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Lesbian slams homophobic aunt's Facebook post about being 'canceled' from Christmas.

Lesbian slams homophobic aunt's Facebook post about being 'canceled' from Christmas.


Facebook was meant for friends, but we all know it's actually for fighting.

Some of the biggest fights on Facebook come around the holidays, when family members across the world passive-aggressively air their grievances and subtweet their least favorite family members.

If you've ever been the target of a passive-aggressive call-out post, then you know just how satisfying it can be to respond and set the record straight.

This is exactly what one woman did during the holidays on an aunt's post, and after receiving backlash from other family members, she brought her situation to the AITA subreddit.

She wrote:

AITA for calling out my aunt on Facebook, who was saying that 'they're cancelling family' to explain the truth?​​​​​

I'm a 28-year-old woman and when I was a kid, my parents always hosted the family Christmas Eve party. This year, my dad was recovering from a surgery, so I offered to host at my new house, which I share with my girlfriend.

When I was planning the party, I at first didn't really know what to do about my aunt Marie. She's always been pretty homophobic, she'd always be talking shit about 'the gays' when I was a kid before she knew.

When I came out in my 20s she became really frosty to me and basically stopped talking to me. So when I was planning the Christmas party, there was no way I was excluding my girlfriend who's estranged from her own family.

Nor was I gonna put her in a situation she has to face more bigotry. I also didn't really want to have my aunt over for my own sake, like I'm more used to it but it still makes stuff tense. And it was my own damn house.

So I ended up inviting all the family except my aunt. My dad angrily confronted me about it, and I basically told him that I know he never allows someone who'd disrespects him or his wife into his home.

Now I'm not a kid anymore - I'm as old as he was when he became a parent, I own my own home, and I'm going to be handling my household the way he raised me to, with respect for myself and my partner.

He actually apologized for putting me in an uncomfortable spot when I was young. He planned a Christmas Day dinner with her and their other siblings. The Christmas eve party itself was lovely.

Well, on Christmas day, my aunt posted this lengthy rant about how young people are 'cancelling Christmas' and about her 'woke' niece.

It was super long and super out of touch, like there's no big conspiracy to cancel family or whatever, I just personally didn't want her there.

I replied 'I assume this is about me not inviting you to the Christmas Eve party? Honestly, the holidays weren't cancelled, I just didn't invite you personally, as you have expressed hateful views towards me such as:

(I wrote a long bulleted list that is taking this way over the word limit here but some of the stuff on it was stuff like being glad AIDs killed a lot of (f slur))

I said 'Anyway, since I'm a lesbian and I share my home with my girlfriend, I specifically uninvited you due to your behavior towards me in the past. Nobody's cancelling the holidays, just you :)'

'It's not some new woke trend either, a host choosing to only invite guests who respect them and their household has existed for as long as parties have existed.'

Well that blew the hell up, my family all started calling me and texting me and saying I went too far, it was enough to just not extend an invite but it was too much for writing a massive list of like 20 years of grievances.

Some of my family was even saying it was sh**ty of me to list homophobic stuff she said before she knew I was gay? AITA for the Facebook comment I made?

The people of the internet shared their assessments.

letsnotmeetbb wrote:

NTA. If she wants to post her dirty laundry on Facebook, she better be prepared when the laundry starts to smell. Family means nothing when the people in it are the ones hurting you. Good for you OP.

diminishingpatience wrote:

NTA. She chose to take this to Facebook, not you. If she said and did those things she has to live with them and it's useless for the rest of your family to pretend none of this ever happened.

'Some of my family was even saying it was shitty of me to list homophobic stuff she said before she knew I was gay'

She still said it - who called her out on it, regardless of whether or not you were gay?

AdmiralBofa wrote:

NTA. Your family seems to be doing a thing I think of as 'first speaker privilege.' Your aunt faces no sanction for saying anything she wants, but you get called out for a response to it. What she said deserved a response.

Maybe your family would have accepted a very short 'I've experienced homophobic hate from you and you're not welcome in my home,' but I have a strong suspicion even that would have been 'too far.'

Ok_Stable7501 wrote:

I think cancelling bigots is an amazing way to celebrate the holidays. But seriously, not inviting a bigot isn’t canceling its just natural consequences. NTA.

ISTFMM wrote:

NTA. She's been shooting bullets at you for 20 years and that's fine but suddenly you post a (bullet - hehehe (sorry)) list of all she's done and NOW it's too far?

Thanks very f**king much for the low validation of me in your family priority list vs the hateful homophobe, right? F**k the lot of them. You're doing amazing.

You're standing up for yourself, you're standing up for your gf, you're refusing to give over space to people who demand it only to be hateful to you while demanding all the rest of your space as well.

Happy new year to you - keep it up being a bada*s. And if you want to, or is okay to block aunt a**hole (and flying monkeys).

You've told her off once, she can change and apologize whenever she wants to - you don't have to exhaust yourself educating the willfully uneducated.

OP is the farthest thing from TA in this situation, her aunt is unequivocally TA, but also, the enabling family falls into a**hole territory too.

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