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<p>It&#39;s best to step away in a moment of passion so you don&#39;t say anything you&#39;ll regret, but that&#39;s easier said than done. When a fight is in full throttle, whether it&#39;s with a friend, partner, child, or sibling, it&#39;s easy to snap.</p><p>Unfortunately, even if the words uttered in these moments are mostly fueled by passion, you can&#39;t take them back.</p><h2>In a popular <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/10ung90/aita_for_calling_my_daughter_a_selfish_insecure/" target="_blank">post on the AITA subreddit</a>, a mom asked if she was wrong for calling her daughter a selfish brat.</h2><p>She wrote:</p><blockquote> <p>AITA for calling my daughter a selfish insecure little brat?</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>My daughter (16) and I have gotten into a massive fight. My daughter has always been a picky eater and we have always done our best to accommodate her (Feeding her before parties weddings etc).</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>The problem lies with my husband&#39;s upcoming birthday (turning 50). The restaurant he has picked is very special to us.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>That is where we first met as children for a business deal our parents had, and then we became best friends when he asked me out in that very restaurant. Our first date was there.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>It&#39;s where he proposed to me and who catered our wedding, I told him I was pregnant and we held my daughter&#39;s 1st birthday there. Unfortunately, we couldn&rsquo;t go there a lot as we had to move for his job.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Basically, all the major events of our lives were held there. So for my husband&#39;s birthday to celebrate him turning half a century old, we want to go there. We once took our daughter there when she was 10 and she hated it.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>But now since she is 16 I thought she would have matured enough and I&#39;m forcing her to eat. She has the option of eating at home and I&#39;ve told her so many times that the restaurant does have food she likes to eat, but she claims it smells bad.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>It is a seafood restaurant but we always sit outside at our usual table so I don&rsquo;t understand that. She says that we are being selfish but I told her it&#39;s not about her it&#39;s not her day.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>In anger, she has refused to talk to us and not doing her usual chores and is refusing to eat. My husband is heartbroken and thinks it is all his fault and wants to cancel but I think it will just fuel her brattiness.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Today my husband had to work late so it was only my daughter and me. When I called for my daughter to come to eat she looked at the food and then took the plate and dumped it in the bin.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I was shocked, food is valuable and she didn&rsquo;t have to do that. I snapped at her calling her a selfish insecure little brat. That she is not only hurting her father but ruining his birthday and it&#39;s not as if we are asking her to give up a kidney.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>That if she continues this behavior we will never fund her birthday parties ever again. She said that I am a terrible mother for saying that. I feel like I went overboard but that she is acting like a brat. AITA?</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Edit: I am sorry for the late reply I posted this and went to sleep, No my daughter does not have anything like autism or any food allergies, we tested her when she was 10.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>We can&rsquo;t leave her at home because this restaurant is across the country from where we a going to meet our family and according to our country&#39;s laws she is still not allowed to be alone for more than a day without parental supervision.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>We have never had a fight like this and she usually is a chill kid, I have no idea what has gotten into her.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>The reason we are not too strict with our daughter&#39;s eating habits is that we grew up in houses that were verbally and physically abusive, and it affected my husband the most.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>We never had the chance to go to therapy because at first, it was not a thing then it was too expensive and well we figured we didn&rsquo;t have to.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>We did not want our daughter to be like us and we thought if she didn&rsquo;t cause tantrums who is it really affecting?</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>But my daughter has always gotten good grades and has had a lot of friends so this behavior is really unique.</p> </blockquote><h2>The internet jumped in with their thoughts and hot takes.</h2><p><strong><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/HistorySweet9902/">HistorySweet9902</a> wrote:</strong></p><blockquote> <p>NTA And I honestly don&rsquo;t understand all the AH comments. Daughter is 16, old enough to know better! Yesterday Reddit criticized a mother for always catering to her picky eater, and making sure wherever they go kid likes the food.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Now Reddit is calling OP an AH for telling her daughter NO, it&rsquo;s not about her. This girl threw food away just because, instead of saying &ldquo;no thank you, not hungry&rdquo; how is this ok?!