Unless you're working your absolute dream job (and maybe even then some days), we all have moments where we fantasize about an epic quitting power-move.
Whether it's your first job or your last, whether you get minimum wage or six figures, sometimes if an authority figure, a client, or a customer treats you poorly, you want to burn the place down. One wrong comment can cause years of feeling underpaid, disrespected, or underappreciated to bubble right to the surface and overflow into a "go ahead, fire me" rage.
A recent Reddit thread explored the question, "What's your best 'fire me I fucking dare you, moment?' and users delivered. Granted, it might remind you of your first job nightmares (I see you fancy soap company that fired me over refusing to give un-gloved "foot treatments" to sweaty flip-flopped, summer tourists for nine dollars an hour before tax), but it's inspiring when people choose happiness over a temporary paycheck. R.I.P, my job at a sandwich shop where I stood outside in an inflatable fountain drink costume. R.I.P, my job at a gourmet cupcake shop where I had to lie about what "baked fresh daily," means.
My dog became very ill quite suddenly and he needed to be put down, I was at work and I asked to leave half and hour early so I could be there for him. I asked my manager and she got annoyed and said there was "no way" and that I should have told her earlier. I said "I'm sorry I didn't realize my dog was going to die" in the most sarcastic way possible then walked away knowing she'd follow me, I then stood at my desk and typed my resignation up infront of her.
She gave me the time off.
No one was going to stop me from being there for my boy.
2. "Sadmanwithabox" dishes on some sandwich drama.
Yep. I worked at a certain "super quick" sandwich delivery place for a little while, and they would always try to pull this shit. I would call and tell them I'm sick and they'd say if I couldnt find someone to cover and didnt come in I would get written up. Except when it comes to a restaurant, even slightly encouraging a sick employee to come in is FUCKED UP. And that doesnt even get into the part where I make minimum wage and it's really just not my fucking job to find a replacement for my shift. If it is my job, I expect far more than minimum wage.
A couple times I just stayed home anyway and let them write me up. Sometimes without even attempting to find a replacement. I knew I was fucking good at the job and they needed me too much to fire me. Then one day, i was super sick. Like, puking for hours sick. I called in, they fired me for it. I called up the health department and told them that this company had tried to coerce me into working while sick multiple times, and that I knew they did it to other employees as well. The health department started sending someone in there once a week or so to just see if anyone looked sick. I doubt anything ever came of it, but it felt good to retaliate.
3. Don't mess with "Wrestlecuck's" money.
For the past few years I’ve worked at one of the “nicer” restaurants in my small beach town. I’m one of the only servers there who cares about doing a good and I’m the only one who doesn’t take a smoke break every 15 minutes. This past summer a new, very illegal, rule was implemented that if we messed up an order in anyway we would be liable to pay for that messed up food. I usually didn’t have a problem with mess ups so I didn’t bring up the legality of this matter since I make good money and don’t want to start fires in places that don’t concern me. That until I rang in a ‘Cherry Glazed Burger’ instead of a ‘Cherry Glazed Steak’ (each stylized CGB and CGS in our shitty computer system) I fixed this with the kitchen, but not before they had already started the burger. I told my manager and she just gave me a disappointed and told me that the rules are the rules. I then dived into both federal and state workers rights code and told her she would never see me again if I found any money out of my tips at the end of the night. Never had a problem fixing an order again.
4. Perhaps a blessing in disguise for "Ladycuntsworth."
Something similar happened to me. I was working in a bar during my undergrad and I had to take a 4 week field course to graduate. Understandably, its a pita for them since its a long time but I told them well in advance and they didnt care then and they had plenty of bar staff to cover. Of course when the time comes around for me to leave they start giving me shit and saying how I must not care about the bar, why cant i stay, etc etc. Obviously I have to take this class so I left, but they never scheduled me when I got back. That place was a fratty nightmare though, I wasnt upset about it.
5. "Sonofabunch" can sell without pushing.
Worked for Radioshack and always butted heads with the District Manager. He wanted me to use these ridiculous sales techniques that might work in a big city but were really pushy. The year he became our DM I won a contest for best salesman in the whole company, out of about 14,000 employees, and I did it without being pushy and forcing stuff on people. He still tried to get me to use these ridiculous techniques each month when he would visit, but after I won the contest I stopped sugar coating it and would flat out tell him "that's stupid, I'm not going to do it that way."
6. "Consory_oflady_vader" lays down the law.
I'm a speech therapist. I work in a skilled nursing facility. For the most part.....they all suck. This is no exception. But the place I used to work, the boss was a scumbag. To the extent that the entire rehab staff signed a letter asking to get him fired. He was basically forced out, I eventually left, and came to my current job. I swung by the rehab gym and.....saw his ass sitting in my current boss's office. I kind of froze in shock..... I thought he was interviewing for a job there. So I went to the boss at the time and told her flat out that if he got hired.....I was walking out immediately. She got a stunned look on her face, and quickly assured me that he wasn't working there. That was my first time drawing a line in the sand like that.
7. Let "Tucorazon" get married!
I was working at a shoe store in a mall and I requested a week in August off for my wedding. My manager told me her boss wasn’t happy about that and all I said was “my wedding is more important than back to school sales.” They didn’t “fire” me, per se, they just stopped scheduling me and eventually my access to the employee website went away.
8. "X_mas_ape" knows how to negotiate a salary.
