We've all done things we wouldn't write home to mom about.
Some f**ked up moments happen by accident, others, in a moment of bad decision-making or thoughtless self-absorption.
Reading about other people's f**ked up moments can be hilarious, depressing, and eye-opening, depending on the situation.
My grandmother moved in with us when I was a teenager and started to go senile. Our relationship quickly soured. Living with her was different from sending her letters and making phone calls.
It wasn't her fault. You change when you start to lose your mind. But honest to goodness I couldn't stand her. Everything was my fault. Every single thing she misplaced, I stole. I must have stolen it.
She couldn't accept that she just couldn't remember where she was putting things. The worst time she had a meltdown over photos she'd misplaced and had my parents search my room while I shouted that I never touched them.
I was a teenager. Why would I want her photos of the garden? I could just go outside if I wanted to see it, for f**k sakes.
One night, I woke up because she was shouting for me in that nasally trill she always had that I'd grown to hate because of her constant theft accusations. Just my name, over and over. She was in the bathroom across the hall from my room.
I didn't know what time it was. I figured it was early because she always got up at like 5am.
I figured she was shouting because she misplaced something again and was happily accusing me of going into her private bathroom that I never went near and taking it. So I thought some very angry choice words at her and pretended I didn't hear her.
She cawed for me for thirty or so more minutes until it finally woke up my mom. I figured there, now mom can deal with you and I can sleep. Well. Turns out her kidneys had shut down acutely.
She was vomiting and excreting blood that whole time, yelling for me - not to tell me I was a little thief again, but because she needed help. She was 85. That 30 minutes probably didn't make a difference.
But she died a few days later and while I know it wasn't my fault, her extended suffering was. I'm sorry grandma.
I’m a recovered heroin addict (9 years sober), and I have a lot of stories of how much of a s**t person I use to be. I really can’t gauge what my worst moment would be, but I can post a story or two definitely.
One day, I was flat broke and on my last bag of dope. My “neighborhood pharmacist” just recently was arrested for a DUI.
Brainstorming, I came up with an idea to try and get some pills at the ER I still had med insurance at the moment, so I thought this was my best option.
My buddy came by and we were hanging out outside smoking a cigarette and trying to figure out how to get hurt, just enough to get some pills, but not enough to actually have permanent repercussions.
There was this big a*s cinder block beside my garage and I decided to drop it on my foot in hopes of just breaking a toe at most.
I stood outside on the concrete patio for about five minutes with the cinderblock trying to hype myself up enough to drop it on my foot. I couldn’t do it, psyched myself out too much. I told my friend that he would have to do it for me, he said OK.
He held it about waist high and dropped it on my foot. I knew it wasn’t enough damage so I told him that he needed to put it up higher and drop it again, which he did.
So go to the hospital tell them that I was carrying boxes downstairs to the basement and dropped them when I slipped on the bottom step…so I go back, get x-rays, and I am in the waiting room.
Dr comes in and tells me that I’ve torn numerous ligaments in my foot and probably would hurt less if I had just broke my foot. Hearing this I was excited thinking yes I just scored.
I didn’t care about the pain at the moment just happy that I just potentially scored. They release me, and hand me a script. They wrote me a script for ibuprofen 800mg…defeat.
TLDR; don’t drop a brick on your foot trying to break it and get pills from the ER, doesn’t work.
I’m gonna rat my little sister out. During our parents’ divorce & custody battle, we were forced to sit in on family counseling sessions. I was 12 & she was 8.
We thought my Mom was acting funny & might have been banging the counselor on the side for her own personal testimonial interests(still not confirmed). So we were pissed off because we loved our Mom and our Dad.
It seemed like the counselor favored our Mom over our Dad, and it got rough sometimes watching him become outed by the only 2 adult forces who didn’t love him in this world.
ANYWAY, my little sister and I were left alone in his office, and she decided she was gonna take a s**t in his little trash can to assert dominance. It was asserted. We never went back.
Ugh this was an embarrassing one that I hope no one ever finds out. One night a few years ago, we (my boyfriend and his family) get Chinese food from our favorite little place. For some reason this night, it doesn't sit well with me.
An hour after eating I get that intensely sick feeling, like you have to poop so bad that you want to throw up. Whatever, I go upstairs and destroy the bathroom.
It's important to note, there's two bathrooms upstairs and none downstairs, which is like a little apartment where my boyfriend and I stay. After I'm sure my bowels are empty, I go back down to lay in bed.
Thought I could nap it off. Nah, about 30 seconds after laying down I get the urge to go again. I run upstairs and to my horror, both bathrooms are occupied.
His sister is refusing to get of the shower even though it's an emergency and his dad is blowing up the other toilet, presumably suffering a similar fate to mine.
I begrudgingly go sit in bed and contemplate my options as the bubbling in my gut grows worse. Bust down the bathroom door and traumatize his sister? Make the 30-minute drive home? No, it was urgent.
