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<p>Supporting a friend&#39;s relationship can be tough when you have different philosophies about love, gender, and power dynamics. Ideally, everyone will love each other&#39;s partners and you can support your friend&#39;s relationships honestly. But differences of opinion can easily crop up, which presents the question of whether it&#39;s best to keep your mouth shut or speak your piece.</p><p>In most cases, it&#39;s best to make your opinion known before you commit to being in someone&#39;s wedding, but life isn&#39;t always that cut and dry.</p><h2>In a recent post on <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/dz2kkb/aita_for_calling_out_my_best_friends_hypocrisy/" target="_blank">the Am I The A*shole subreddit</a>, a woman asked if she&#39;s wrong for confronting her bride-to-be BFF about relationship hypocrisy right before the wedding.</h2><p> </p><blockquote> <p>AITA for calling out my best friend&#39;s hypocrisy right before her wedding?</p> </blockquote><h2>OP kicked off the post by sharing that she&#39;s going to be in her friend Becca&#39;s wedding in a couple days.</h2><p>Coincidentally, OP&#39;s boyfriend also proposed a few days ago - making their wedding time frames relatively close.</p><blockquote> <p>I am maid of honor for my best friend Becca and the wedding is in a few days. Coincidentally, my boyfriend Tom proposed to me a few days ago. I asked Becca if she&#39;d like to be my maid of honour, and she refused on a &#39;&#39;matter of principle&#39;&#39;.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>However, despite their closeness, OP shared that Becca is adamantly against her relationship because her fiance Tom is younger and less moneyed.</h2><blockquote> <p>Becca is a lovely person, but she has extremely traditional views. Her fiance is a lovely man, but is 10 years older than her (her and I are both 30), very handsome, and probably earns about 5x as much as she does. Becca is very much a &#39;&#39;date up not down&#39;&#39; sort of woman. I have no problem with this at all. Tom, meanwhile, is 6 years younger than me. Gorgeous and makes a decent income, but I still out earn him considerably.</p> </blockquote><h2>Since the dawn of OP&#39;s relationship, Becca has made it very clear that she disapproves because they don&#39;t fit into &quot;traditional gender roles.&quot;</h2><blockquote> <p>Ever since Tom and I have been dating, Becca has constantly (and LOUDLY) voiced her disapproval. To her an older woman and a younger man is &#39;&#39;unnatural&#39;&#39; and a woman shouldn&#39;t earn more than her husband as he is supposed to be the &#39;&#39;provider&#39;&#39;.</p> </blockquote><h2>Needless to say, when OP announced her engagement at Becca&#39;s wedding planning session, Becca made it crystal clear she wouldn&#39;t accept the role of maid of honor because it&#39;s a &quot;matter of principle.&quot;</h2><blockquote> <p>I announced my engagement at our wedding planning session yesterday evening, and asked Becca if she&#39;d like the Maid of Honour job. She refused which I respect, but without my asking gave her reason: That she doesn&#39;t support me marrying Tom and never will.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>OP became angry and called out Becca for her hypocrisy before storming out.</h2><blockquote> <p>I was furious and called her out on her hypocrisy. She tried to get in her usual &#39;&#39;but it&#39;s DIFFERENT when the guy is older&#39;&#39; but I didn&#39;t want to hear it. I stormed out in tears.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Tom is the most lovely guy I&#39;ve ever met. He treats me like a princess, makes me feel like the most special person in the world. For years now I&#39;ve bit my tongue as Becca spits her vile views in my face, and I&#39;m sick of it. She humiliated me in front of the entire bridal party.</p> </blockquote><h2>Since the fight happened so soon before Becca&#39;s wedding, OP is now unsure where this leaves them.</h2><blockquote> <p>I&#39;m not sure where this leaves the wedding now. I will always be Becca&#39;s friend and want to be there on her big day, so I don&#39;t know if I chose a bad time to confront her on her behaviour.</p> </blockquote><h2><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/dz2kkb/aita_for_calling_out_my_best_friends_hypocrisy/" target="_blank">OthrMothr22402</a> thinks Becca&#39;s views suck but OP&#39;s lack of backbone when it comes to her partner also sucks.