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Bride bans brother from wedding after he attempts to post 'elopement photos.' AITA?

Bride bans brother from wedding after he attempts to post 'elopement photos.' AITA?


Ideally, your wedding is a big party where you get to let your hair down and have some fun after months of non-stop logistics and planning. But not all families make that possible. Weddings bring up a lot of big feelings around love and attention, and not all friend and family groups know how to let other people have their day.

Case in point, in a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she was wrong for kicking her brother out of her wedding after he tried to take his own wedding pictures there.

She wrote:

AITA for not allowing my brother and his wife to take wedding pictures on MY wedding?

Excuse any grammar mistakes, English is not my first language. I’m gonna write the names and ages first to make it easy to understand:

Husband and I - 34,35. Brother (Jack) and SIL (Hannah)- 22,24

My husband and I recently got married. About a week before the event, Jack and Hannah asked if they could take their wedding pictures as well after our ceremony, and during the reception.

I asked if they meant when everything was over but they clarified that they wanted people in the pictures. The reason for their request was that they eloped, so they didn’t get to have the whole wedding experience.

They wanted the pictures to show their future kids and hang in their future home. I can understand why they would want that, so I told them that they could take pictures but either before the events or after the guests had left.

That’s because they planned to come dressed in wedding attire and I didn’t want them to be wearing that during the wedding. They tried to convince me to change my mind but I stood my ground.

They ended up saying that they didn’t want to take them anymore. I thought nothing of it and just carried on with my life. But then, the day of the wedding they arrived with a photographer and Hannah was wearing a long white dress.

The guests had already arrived, so I told my MOH to please tell them to change clothes. Hannah and Jack refused so the groomsmen kicked them out. After the wedding, my mother asked where they were and I told her.

She agreed that they shouldn’t have done it but that I could have let it slide since they were already here. She also said that everyone who attended the wedding knew who the couple was, so it’s not like they would’ve caused any confusion.

I‘m beginning to feel bad because they just wanted to have nice memories and pictures to show in the future and I ruined it for them. My husband and MOH say that I did nothing wrong but I feel like they’re biased. AITA? If I am I’ll apologize and offer to pay them back for the photographer.

The internet weighed in with thoughts and support.

crabrry wrote:

NTA. You offered them way more than I would’ve, yet they decided to try and screw you over. Don’t worry about it OP, and congrats on your wedding!

mizerychik wrote:

They were trying to steal your wedding, quite literally. They saved a pile of money by eloping and then tried to actually have a wedding that they didn't have to pay for by stealing the limelight from you and your husband.

Your brother intentionally tried to f**k you over for his own selfish reasons. They are deeply narcissistic, cheap, trash people. Do not ever apologize. They owe you an apology, and you would be fully within your rights to not accept it.

up_your_bass wrote:

NTA! You were more than generous in offering them the chance to take photos before or after the wedding. The level of entitlement they have to ask to take photos in their wedding outfits during your wedding celebration is astounding.

If you elope, surely you are actively choosing to not partake in that side of things anyway? Good on you for standing your ground OP.

DespicableRhodiumFox wrote:

You are absolutely NTA. They chose to elope, that was their decision, not yours. They could have opted for a nice big ceremony with lots of guests and photos etc.

You were accommodating enough by saying they could take the pictures after your ceremony, minus the guests. The fact they turned up and tried to upstage you at your own wedding is despicable.

The fact they refused to change clothes when asked is beyond words. Having the groomsmen kick them out was absolutely the right reaction. They didn’t respect you, your husband or your wedding. They owe you an apology, not the other way around. They’re the AH’s, NOT you.

The fact that OP is even asking if she is TA in this situation might speak to how routinely entitled and manipulative the brother is.

Sources: Reddit
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