I even thought about sh**ting my pants (against my will) and dealing with the embarrassment. God I don't want to subject my future in-laws to that. I begrudgingly realize my only option is to go outside like nature intended.
Their yard is very open and it was a super bright-moonlit night, so there was no place to do it without feeling super exposed. Except for under the trampoline.
My thought process was: no one has used the trampoline for years, and it's out of sight/ walking range so no one could accidentally step in it. Great.
I do my business, get soaked in the process (it was slightly raining and the trampoline was POURING water on me), clean up with napkins and wet wipes, come inside. Immediately throw up in the trash can from the shock/embarrassment.
Clean that up and immediately go to bed. Everything was fine for a few days, until my boyfriend's dad lightheartedly tells me how he was late for work that morning. The dog had rolled in some s**t and he had to get a bath.
I felt like throwing up all over again, but thankfully everyone just suspected it was some type of animal poop.
Picking up a dude's head that fell off his rotting corpse when I worked at a mortuary transport company is definitely up there. Also picking up a five-year-old kid who had a book case fall on him.
Feeling all the broken bones moving in his tiny body f**ked me up good.
If we're talking behavior, I definitely attempted to ruin friend;s relationships in my teenage years cuz I was a bitter and lonely a**hole. Seeing them happy only made me feel worse so I wanted to drag them down to my level.
Luckily their relationships were stronger than my bulls**t in most cases.
EDIT: I've gotten a few messages asking questions about the mortuary job and whether or not these were the worst calls I've ever had, so I figured I'd post an old comment from a different thread. Trigger warning for suicide.
Witnessed a woman pretty much break over the headless body of her son. Used to work for a mortuary livery service.
I mostly picked up from retirement homes and from people's houses where they had a hospice nurse watching over them, but would occasionally get calls from the local coroners office.
One night I was sent out to a call not far from where I lived, place was surrounded by cops. They lead me and my partner to the bathroom, where a guy had blown his head off with a shotgun in the shower.
It was a mess, as you can probably imagine, but by this point it wasn't super out of the ordinary for me. I'd picked up suicides before, as well as overdoses, decomps, kids...so I was pretty numb to it.
We got the guy into a bag and loaded him up on the gurney, and were out the door at the worst possible time. The dude's mother was outside now, having been called by someone I guess.
She started hysterically screaming, which immediately put me on edge. I had dealt with crying and mourning loved ones every day, even when I had to pick up the kid, his parents were already ushered into another room.
But blood curdling screams right in front of me? This was a first. A cop tried to grab her but she managed to wriggle away from him, running up to the gurney and pretty much collapsing onto it, sobbing uncontrollably and babbling nonsense.
It was the most raw and unfiltered emotion I had ever seen. She was clutching onto the gurney and like rocking back and forth, to the point that I had to grab the cart before the whole thing toppled over onto the front lawn.
I stood there for around five minutes, with a front row seat to unrivaled agony with no way to really hide from it, before a cop had stepped in and tried to pull her away, saying that we had to take him.
She eventually relented and we got the body loaded into the car, and from there it was business as usual. The reason that one stuck with me so much is because, well, it was almost like looking into my own future.
I was suicidal at the time, and a shotgun in the shower was exactly how I planned to do it. Only reason I was waiting was because I wanted to be in my own place, so my roommate didn't have to find me. The dude was even around my age.
It was a weird feeling of almost like standing over my own body, and when I saw the woman's breakdown, I could only see my own mom. It was at that moment that I decided that my mom would never scream and cry like that because of me.
While the feelings are definitely still there and I still think about death a lot, that night was when I decided that I would never do it, no matter how much it hurts. What sucks is that it almost made the pain worse.
Before, I knew I had an out, a way to make this miserable s**t end, but after that I just felt trapped. Don't want to live but now I can't die. F*ck lol.
You know how people bag up their leaves and leave them out by the street? As a teen we used to go out at night and dump them back out on people's lawns. Thinking about it now I would be so pissed if someone did that to me.
My hometown is generally pretty middle-class to poor. There's a bunch of rich people that live in the woods and one of them had a kid that went to our highschool and bullied the f*ck out of the kids that weren't as wealthy.
That sh**head grew up and bought a Camaro last summer and removed the muffler so it would be the loudest f*cking thing in town.
On new years eve of 2021, he decided to ruin a town tradition and lapped the town common with it during the tree lighting ceremony. while people were caroling and giving thanks.
Summer of last year, me and a friend decided it was time to get revenge because nobody wanted to do anything about it. My friend's dad owned a junkyard and they recently got an old train horn from a busted diesel that ended up there.
We spent a good week getting it set up in the back of his work truck and decided to wait on it for a little while.
A month or so later, we found out he was having a party of some kind with other rich folks and his family but we didn't know what it was about, so we carefully parked outside his house on the opposite side of his fence.
Right as it was starting, we blasted the train horn and peeled out before anyone knew what happened. News got out later and we found out the party we bombed was actually a wake for his late grandfather.
When I was about 15 a neighbor or ours stopped us in the road and chewed us out for riding our go carts in the road. This despite the fact that it was a dirt road in a rural area which was the perfect place for riding go carts.