</h2><blockquote> <p>ESH - you for allowing your friend to constantly badmouth your SO and not stick up for him or shut her down and then turn around and ask her to be instrumental in your wedding. Becca for being a sexist piece of trash.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/dz2kkb/aita_for_calling_out_my_best_friends_hypocrisy/" target="_blank">zukka924</a> thinks that OP should dip out of Becca&#39;s wedding.</h2><blockquote> <p>NTA Becca f*cking sucks. Honestly I would consider dropping out of her wedding if I were you. But that&#39;s just me!</p> <p>Anyways, CONGRATS ON GETTING ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> </blockquote><h2><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/dz2kkb/aita_for_calling_out_my_best_friends_hypocrisy/" target="_blank">YourFeelsMatterNot</a> thinks it&#39;s bonkers that OP even wanted Becca in the wedding.</h2><blockquote> <p>ESH</p> <p>Her for obvious reasons.</p> <p>You for putting up with this. Why would you even ask her to be Maid of Honour? She clearly has disdain for your partner, if she can&#39;t support you in your relationship then why have her there at all?</p> </blockquote><h2><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/CatelynsCorpse/">CatelynsCorpse</a> thinks OP needs to seriously sort out who she prioritizes in her life.</h2><blockquote> <p>ESH except for Tom and maybe Becca&#39;s future husband, too.</p> <p>I don&#39;t know where the hell she gets off trying to tell you who you should and shouldn&#39;t date. Her opinions on relationships are backwards and old-fashioned, but she&#39;s (unfortunately) allowed to think that way. What she is not allowed to do is shit all over her friend and her friend&#39;s choice of a partner...so why do you put up with that shit? Who you date/marry is YOUR choice. Honestly, Becca is NOT a good friend to you, full stop.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>You suck, too, though, for not only tolerating this shit from her but also for asking her to be your Maid of Honor when she disrespects your fiancee and bashes your relationship. Why would you want someone who disrespects your partner to be a part of the most important day of both of your lives? That makes no sense whatsoever, and it&#39;s really not fair to Tom, either.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Personally, I think Becca sounds toxic AF and am not really sure why you want to.</p> </blockquote><p>Hopefully this thread full of concerned strangers serves as a wake up call to OP that Becca is in fact not a friend, but a toxic waste of energy.</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Bride who thinks her maid-of-honor's fiance is too young and unsuccessful refuses to be in her wedding.

Supporting a friend&#39;s relationship can be tough when you have different philosophies about love, gender, and power dynamics. Ideally, everyone will love each other&#39;s partners and you can support your friend&#39;s relationships honestly. But differences of opinion can easily crop up, which presents the question of whether it&#39;s best to keep your mouth shut or speak your piece.In most cases, it&#39;s best to make your opinion known before you commit to being in someone&#39;s wedding, but life isn&#39;t always that cut and dry.In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a woman asked if she&#39;s wrong for confronting her bride-to-be BFF about relationship hypocrisy right before the wedding.  AITA for calling out my best friend&#39;s hypocrisy right before her wedding? OP kicked off the post by sharing that she&#39;s going to be in her friend Becca&#39;s wedding in a couple days.Coincidentally, OP&#39;s boyfriend also proposed a few days ago - making their wedding time frames relatively close. I am maid of honor for my best friend Becca and the wedding is in a few days. Coincidentally, my boyfriend Tom proposed to me a few days ago. I asked Becca if she&#39;d like to be my maid of honour, and she refused on a &#39;&#39;matter of principle&#39;&#39;. However, despite their closeness, OP shared that Becca is adamantly against her relationship because her fiance Tom is younger and less moneyed. Becca is a lovely person, but she has extremely traditional views. Her fiance is a lovely man, but is 10 years older than her (her and I are both 30), very handsome, and probably earns about 5x as much as she does. Becca is very much a &#39;&#39;date up not down&#39;&#39; sort of woman. I have no problem with this at all. Tom, meanwhile, is 6 years younger than me. Gorgeous and makes a decent income, but I still out earn him considerably. Since the dawn of OP&#39;s relationship, Becca has made it very clear that she disapproves because they don&#39;t fit into &quot;traditional gender roles.&quot; Ever since Tom and I have been dating, Becca has constantly (and LOUDLY) voiced her disapproval. To her an older woman and a younger man is &#39;&#39;unnatural&#39;&#39; and a woman shouldn&#39;t earn more than her husband as he is supposed to be the &#39;&#39;provider&#39;&#39;. Needless to say, when OP announced her engagement at Becca&#39;s wedding planning session, Becca made it crystal clear she wouldn&#39;t accept the role of maid of honor because it&#39;s a &quot;matter of principle.&quot; I announced my engagement at our wedding planning session yesterday evening, and asked Becca if she&#39;d like the Maid of Honour job. She refused which I respect, but without my asking gave her reason: That she doesn&#39;t support me marrying Tom and never will. OP became angry and called out Becca for her hypocrisy before storming out. I was furious and called her out on her hypocrisy. She tried to get in her usual &#39;&#39;but it&#39;s DIFFERENT when the guy is older&#39;&#39; but I didn&#39;t want to hear it. I stormed out in tears.  Tom is the most lovely guy I&#39;ve ever met. He treats me like a princess, makes me feel like the most special person in the world. For years now I&#39;ve bit my tongue as Becca spits her vile views in my face, and I&#39;m sick of it. She humiliated me in front of the entire bridal party. Since the fight happened so soon before Becca&#39;s wedding, OP is now unsure where this leaves them. I&#39;m not sure where this leaves the wedding now. I will always be Becca&#39;s friend and want to be there on her big day, so I don&#39;t know if I chose a bad time to confront her on her behaviour. OthrMothr22402 thinks Becca&#39;s views suck but OP&#39;s lack of backbone when it comes to her partner also sucks. ESH - you for allowing your friend to constantly badmouth your SO and not stick up for him or shut her down and then turn around and ask her to be instrumental in your wedding. Becca for being a sexist piece of trash. zukka924 thinks that OP should dip out of Becca&#39;s wedding. NTA Becca f*cking sucks. Honestly I would consider dropping out of her wedding if I were you. But that&#39;s just me! Anyways, CONGRATS ON GETTING ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YourFeelsMatterNot thinks it&#39;s bonkers that OP even wanted Becca in the wedding. ESH Her for obvious reasons. You for putting up with this. Why would you even ask her to be Maid of Honour? She clearly has disdain for your partner, if she can&#39;t support you in your relationship then why have her there at all? CatelynsCorpse thinks OP needs to seriously sort out who she prioritizes in her life. ESH except for Tom and maybe Becca&#39;s future husband, too. I don&#39;t know where the hell she gets off trying to tell you who you should and shouldn&#39;t date. Her opinions on relationships are backwards and old-fashioned, but she&#39;s (unfortunately) allowed to think that way. What she is not allowed to do is shit all over her friend and her friend&#39;s choice of a partner...so why do you put up with that shit? Who you date/marry is YOUR choice. Honestly, Becca is NOT a good friend to you, full stop.  You suck, too, though, for not only tolerating this shit from her but also for asking her to be your Maid of Honor when she disrespects your fiancee and bashes your relationship. Why would you want someone who disrespects your partner to be a part of the most important day of both of your lives? That makes no sense whatsoever, and it&#39;s really not fair to Tom, either.  Personally, I think Becca sounds toxic AF and am not really sure why you want to. Hopefully this thread full of concerned strangers serves as a wake up call to OP that Becca is in fact not a friend, but a toxic waste of energy.

Bride who thinks her maid-of-honor's fiance is too young and unsuccessful refuses to be in her wedding.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a woman asked if she's wrong for confronting her bride-to-be BFF about relationship hypocrisy right before the wedding.

OP kicked off the post by sharing that she's going to be in her friend Becca's wedding in a couple days.