The Internet is a minefield of terrible grammar. Someecards' resident English teacher Matt Cheplic is here to clear the mines—or die trying.

Eek. Here we go.

Last year, when Michael Sam became the first openly gay player drafted by an NFL team, we all knew the story would inspire plenty of debate, speculation, overreaction, bad jokes, and some old-fashioned hate speech for good measure. But what fan of football (or bold declarations about sexuality) could have predicted this bizarre and vicious assault on the English language: