89-year-old woman takes on sword-wielding robber in single combat.

89-year-old woman takes on sword-wielding robber in single combat.
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She could have used those scissors, but that would have been no challenge at all.

Meet Miyo Koba, a Moses Lake, Washington shop owner who is too badass to be intimidated by some pathetic little three-foot sword. A robber entered her store on Monday and demanded she open the register. As you can imagine by now, Koba refused. She threatened to stab him with scissors at this point, but refrained, because a true warrior is never the first to resort to violence. 

At this point, the robber pulled out his puny three-foot blade, merely capable of running through a full-grown man. To Koba, this mere toy was no threat, and she adopted that most wily of old lady fighting styles: sitting on the floor and hacking at his shins with a golf club. In his panic, Koba forced him into a deadly error: he attempted to steal the entire register like a moron. This was especially moronic because his getaway vehicle was a BMX bike. I'm thinking he looked pretty obvious riding away with the register and wearing a mask, which is probably why he dumped it.

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In the end, the register was returned and no blood had to be shed. All according to plan.

(by Johnny McNulty)

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