</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>The only thing OP is to blame for, is for letting her daughter be so entitled, thinking it has to be where she wants! Because she&rsquo;s a picky eater. It&rsquo;s her dad&#39;s birthday! That restaurant is special to him.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Also wanted to add, at the end of the day OP it&rsquo;s both you and your husband&#39;s choice if you&rsquo;re going to put a stop to this &ldquo;entitlement&rdquo; like one commenter said below, she&rsquo;s going as far as to not eat in order to manipulate her parents.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>She&rsquo;s not doing her chores, and your husband is thinking of giving up and rewarding that behavior?! If you do, your daughter will go out expecting the world to cater to her, and manipulate just to get her way.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Reddit can give you a lot of advice, taking her electronics, not go out etc! And this comes from someone that was a picky eater as a kid, grew out of it! Because my mother didn&rsquo;t give me a choice!</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I couldn&rsquo;t pick McDonald&rsquo;s or fast food, just because I didn&rsquo;t like my food.</p> </blockquote><p><strong><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Initial728/">Initial728</a> wrote:</strong></p><blockquote> <p>You are NTA but your daughter certainly is. Please don&#39;t cater to her as you&#39;re right, it will fuel things. If she can&#39;t get over herself for a special dinner with her dad, why not leave her at home as she will probably just cause unnecessary drama.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>She seriously needs to grow up and learn that the world doesn&#39;t revolve around her. If she doesn&#39;t learn it now the world will teach her and it won&#39;t be a nice lesson.</p> </blockquote><p><strong><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/gte105u/">gte105u</a> wrote:</strong></p><blockquote> <p>NTA. You called her out on how she was behaving. Now if you berate her continuously it would change (I mean if OP keeps berating daughter OP would become TA). But to shock her with harsh words is needed as a teenager sometimes.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>She&#39;s not a wilting lilly. And she&#39;s old enough to know how she&#39;s acting is wrong. She can legally drive (in the US) and almost old enough to vote and join the army. She can handle being called out.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Now help her with positivity on improving going forward. If she refuses to get past herself for her father&#39;s special day leave her behind when you go there. She is old enough to travel and then stay at the room for dinner.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>That will be better than a teenage tantrum at dinner.</p> </blockquote><p><strong><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/couchmonster2920/">couchmonster2920</a> wrote:</strong></p><blockquote> <p>NTA. I was a bratty 16-year-old girl not that long ago, and sometimes we&rsquo;re jerks and need to be told that we&rsquo;re being jerks! Like you said, you&rsquo;re not forcing her to eat there, just reinforcing that this is a special event and not about her.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>She threw way too big of a temper tantrum for what she was actually being asked to do and you called her out on it.</p> </blockquote><p>It seems pretty unanimously agreed that OP isn&#39;t TA, but the current parenting methods might benefit from a fine-tuning.</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Mom calls daughter 'selfish brat' after she throws tantrum over dad's birthday food.

It&#39;s best to step away in a moment of passion so you don&#39;t say anything you&#39;ll regret, but that&#39;s easier said than done. When a fight is in full throttle, whether it&#39;s with a friend, partner, child, or sibling, it&#39;s easy to snap.Unfortunately, even if the words uttered in these moments are mostly fueled by passion, you can&#39;t take them back.In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a mom asked if she was wrong for calling her daughter a selfish brat.She wrote: AITA for calling my daughter a selfish insecure little brat?  My daughter (16) and I have gotten into a massive fight. My daughter has always been a picky eater and we have always done our best to accommodate her (Feeding her before parties weddings etc).  The problem lies with my husband&#39;s upcoming birthday (turning 50). The restaurant he has picked is very special to us.  That is where we first met as children for a business deal our parents had, and then we became best friends when he asked me out in that very restaurant. Our first date was there.  It&#39;s where he proposed to me and who catered our wedding, I told him I was pregnant and we held my daughter&#39;s 1st birthday there. Unfortunately, we couldn&rsquo;t go there a lot as we had to move for his job.  Basically, all the major events of our lives were held there. So for my husband&#39;s birthday to celebrate him turning half a century old, we want to go there. We once took our daughter there when she was 10 and she hated it.  But now since she is 16 I thought she would have matured enough and I&#39;m forcing her to eat. She has the option of eating at home and I&#39;ve told her so many times that the restaurant does have food she likes to eat, but she claims it smells bad.  