Few things spur on a family feud quite like an unevenly distributed inheritance.
We've seen it in movies, and maybe even in our own lives, things can get ugly when a windfall is on the table during a time of grief and upheaval.
The AITA subreddit is no stranger to these conflicts, and in one popular post, a man asked if he's wrong for asking his sister-in-law to share how much money she got.
AITA for asking my ex-sister in law to disclose and then share how much money she got from my grandmother in the will?
I am going to try and keep this short. Grandpa was an engineer with the biggest airplane manufacturer in the world. He also had several patents for navigation software.
He and my grandma were loaded. When he died, my grandma used the money to control everyone. I didn't speak to my grandma for almost 10 years because of it. She also didn't approve of my lifestyle.
My brother was married but he was diagnosed with a very fast moving cancer in 2019. Grandma died in November and didn't have a funeral.
Last week I got a certified letter and in it all of her assets went to my former sister-in-law and her kids. As for me it said 'For reasons known to me and discussed with my attorney, I leave my grandson $1000.'
I've spoken with a lawyer and he said with the way it was worded, I could contest but it would cost a fortune, a lot of time and I'd probably lose. I called my ex-SIL and basically asked her much she got.
She said she was deeply offended by my call. That turned into a shouting match where I may have said something that sounded like I was demanding my half of the money. It makes me sick that a non blood relative is getting that money.
She hung up on me and apparently has blocked me. My mom called me only a few minutes later and said that I need to walk away and leave my ex-SIL alone. I need that money. She doesn't and certainly doesn't need my half.
I've had a miserable few years and I lost my brother. This money would be life changing to me. My mom just called me again and wanted to make sure I wasn't going to bother my SIL again.
I said I was looking into my options and no way am I walking away from this. She said I've been a major dissatisfaction to her over the last years. AITA?
Please be honest if you could leave that money alone because I can't and I don't know if that makes me an AH or not.
The people of Reddit had some very strong feelings about this one.
YTA 'That turned into a shouting match where I may have said something that sounded like I was demanding my half of the money. It makes me sick that a non blood relative is getting that money.'
Quite frankly, I believe your SIL was probably onto something. You're clearly an entitled a**hole. I hope any legal attempts to get more from her estate are fruitless. Also, ex-SIL is EXTREMELY misleading.
She's your brother's widow, she didn't divorce him. You're a heartless a**hole too. On a related note, your comment about your grandmother not approving of your lifestyle was also unnecessary (and very misleading).
In a response, you explained that it was because she didn't like how you spent your time or approve of people you spent time with.
In other words, the typical disapproval just about everyone experiences with their parents/grandparents growing up.
Psst, Your brother's kids are your grandmother's blood and their Mom is the caretaker. If you wanted to be a gold digger of your grandparents' fortune maybe you shouldn't have disappeared while your SIL stuck it out.
That money would be wasted on you and it sounds like the rest of your family agrees. Climb back into your hole and leave them alone. YTA.
Edit: Oh you are a junkie with a mountain of debt and had already burned your bridges with your grandmother and the rest of your family. She made the right choice. You aren't getting that money.
You already said you aren't backing down from this conflict, so not sure why you're asking. But since, you asked, absolutely YTA. Your grandmother had every right to leave her money to whomever she wanted.
Since you were NC for a decade, it's mind-boggling that you assumed it would be you. Just move on with your life.
YTA. Inheritances are gifts not entitlements to the living from the deceased. The money went from family to family you AH. Those are your niece and nephews by blood of your brother.
YTA. It was your grandmother’s money, and you chose not to have a relationship with her because she used it to control everyone. Do you really not see the irony here, OP?
Clearly, no one is on OP's side, and he has some internal reflection to do.