He was a complete a**hole about it too. I don't know where I got the idea from but I promptly went home, called the electric company, pretended to be the neighbor, and told them I wanted my electricity turned off as we were moving.
It was the eighties so they just looked the account up by name and address and promptly entered my request in the system. I'm sure it was just a minor inconvenience for them but they deserved it in my opinion.
You’re all disgusting. Anyways I made the Pringles can a fleshlight once.
Sometimes you can do really f**ked up things without any intent or awareness.I was young and with a very nice woman who was struggling with some physical issues that resulted in a severe depression.
We weren't living together, but I was regularly getting up early and going over to her place for breakfast and to kind of just check in and let her know I was there for her. I went drinking with some friends one night and I overslept the next morning.
I called her to let her know I wouldn't make it. She committed suicide that day, before I got back from work. I know, now, that what happened wasn't my fault, and I wasn't responsible, at least not in some overt way - we all make our own decisions.
Still, I will always wish I hadn't been careless and overslept that day. If I had the chance to change one decision I've made in my life, this would be it.
The roommates of my girlfriend were making her life very difficult (leaving garbage rotting in her room while on vacation, piercing our condoms and more). I used to pee on their bath sponges. Never told them.
One time, a girl I had minimal interest in, but had mutual shared friends with had sent me a text basically saying, “I have feelings for you and I’d like to explore where that takes us.”
I then typed up a message to my good friend saying, “Please kill me now, I think she wants a relationship.” Keep in mind, this girl was nice and all, but just wasn’t my type.
I’m also a people pleaser, so the thought of having to turn down someone makes me uncomfortable and I dreaded having to tell her I wasn’t interested. I’ve been turned down before. It sucks.
I don’t want to do that to someone else. I did not mean the “please kill me now” as a knock on her as a person, but as a “I don’t want to be in this situation.' You can probably guess what happened though.
Yep, I sent the “please kill me now” text to the girl.
After immediately realizing what I did and thinking for about 30 seconds how I could possibly talk my way out of not sounding like the biggest jerk in the entire world, I realized that there was no good way to spin that.
I decided to just try my best to explain to her that it wasn’t meant to be mean and blah blah blah. I also said that she didn’t deserve that blah blah blah. Didn’t matter. I still cringe about it to this day.
My mom's boyfriend is a d*ck so I used his beard trimmer to shave my nuts. A few times.
Made an unwarranted nasty comment about one of my closest friends in an effort to seem cool…and she was sitting right there across the room, heard it, went red in the face, and looked like she was about to cry.
I wanted to die right then and there and I would have deserved it.
It should be noted that I was a seventh-grade pubescent s**thead at the time. It was a dim chapter of which I’m not the least bit proud. Yes, I begged her forgiveness (which I didn’t deserve but she nevertheless gave me).
Yes, it still haunts me.
And yes, I very much learned my lesson, one I hope to pass on to my son by being just as brutally honest with him about the very sh***y thing I did to another human being. Friend or foe, it was a super wrong, super not-good thing to do.
My grandpa retired early due to disability and watched me during the day all summer until I was 11-12 and could chill alone after school. He spoiled the s**t out of me. Took me to amusement parks, brought me to toy stores, all sorts of stuff.
My parents told him to dial it back because I was being an entitled s**t to them when I was 6-7. After this happened, I told my grandpa I wanted to go to the amusement park one day.
He told me that my parents said no but maybe we could go next week or the week after. I got incredibly upset. Being the manipulative sociopath I was, I put on the waterworks.
He just said he was sorry and that he didn't want to upset my parents. So I looked at him and said, 'You just don't love me anymore, do you?' He got really sad after I said that and told me that he loved me very much but we couldn't go.
So I just kept going. 'Why don't you love me?' Every time I said it, he got more and more distraught. Then he started to cry. I made my 56-year-old grandfather cry. The sweetest man I've ever known.
The image of him crying while saying 'Please don't say things like that,' is so deeply seared in my mind. I think it was one of the most important moments of my childhood as far as my emotional development.
At the time I couldn't process it immediately. I didn't even apologize, I just went to my room. He didn't even tell my parents what happened. My mom said that around that time, it seemed like I matured a decade.
I was quiet, polite, and incredibly well-behaved. I treated my grandpa much nicer from that point forward.
I couldn't bring myself to apologize for it until in my late teens when he was dying of cancer and I found out that he wasn't even blood-related to me. He was my mom's step-dad.
Just one of the best people humanity could offer and I owe so much of who I've become to him.
Edit: Thank you for the kind words every one. I'm not an outwardly emotional person but I cried a bit writing this in my office. I appreciate the shed tears on mine and my grandpa's behalf.
Edit: Some people are asking about what he said when I apologized, I mentioned it in a couple comments but he didn't remember what I was talking about when I brought it up.
He wasn't the type of person to hold onto something like that. He just laughed and told me that I shouldn't have dwelled on it for so long.