First kitchen I worked in, they told me, the more jobs I learned, the more I'd get paid (came in basically knowing all of it anyway). 6 months later I had learned every job there except 1 spot. They told me if i learned that spot, I'd get a raise, I told them I could find a new kitchen (i was easily one of the best employees there), and that i was told the more i learned the more id get paid, and i still hadn't been given a raise. Head Chef cracked and gave me a raise. I told him 50 cents wasn't enough. He was forced to give me another.
2 weeks after that, they fired the banquet chef's assistant (we had a lot of 300+ people events) and told him to pick his new assistant, he immediately requested me. I told them i needed another raise, I was told no again, again I said I'll find a new job, came in the next day and put my 2 weeks in (yup, found a job that quick) Wound up making more money in that kitchen than anyone beside the banquet chef and the head chef.
That's how i wound up getting 3 raises in a month.
9. This is why "Mjdillaha" knows the minimum wage should be increased.
I worked a Burger King as a teenager. One day, the assistant manager, who illegally brought her teenage daughter to work to help her out, asked me to clean the restrooms. It wasn’t my normal job but I didn’t mind. I had a good attitude about it and prepared to go clean the bathrooms.
I walked into the men’s room and discovered that the reason she asked me to do it was because someone shit all over the bathroom. Smeared fecal matter on the walls, the sink, the floor, the outside of the toilet. The toilet was clogged and hand wet, used toilet paper inside of at and all over the room. It was a complete disaster.
I walked out of the bathroom, went back to the kitchen and told the assistant manager “I’m not cleaning that. You can fire me but I’m not cleaning it.” She sighed heavily and went and got a mop.
10. "Logisticsbitches" knows when to stand up for yourself.
I worked at a terrible retail boutique in college. Worked my way up to management. Their pay policies were illegal, and the idiot district director they hired staffed terribly. I worked open to close by myself multiple times. I finally locked up in the middle of the day to go take a break once. Got caught. Told if I did it again I'd be fired. Said stop staffing so shitty.
They did it again. I locked up again and a customer called corporate. I was fired. Last laugh was on them because I threatened to sue them for violating employment law (longer back story not for here). Sure did. Class action. Multi-million dollar settlement getting back lost wages for 1000+ employees across multiple states. Plus unemployment for me.
Actually what led to a compete life change for me and I wouldn't be as successful now had I just let them continue to abuse me. Short term financial pain and scary when you don't know how you will afford food or how to pay bills. Made it through and definitely worth it. Not only for me but a lot of people benefited.
Fuck you PK you piece of shit. You don't deserve to still be in business.
11. "JammeyBee," teaching us all how to know our worth.
I brought a power-point into my last jobs performance review that basically ended with "I know how much I'm worth, either pay me more shit or find some other asshole to do all of the work of 5 people"
I intended for it to come of as a half joke because me and my boss were pals but he thought it made sense so he fought to get me a raise.
12. This is inspiring, "SplendiTit"
Worked at a cancer nonprofit.
Hired a lady who knew about us because her kid had cancer.
Boss wanted me to fire her because she had to come in late or leave early to take her kid to chemo.
I refused. Boss said she'd fire me if I didn't. I told her she could go right ahead. Our CEO said no way.
13. Good move, "Carpe_DMX."
My 22nd birthday I was working at a bookstore in the King of Prussia Mall. My college girlfriend of 4 years had broken up with me earlier that night.
It was around 7-8pm of a busy weekend night when I noticed a pretty awful smell. I glanced over at my manager working the other register and could tell he smelled it too, but we continued to power through a line of antsy customers.
Once we cleared the line a woman came up to me red-faced and laughing in shock and embarrassment. She said she had walked into one of the aisles to find a girl about 8 years old taking a crap on the floor.
I looked over at the manager who clearly had heard as well and said, “Dave, you can go ahead and fire me, but I’m not cleaning that up.”
14. Can't argue with this, "rkl666."
I once called in sick to my part time job at Club Monaco. My manager told me that if I couldn't find anyone to cover my shift, I was going to be fired.
So I FaceTimed her from the ER and had the doctor explain to her that I needed an MRI cause they wanted to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor.
15. Stay away from serious baristas, "Ksf5631."
I was asked whether I put my barista job first in my life before anything else (including relationships/family/education) during an argument with the cafe owner after asking for 1 hour off my 10 hour day (55 h weeks w/ only 1 30 min break) to go to a meeting.
I responded with “no” (because, obv) and he yelled at me saying I don’t deserve the job, I have no work ethic (despite going above and beyond to fix his mistakes and being the only reason half the customers stayed), I’m stupid (for being religious) and that I signed a contract to devote my life (not kidding, he said that) to this job. He finished by saying “other people would love to have this job if you’re not going to take it seriously.”
I didn’t say it, but I should have right then said “fire me, I fucking dare you”.
EDIT: I quit the next week and since then they’ve had nothing but complaints about the place and lost a whole bunch of regulars
16. That's right, "sillyn."
Boss promised me a raise for October. When I brought it up before payday he denied having doing so, and also told me he is not "getting his money's worth out of the work I do". Told him he doesn't pay me enough for it to be worth my time and gave notice.
17. Sometimes it's hard being too good at your job, "Fuchufish."
I used to work as a bartender part time after college and before law school as a side income while doing other gigs. We made a lot of money by selling wine on commission. This was Japan, and being bilingual I probably sold 5-6 times more than my Japanese coworkers. As I was applying for law schools I wanted to take a month off to visit them in the states. I was planning on a month long vacation/law school tour and asked for the month off. The bar told me that they would be understaffed and they will have to fire me if I left. Being that it's my future law school I told them fine, fire me. The day after I came back from the states I got a call from my manager asking if I had any shift requests for the month.
Keep working hard and valuing yourselves!