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Lifehack: Do not put in pants.

I really don't want this to come off as some kind of endorsement of thievery—I would like the record to clearly show that I don't think anybody should be stealing anything from anybody—but I don't think that chainsaws make for very good shoplifting marks.

Again, please don't steal, but if you're going to shoplift something by sticking it in your pants and then casually walking out of your local hardware store, maybe choose something smaller like a screwdriver or a handful of loose wingnuts. Hell, I'll bet they won't even come running after you for a dozen or so wingnuts.

Sources: TCPalm | h/t Fortress America