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Man asks if he's wrong to force his wife to order off the Kids' Menu at restaurants.

Man asks if he's wrong to force his wife to order off the Kids' Menu at restaurants.


A key part of any romantic relationship is sharing food together...

Not being able to share an appetizer because you tragically fell in love with an annoyingly picky eater can be a source of tension for years that can pile up into a 3 AM kitchen meltdown in the future.

So, when a frustrated husband decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As*hole' about whether or not he was wrong to hand his wife the kids' menu, people were quick to help deem a verdict.

AITA (Am I the As*hole) for making my wife order off the kids' menu or share a meal with me?

My wife has never been a big eater. That's fine, and I don't have a problem with it. What I do have a problem with is that my wife is somehow also a greedy eater. She always prefers a large variety of foods together at a time just in smaller portions. At home, this is annoying but it's manageable. When we go out to eat though, it becomes a nightmare.

She will order whatever can get her the most variety of options, ignoring the cost. She will add sides, appetizers, and desserts to her meal, only to eat one or two bites of each thing she orders.

Maybe this would be manageable if she ate leftovers, but she refuses to so all the food just ends up going to waste. Most of the time, I find myself ordering small meals and eating what remains of her orders just to try and justify it, but I don't like 90% of what she orders and just want to eat my own damn meal.

A week ago, I got incredibly annoyed when she ordered herself a full rack of ribs and an appetizer only to eat like 20% of each. I only ordered a salad so I could finish the rest off but I hated the sauces she chose for the ribs and most of the appetizer went untouched.

As we were leaving, I told her that I'm sick of spending 40+$ on her alone for food she does not end up finishing. I told her that from now on, she can either order 2 things off the kids menu or we can work out something we both will enjoy and share. She ignored me and thought I was not serious.

Well, last night we went out to a wing place. As we sat down, I asked for a kids menu and she got confused. When we started talking and I told her that she either needed to order off the kids menu or share with me, she got quiet and refused to talk to me and started saying that I'm insulting and belittling her. We ended up going out into the parking lot and having a fight before she got an Uber home.

She's not talking to me now, and this morning I got a call from her dad screaming at me for what I did. I'm having second thoughts now about this.

Ordering off of a menu made for children might feel insulting, but it's not a horrible solution to the problem here...

Has this couple ever heard of a Tapas restaurant? Why not order a bunch of different appetizers and skip the entrées? There are a few options before jumping to 'here's a sad tiny bowl of Mac and Cheese with no seasoning and frozen chicken fingers.' Still, regularly wasting food and money is irresponsible and reckless behavior so naturally this husband wanted to put an end to it.

Here's what the jury of internet strangers had to say:

Wasting food like that is a serious peeve for me. I'm going with a NTA (Not the As*hole) here. But I think your execution of your frustration could have been better - Saphira404

I had to LOL coz you asked for a KID's MENU for your wife. The next day her DADDY calls screaming at you. Kind of makes the puzzle pieces fit IMO LOL. 'Dadddddyyyyy, my husband said I am a kid!' 'Oh no, daddy will fix it for you.'

Okay, NTA coz you you did talk to her about wasting food, wasting money. Is this the first time you've ever expressed your feelings about this? If so, then letting behavior continue until you are boiling over isn't healthy for you or for her.

Do you have any buffets nearby that would allow her to have a few bites of this or that instead of ordering entrees? You are entitled to order and eat what you want, not to just eat whatever scraps she leaves for you. - NCKALA

NTA. Being greedy and wasting food are not excuses and if she continues to want to order more food that she’s not eating I would insist if she pays for it herself - GonnaBeOverIt

ESH (Everyone Sucks Here). What she's doing is wasteful and frustrating, but you aren't entitled to control the eating habits of another adult.

Other ways to solve this?

*Assuming you have separate incomes and a budget, split the check. Let her spend or waste her own 'fun budget' money

*Try the Tapas thing or buffets, sushi, a la carte, etc

*Don't go to restaurants. Have picnics

*Focus on one restaurant each month, season, year, etc. She could order one dish each visit until she's satisfied her curiosity

*Go to marriage counseling. This doesn't seem like a deal breaker, but it is kinda weird. - simplewilddog

I'm gonna go with a soft ESH. You should have communicated better with her, and talked about it rather than forcing it on her. This would have made it a bit easier to navigate. But you are right that she shouldn't be ordering so much if she's not going to eat it. Wasting food in such large quantities is beyond privileged, and I think you should tell her that. - LilMoon317

So, there you have it!

While the opinions were somewhat divided for this one, most people agreed that something needs to be done about his wife's restaurant behavior. Insisting on wasting food and money for a DIY tasting menu is irritating, but there should probably be some sort of middle ground before jumping to a buffet of microwaved pasta and butter.

Sources: Reddit
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