Being betrayed by a partner is one of the worst feelings on earth.
One moment, you're riding high on the intoxication of love, and the next, you're in the dumps, wondering if any of it was ever real for them.
Anger is a common and justified response to infidelity, and many people feel just as much anger toward the 'other' person as they do their ex-partner.
But there are some situations where the cheater has lied both to their partner and their 'side' person.
I got cheated on, but I couldn’t help but be nice.
I (M24) arrived from my work 3 days ago to find my girlfriend laying in bed with another guy, my initial response was to freak out and ask what was going on.
When I asked what my girlfriend was doing in bed with another guy, the guy flared up in disbelief, shaking and looking at me frantically before yelling out “HE'S YOUR BOYFRIEND?”
My girlfriend turns around to say she planned to tell him, I could only help but feel bad for him, he had no idea and she was the only one at fault here. Under rage and complete disappointment I had the urge to kick them both out.
But I ended up only kicking out my now ex-girlfriend, I told the guy to calm down and told him to stick around, I assured him I wouldn’t hurt him and to prove that I offered him a beverage which he accepted.
We ended up talking and it turns out she had mentioned she was single and had no plans for a commitment, at this point he was still panicking. I’m obviously still furious, deep down even though I know he’s not guilty I still couldn’t look him in the eyes.
Yet I felt some sort of pity, I couldn’t just kick him out in his super awkward and uncomfortable moment, I managed to be nice by putting myself in his shoes. He ended up leaving more relaxed and relieved I didn’t intend on hurting him.
It’s safe to say I’ll never see him again but I think I at least made the right choice despite having my world upside down.
You certainly responded better than most would (man or woman).
God d*mn dude for a 24-year-old you’re very mature lol. Proud of the way you handled this. You’re correct, only one at fault here and deserving of blame was the girlfriend.
But in the heat of the moment like that, it would have been easy for even the most calm and mature of people to get upset at everyone.
You handled this like a boss. She's the one that f**ked up and lied to you both. Good riddance. Now get a new mattress and move on my man.
The most interesting man in the world:
He once found his girlfriend in bed with another man, only to calm his new guest down.
Spanish guitar music plays.
Honestly, the level of maturity and self-restraint you showed here is something all us need to aspire to. I applaud you. You didn’t deserve to be treated like that and neither did he.
I’m glad you were able to recognize that even in the heat of the moment. Can’t say I would be able to do the same. Hold your head up high and be glad you dodged a bullet before you were committed with a mortgage and kids. She sounds like a real piece 👌🏼
UPDATE: The guy my ex cheated on me with came back to my house.
You read the title right, and no he had no malicious intent. He came back to thank me and to bring a few things.
Turns out my girlfriend has been giving him “presents,” he brought them to me to ask if any had belonged to me since she had been a liar and a cheat to both of us, and it turns out some did.
From (despite cheap) rings to necklaces I had “lost”, he had them. She had been giving stuff of mine to him as “presents” and pretending she had bought them for him.
He offered them back to me and asked if I wanted to get to know each other better. I agreed and now I’ve got his contact. I’m planning to meet up and get to know him better soon.
These were his words: “The last few days I haven’t been right with myself, you showed me mercy and kindness and I gave nothing in return, any other guy would have me in the hospital or worse.”
Unsurprisingly, the internet was both touched and deeply invested in this outcome.
Friends always come in the weirdest ways.
This story will make everyone tear up on your wedding 💙
Make sure to invite the ex GF.
Hopefully, something good can possibly come from the ordeal. If you don't end up friends, at least talking over the ways your ex acted can help you identify possible red flags you can learn for future relationships.
The real villain here is the cheater not you too. And for starters how cheap is this ex? Lol.
Love it. I never understood why guys always wanna beat up the other guy. More than likely they are just as much a victim with the lies and deceit. It's good to see you take the level-headed mature approach. Karma will reward you.
It is good that there is a possibility of something good coming from what your lying cheating ex did.
A reminder if you haven’t already please change your locks. As you now know your ex was also stealing from you you wouldn’t want her back in your place.
I sense a bromance. Who needs the ex? You can be besties and each other's wingman.
Hopefully, the friendship between OP and the other guy blooms, so they can glean something positive out of this situation.