13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.
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13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

You're in an arcade. No one ever wins here.

Of all the punctuation marks out there that are used incorrectly by the Grammar Nazi-baiting English manglers of the world, the apostrophe is unquestionably the most common. Between all the errant your/you're and their/there/they're mix-ups out there, it's the Toyota Carolla of grammar mistakes. But there's another punctuation mark out there that sign-makers can't seem to get the hang of, with often disastrous results.

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

CAUTION: "Dog" may or may not be a very aggressive 8-year-old in a spiked collar.

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

These are the prices for "coffee." If you want coffee, find a Starbucks, Warren Buffett.

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

Hey man, just say you watched. We'll look the other way.

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

"We're legally required to use the quotation marks because he's been dead for seven days."

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13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

When the alarm sounds, these turn into an exclamation point.

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

"We offer the buckets, but you have to bring your own hose."

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

None of them work but at least have the common courtesy to make a "whoosh" sound.

 

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13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

To be fair, there could be quotation marks around every usage of "hotdog."

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

Someone enjoys using the font options in their word processor.  

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

A sign so unnecessary it actually makes the previous sign less effective. 

 

13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

"Oh, we definitely know CPR, but we might be busy checking Twitter or something."

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13 signs with unintentionally suspicious quotation marks.

Under no circumstances should you see them for a bathroom deal.

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