5. Liam Hemsworth, because he's getting divorced and his ex Miley Cyrus already has another woman. Not Chris, the other one. ShutterstockAustralian hunk and star of multiple action franchises Liam Hemsworth, not to be confused with his brother Australian hunk and star of multiple action franchises Chris Hemsworth, is getting divorced.Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus announced over the weekend that they are divorcing after eight months of marriage, and Miley already has a rebound. If this reality TV-ready drama wasn't already juicy enough, of course there is some sort of Kardashian konnection, and the woman Miley was spotted hooking up with is Kaitlynn Carter, who is *inhale* Caitlyn Jenner's son Brody's ex-wife *exhale.*The two were spotted making out on a boat in Italy, a very Hot Girl Summer move.Miley Cyrus and Kaitlynn Carter left their husbands for each other. 2019 has peaked. pic.twitter.com/nkMOKiECxY— Hanna Ines Flint (@HannaFlint) August 12, 2019 Meanwhile, Hemsworth flew home to Sydney to mourn his marriage in peace, and was approached by the paparazzi at a frozen yogurt stand."You don’t understand what it’s like," he told Daily Mail Australia when asked about the divorce. "I don’t want to talk about it, mate."According to the tabloid, Hemsworth was wearing sweatpants, so you KNOW that he's going through a hard time.Sounds like this guy could use a rebound. Any volunteers?Lionsgate4. Bill and Hillary Clinton, because the president is accusing them of murder. "Hail Hydra"? ShutterstockThe nineties are back, baby! Right-wing fringe figures are spreading conspiracy theories about a "Clinton body count." This time, rather than have the subject of the conspiracy theories occupy the Oval Office, the president is a conspiracy theorist himself!After billionaire pedophile sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein was found dead in his Manhattan jail cell, people on both sides of the aisle immediately suspected foul play. How could the nation's most high-profile non-Paul Manafort prisoner commit suicide, weeks after a suicide attempt? Wasn't the link between a bipartisan cabal of upper-class sex criminals, who knows the secrets of the world's most powerful, on suicide watch?While Attorney General William Barr (whose dad just so happens to be a buddy of Epstein's) insists that Epstein successfully committed suicide thanks to prison guard incompetence, the internet rallied to blame one of two sex pest presidents: Bill Clinton or Donald Trump.A #ClintonBodyCount hashtag popped up, as did a #TrumpBodyCount one in response. MAGA Twitter insisted that the latter's popularity is proof that Twitter is biased against them.My God, theyโre already covering it up. Twitter has completely replaced the hashtag #ClintonBodyCount with #TrumpBodyCount on the trending newsfeed even though the numbers were higher. The media bias is UNREAL at this point. pic.twitter.com/38QBO7HBIB— Mindy Robinson ๐บ๐ธ (@iheartmindy) August 10, 2019 Trump, for his part, retweeted a conspiracy theory blaming the Clintons for Epstein's death. The claim is unsubstantiated, and would be quite shocking for a sitting president to make if "shock" was still a thing.You really think that Bill and Hillary Clinton could conspire to assassinate a prisoner, when they couldn't even figure out how to conspire to win the 2016 election? Even Donald Trump was able to figure that out.Rather than blame one another's sexual predators-in-chief, Americans should come together and unite to condemn the real suspect: Queen Elizabeth II. 3. Drug dealer Jermaine Taylor and the people who mocked his hair, because they're all wanted by the police. Whatever you do, do NOT go to the police's page and call this criminal Krusty the Clown. Gwent PoliceAlas, I shall tread lightly, lest I offend the Welsh.When police in south Wales posted a photo to Facebook of a drug dealer they're hoping to capture, people proceeded to have a laugh in the comments about the fugitive's unfortunate hairdo. The BBC reports: People can be prosecuted for posting offensive messages online. One contributor joked that police should look in Edinburgh, which hosts the fringe festival, while another said officers were "combing the area". On Monday, Gwent Police said: "We're really grateful to everyone who is assisting us in locating Jermaine Taylor, and we must admit a few of these comments have made us laugh. "However, when the line is crossed from being funny to abusive, we do have to make sure we are responsible and remind people to be careful about what they write on social media." Whatever you do, don't go on social media and call the Welsh police "snowflakes."2. Caitlyn Jenner, because doesn't know which kid is which. "I have six kids, you expect me to be able to tell them apart?" ShutterstockYou're not the only one who gets the identical animatronic FemBots known as Kardashians konfused...even Kendall and Kylie's own parent couldn't tell the difference.Caitlyn Jenner just messed up and posted pics of Kendall for Kylieโs birthday post. The post was removed less than 15 minutes later. pic.twitter.com/eox9qyCXHj— อ๐ผ๐๐ ๐ (@collard_greens) August 10, 2019 Caitlyn Jenner celebrated Kylie's birthday last weekend with pictures of Kendall, who is a different person.The proud parent shared four throwback pictures, all of which feature Kendall (not the birthday girl) instead of Kylie (the birthday girl).Make the mistake in one picture, fine, babies are all squishy and look somewhat similar anyway. But, fail to identify your child at various stages of life? That is....not good.The "save" included pictures of both daughters, doubling the chances that one of them will be the correct person. View this post on Instagram Happy birthday @kyliejenner A post shared by Caitlyn Jenner (@caitlynjenner) on Aug 10, 2019 at 7:50am PDTIt's Jenner's most embarrassing public mistake since she supported Trump, who went on to ban transgender people from the military and systematically dismantle LGBTQ rights.An "oop" for the ages.1. The German fugitive who got caught after jumping into a wasp's nest. He would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling wasps! ShutterstockThe Associated Press reports that a 32-year-old German man was ensnared in a literal sting operation when he jumped off a balcony to avoid being captured by police and landed straight onto a pile of wasps.In what sounds straight out of a slapstick silent film, the fugitive was attacked by the insects, and as cops tried to apprehend him, they were attacked by wasps as well.Ultimately, the guy broke free from both the wasps and the fuzz but jumped into an inflatable pool, where he was promptly arrested.Marvel Studios Another successful crime bust from the Wasp herself, Hope Van Dyne.
