'd had her eyelids lifted and 'quite a bit of filler'. I'm cool with that - do what makes you happy.
She asked me not to tell anyone and I said of course I wouldn't. But then...
Now, I thought she looked weird because I know what she normally looks like without filters and facetune, but people from our childhood who hadn't seen us in years didn't and were saying how young she looked and asking what her secret was.
I was absolutely fine with that until she said:
'It's probably because I didn't drink and smoke my way through my 20s like [OP].'
As a recovering alcoholic who prefers people to not know, I was hurt by that. Without thinking I blurted out (louder than I'd intended): 'Oh f*ck off - it's all the plastic surgery and botox and fillers'.
I regretted it before I'd even finished saying it, but I thought she'd laugh it off and it would be fine... but she got teary and flustered and ran out of the room.
My mom thinks she was an asshole for bringing up my drinking. My brother thinks she over-reacted and should get over it. Pretty much everyone else thinks I am a massive as*hole. So, AITA (am I the as*hole)?
So, was OP justified in her attack, or did she stoop to her sister's level? The moral arbiters of Reddit have spoken, and here are their top comments:
I was totally prepared to go the other way until she pulled that. I’d argue that what she said was far worse. NTA (Not the as*hole). - Kghp11
2 wrongs don't make a right. Just because someone else is an asshole to you, doesn't make you not an asshole if you it back... ESH (Everyone sucks here). - A_FluteBoy
She said something hurtful and it is an obvious classless response to use towards a former addict and especially a sister. I’d be more upset that your sister uses your addiction against you when you’ve been bettering yourself. You are more than just a former addict. You are a person. You deserve compassion and respect. - peekabook
I'm split between NTA (not the as*hole) and ESH (everyone sucks here). She had no right to mention your disease and recovery to others, especially in a vile and demeaning way. On the other hand, you should have respected ger wish regardless of the asshole she was. That being said, your behavior sucks waaaayy less in this situation. - tracksuitlizzy
ESH, but that's OK because we're all only human. Sounds like your sister has scars deeper than those botox punctures. She said something that she's been saving up for a while. You lashed out with an excellent upper-cut that only a sister can deliver. - PumpkinRiot
Happy and safe sistering out there.