It is a seafood restaurant but we always sit outside at our usual table so I don&rsquo;t understand that. She says that we are being selfish but I told her it&#39;s not about her it&#39;s not her day.  In anger, she has refused to talk to us and not doing her usual chores and is refusing to eat. My husband is heartbroken and thinks it is all his fault and wants to cancel but I think it will just fuel her brattiness.  Today my husband had to work late so it was only my daughter and me. When I called for my daughter to come to eat she looked at the food and then took the plate and dumped it in the bin.  I was shocked, food is valuable and she didn&rsquo;t have to do that. I snapped at her calling her a selfish insecure little brat. That she is not only hurting her father but ruining his birthday and it&#39;s not as if we are asking her to give up a kidney.  That if she continues this behavior we will never fund her birthday parties ever again. She said that I am a terrible mother for saying that. I feel like I went overboard but that she is acting like a brat. AITA?  Edit: I am sorry for the late reply I posted this and went to sleep, No my daughter does not have anything like autism or any food allergies, we tested her when she was 10.  We can&rsquo;t leave her at home because this restaurant is across the country from where we a going to meet our family and according to our country&#39;s laws she is still not allowed to be alone for more than a day without parental supervision.  We have never had a fight like this and she usually is a chill kid, I have no idea what has gotten into her.  The reason we are not too strict with our daughter&#39;s eating habits is that we grew up in houses that were verbally and physically abusive, and it affected my husband the most.  We never had the chance to go to therapy because at first, it was not a thing then it was too expensive and well we figured we didn&rsquo;t have to.  We did not want our daughter to be like us and we thought if she didn&rsquo;t cause tantrums who is it really affecting?  But my daughter has always gotten good grades and has had a lot of friends so this behavior is really unique. The internet jumped in with their thoughts and hot takes.HistorySweet9902 wrote: NTA And I honestly don&rsquo;t understand all the AH comments. Daughter is 16, old enough to know better! Yesterday Reddit criticized a mother for always catering to her picky eater, and making sure wherever they go kid likes the food.  Now Reddit is calling OP an AH for telling her daughter NO, it&rsquo;s not about her. This girl threw food away just because, instead of saying &ldquo;no thank you, not hungry&rdquo; how is this ok?!  The only thing OP is to blame for, is for letting her daughter be so entitled, thinking it has to be where she wants! Because she&rsquo;s a picky eater. It&rsquo;s her dad&#39;s birthday! That restaurant is special to him.  Also wanted to add, at the end of the day OP it&rsquo;s both you and your husband&#39;s choice if you&rsquo;re going to put a stop to this &ldquo;entitlement&rdquo; like one commenter said below, she&rsquo;s going as far as to not eat in order to manipulate her parents.  She&rsquo;s not doing her chores, and your husband is thinking of giving up and rewarding that behavior?! If you do, your daughter will go out expecting the world to cater to her, and manipulate just to get her way.  Reddit can give you a lot of advice, taking her electronics, not go out etc! And this comes from someone that was a picky eater as a kid, grew out of it! Because my mother didn&rsquo;t give me a choice!  I couldn&rsquo;t pick McDonald&rsquo;s or fast food, just because I didn&rsquo;t like my food. Initial728 wrote: You are NTA but your daughter certainly is. Please don&#39;t cater to her as you&#39;re right, it will fuel things. If she can&#39;t get over herself for a special dinner with her dad, why not leave her at home as she will probably just cause unnecessary drama.  She seriously needs to grow up and learn that the world doesn&#39;t revolve around her. If she doesn&#39;t learn it now the world will teach her and it won&#39;t be a nice lesson. gte105u wrote: NTA. You called her out on how she was behaving. Now if you berate her continuously it would change (I mean if OP keeps berating daughter OP would become TA). But to shock her with harsh words is needed as a teenager sometimes.  She&#39;s not a wilting lilly. And she&#39;s old enough to know how she&#39;s acting is wrong. She can legally drive (in the US) and almost old enough to vote and join the army. She can handle being called out.  Now help her with positivity on improving going forward. If she refuses to get past herself for her father&#39;s special day leave her behind when you go there. She is old enough to travel and then stay at the room for dinner.  That will be better than a teenage tantrum at dinner. couchmonster2920 wrote: NTA. I was a bratty 16-year-old girl not that long ago, and sometimes we&rsquo;re jerks and need to be told that we&rsquo;re being jerks! Like you said, you&rsquo;re not forcing her to eat there, just reinforcing that this is a special event and not about her.  She threw way too big of a temper tantrum for what she was actually being asked to do and you called her out on it. It seems pretty unanimously agreed that OP isn&#39;t TA, but the current parenting methods might benefit from a fine-tuning.

It&#39;s best to step away in a moment of passion so you don&#39;t say anything you&#39;ll regret, but that&#39;s easier said than done. When a fight is in full throttle, whether it&#39;s with a friend, partner, child, or sibling, it&#39;s...