NBC Washington reports that on Wednesday, the Secret Service foiled an alleged plot to kidnap the dearly beloved Bo Obama from the White House. Scott Stockert, a 49-year-old man from North Dakota, was reportedly in D.C. specifically for this kidnapping and had loaded up his truck with guns and ammunition. Before Stockert could go through with whatever he had in mind, however, Secret Service in Minnesota tipped off D.C. agents, who went to Stockert's hotel.
When questioned by Secret Service, Stockert made a number of claims about himself, including that he was Jesus Christ, the child of John F. Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe, and planning to run for president. So that makes JFK God?
Stockert was officially charged with illegally possessing a firearm, and a Superior Court judge in D.C. found cause on Friday for the case. Until it continues, the judge released Stockert and banned him from carrying weapons, real or fake. He's also not allowed to approach either the White House or Capitol, so hopefully Bo's safety is assured.
It's unclear why Stockert targeted Bo, the older of the Obamas' two Portguese Water Dogs. The logic may have had something to do with Bo's status as First Dog of the United States, the position responsible for upholding the fluffy cuteness level in the White House.